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JANUARY 28, 1988 

Presidential Committee Reports 

Search Continues 

by Steve Trapnell 

Following the second phase of 
the search for a new president for 
Lebanon Valley College, the 
Search Committee announced 
that it had not reached an agree- 
ment with any of the three final 

According to Acting President 
William McGill, the failure to 
reach an agreement with one can- 
didate had nothing to do with the 
state of the college. It was a result 
of external factors. McGill com- 
mented that, on the part of this 
candidate, this is a "very per- 
sonal decision kind of calling." 

The Committee will continue 
the search with the aid of the con- 
sultant who helped in the second 
phase. New candidates will be in- 
terviewed and will visit the cam- 
pus in the near future. 

Dr. Arthur Ford, a member of 
the Search Committee, com- 
mented that it is still too early in 
this new stage of the search to 
determine how long it will take. 
The candidates are currently at 
various stages of evaluation. 

The consultant which the col- 
lege used in the second phase of 
the search has ties to a network 
°f people around the country who 
ar e interested in academic 
Positions. This consultant will 
continue to provide help and 

Ford commented that, after 
taking all the applications, inter- 
views, and campus visits into 
account, the Committee decides 
whether to offer the position to 
0ne of the final candidates. If a 
suitable candidate is chosen, the 
chairman of the Committee and 
tne consultant begin the final 
ne gotiations with the applicant. 

Ford continued that it is not 
^sy to match the background and 

personality of an individual with 
the needs of a college at a specific 
time. According to Ford, how- 
ever, there are promising and 
impressive people who were 
discovered in connection with the 
earlier search. "It's not a matter 
of going back to square one," 
Ford said. "It's an ongoing 

Ford said that the Committee, 
which remains unchanged since 
the beginning of the search, will 
continue looking until it is sure it 
has found the right person for the 

While the presidential search 
continues, Dean William McGill 
will continue to serve as Acting 
President. He commented that, 
when he accepted the position last 
August, he expected to serve as 
Acting President throughout this 

McGill said that he has ex- 
perienced no major problems as 
a result of his increased respon- 
sibilities. His difficulties stem not 
from the duties as president, but 
from the work load created by the 
two positions. McGill finds that 
he has to delegate some of the 
duties of the academic dean or the 
president, since he does not have 
time to personally handle all 
aspects of both. 

McGill feels that his service as 
Acting President has broadened 
his contacts with the college 
family as a whole. It has made 
him feel even more strongly that 
this college is "a vital and ex- 
citing place." 

McGill commented that, since 
the search began, the college has 
successfully continued and ex- 
panded its vital programs at a 
good pace. He is confident that 
the search will be successfully 

Andris Leads the Way 

Project Santa Helps Others 

by Douglas Nyce 

Now that Christmas and New 
Year's are past, we look back on 
the holidays with memories of 
times good and bad. This is a 
story of a very good memory. A 
memory that continues to live on 
with promises of renewed faith in 
the possibilities that man has to so 

In December, while most 
students at LVC were struggling 
to keep up with activities and to 
prepare for finals, some were 
working hard at even more noble 
ventures. Collections for Project 
Santa on our campus were under- 
taken by Matt Andris and a group 
of students, faculty and ad- 
ministration whom he organized. 

We would like to recognize 
them now. Thanks to: Toni 
Salam, Kelly May, Karen Jones, 
Denise Depalmer, Lynn Smith, 
Jen Gehrig, Jody Saltzer, Mark 
Phillips, Shawn Fitzgerald, 
Earl Weaver, Rob Crowl, Jeff 
Osbourne, Fred Neiswender, Bill 
Jester, Walt Sheets, John Diller, 
Bob Schalkoff, Steve Butz, Pam 
Shaadt, Dave Calverio and Dr. 
Hanes for being collectors for the 

Contributions totaling $456.39 
were raised for the project. 

What is Project Santa, anyway? 

Project Santa is a program 
operated by the Salvation Army 
and co-sponsored by "The Daily 
News" in Lebanon. Through it, 

money is collected to buy food, 
clothing, and other gifts that are 
then distributed to needy families 
in the area. The group from LVC 
collected for the Lebanon area, 
although such operations take 
place all over the country. 

Matt recounted some ex- 
periences he and Bob Mikus had 
working for the project in high 
school. He recalled delivering 
presents to a family in 
Philadelphia, just a few blocks 
from his own home, and 
discovering upon entering that the 
family had no furniture in their 
home. In another instance he 
remembers buying a Christmas 
tree and leaving it on the porch 


p. 2 THE QUAD Thursday, January 28, 1988 


Plea for Pledging 

by Christina Weber 

The beginning of second semester makes the people who work on 
the second floor of the Carnegie building break out in a cold sweat. 
Suddenly they find that they cannot sleep at night. Everytime the phone 
rings their imaginations run amuck with paralyzing dread of some 
catastrophe. What is it, you ask, that can do such terrible things to 
such relatively calm persons? Pledging is the horrible thing that makes 
greek/administration relations tense. 

Pledging for those of us who are greek is probably one of the best 
times of the year. But there are a few things we need to keep in mind, 
and that somehow get lost every year. Last year you might remember 
an editorial that did not look so favorably upon fraternal organiza- 
tions. The author took the word frat and rearranged it into two other 
words. One beginning with the letter r and the other with the letter 
f. (You figure it out.) As greeks we must keep in mind that not 
everyone belongs to a greek organization; therefore, not everyone 
feels favorably to the entire idea of pledging. What does this mean? 
Let's not infringe upon the rights of others. This concept works both 

ways. For example, if one does not care for the loudness at dinner 
when most of the organizations and their pledges eat, then eat at a 
different time. 

An even more important question often misplaced is why do greek 
organizations pledge students? Often it seems the answer might be 
to make idiots out of the pledges, to get mundane tasks done or to 
show up a rival organization. These answers do not make a strong 
organization, but sometimes the true answer gets lost in the excite- 
ment. Each organization is different; each possesses its own personali- 
ty. People who pledge do so because, for one reason or another, they 
desire to be part of that group. All I ask is that each greek think of 
why you pledged. Does it really matter that so and so pledge another 
group, that this organization has more or less pledges? 

The greek organizations on this campus are great in number. But 
we must keep in mind that we are not the only people living here. 
Also it is important to remember that as such a large group we can 
possess positive power on this campus if we stick together. To all 
of you pledging— the best of luck. Hang in there; it only gets better! 


Presents We Didn't Get 

by Steve Trapnell 

Upon returning to the campus after winter break, I discovered to 
my horror that something was simply not right at Lebanon Valley 

For example, after arriving and unpacking, I went to the bookstore, 
selected my books for the semester, and proceeded directly to the 
cash register. That's right, there was no line. I didn't have to stand 
in a line while trying to balance a stack of books. If you think that's 
odd, take a look at the next paragraph. 

The following day (Monday, for you slow readers), was the first 
time I did not have to go to Add/Drop Day. I'm not sure how many 
of you have experienced this little test of inner strength, but it's become 
a type of ritual for me. I open every semester by scurrying from table 
to table so I don't end up in courses I've never even heard of, let 
alone signed up for. 

On Tuesday and Wednesday, I attended the first sessions of all of 
my classes, and I don't think I had to announce my name, major, 
and what I did over break once. By Friday, it seemed that I had been 
here a lot longer than a week. In fact, it seemed like I had never left. 

Maybe it's just me, but this semester seems to have started without 
a beginning. Students plunged right into their classwork without all 
the usual trouble and bother. They were all too quickly assaulted with 
work and the routine of daily college life. The opening of this semester 
lacked the feeling of a new beginning. It was simply a continuation 
of the routine of the first semester. 

While I'm not sure exactly what gave me this feeling, I've decided 
that, in order to avoid a dull opening to second semesters in the future, 
it would be best to give students something to look forward to upon 
their return to campus. Therefore, I have composed the following 
list of Christmas presents LVC students should have gotten (but 

1. Good grades. Since semester grades tend to arrive on or near 
Christmas Eve, the most fitting present would obviously be an ex- 

cellent report. While I recognize that students do share at least some 
responsibility for the grades they receive, it still seems reasonable, 
in light of the holiday season, to ask professors to be generous. After 
all, what better way is there to motivate a student to perform well 
in the second semester? 

2. Scholarship. Naturally, after spending a small fortune on holi- 
day gifts, what family wouldn't appreciate a little help on tuition and 
room and board? While my proposal may sound somewhat radical, 
it is important to understand that I am simply advocating a full scholar- 
ship for all students in the second semester only. Each student would 
still be required to pay for his education and room and board during 
the first semester. 

3. Catered Dining Hall. This is not another attempt to complain 
about the food service department. What I am proposing is that, dur- 
ing the month of January, the college should hire an exclusive cater- 
ing service to handle all meals. Students would have their choice of 
a sumptuous meal served by a waiter or a full buffet. Naturally, all 
food service employees would have the month of January off, with 
full pay. 

4. Ski/Beach Trip. Students could choose to travel to either a ski 
resort or a beachside condominium in Florida, at the college's ex- 
pense. The trips, which would be held some time during the month 
of January, would not take the place of spring break, but would func- 
tion simply as an added incentive to help students enjoy the opening 
of the second semester. 

5. Student Expense Accounts. Under this program, the college 
would provide each student with a sort of general credit card to be 
used in local stores and malls. The card would be good throughout 
the month of January, or until a student used up his $500,000 credit 

With the installation of some or all of these programs, I believe 
that second semester could be made more enjoyable and productive 
for all students. 

Let The 
Campus Know 

Is your club or organization 
doing something different, in- 
teresting, amusing? Is it doing 
something off-campus like com- 
munity service, volunteer work, 
or a special project? 

Let "The Quad" know and 
we'll let the campus know. 

Put the information and the 
name and phone number of a con- 
tact person in "The Quad" 
mailbox in the English 


Christina Weber Managing Editor 

Steve Trapnell News Editor 

Dwayne Nichols Layout Editor 

Bryna Vandergrift Sports Editor 

Lisa Camburn Proofreader 

Staff: Rob Andrew, Ian Bonner, Joe Buehler, Chris Craig, Rick Klenk, Christopher Lonie, Mike 
McGranaghan, Doug Nyce, Toni Salam, Lance Shaffer, and Becky Snyder. 

Kathy Johnson Advertising Manager 

Bob Baker Business Manager 

Charlene Shaffer Assistant Business Manager 

Richard Arnold Financial Advisor 

Leon Markowicz Editorial Advisor 

To The 

This space is yours. 

"The Quad" invites you to let 
the campus know what concerns, 
issues and problems are on your 

What are your comments and 
suggestions for making LVC a 
better campus? 

Send your letter to "The 
Quad" care of the English 

Please sign your letter and give 
your address and phone number. 

Wanted: A 
Few Good 

Wanted: A Few Good People 

"The Quad" is looking for a 
few good people. 

We need staff writers, lay-out 
people, photographers and a 
photography editor. 

Give us your time, energy and 
talent to make "The Quad" the 
best it can be. 

We'll give you experience, 
more material for your resume 
and connections that can lead to 
internships and even jobs. 

For more details and informa- 
tion, call Leon Markowicz at 
867-4333 or stop in at 124 
College Avenue. 

p. 3 THE QUAD Thursday, January 28, 1988 


Rules Restrict Pledging 

by Bryna Vandergrift and Christina Weber 

Last week each fraternity and sorority on campus received a letter 
from the Dean of Student Affairs about one of our favorite activities- 
pledging. This letter stated rules and guidelines both old and new for 
this year's pledging season. As members of Kappa Lambda Nu and 
Delta Lambda Sigma, we decided to go out and investigate exactly 
what these new rules are and how other organizations feel about them. 

The first thing we decided to do was to go straight to the source 
and talk to Dean Yuhas. She said that the biggest change this year 
is that off-campus trips are prohibited for liability reasons. 

Other rules that seem to be restricting the organizations are most 
activities are to be confined to the respective lounges, pledging ac- 
tivities must start no earlier than 7 a.m. and end no later than 1 1 p.m., 
no drop-offs are allowed, just to name a few. 

When asked about reviewing the various pledging programs, Dean 
Yuhas said, "I'm hoping they were upfront with me." Could this 
mean she has doubts about the honesty of the greek organizations? 
If any organization is found to have broken the rules, punishment could 
range from the ceasing of pledging activities to the losing of the 

"It's our office's responsibility that we do protect the welfare of 
the pledges, and we also have to be concerned about protecting the 
college legally," stated Dean Yuhas. 

This is a good point, but it appears that not only we but the majori- 
ty of the other organizations also feel that the rules are a bit too con- 
fining. "As the years go on, the rules get tougher. The harder the 
rules become the more pledging seems like a farce," commented 
Desanie Vlaisavljevic, pledge captain of Delphians. 

Jeannie Weidner, president of Clio, had similar feelings, "We think 
the rules are a bit strict. I know they are set up to protect the pledges, 
the sororities and the school itself, but I think we are responsible 
enough to know where to draw the line. After all, we all have been 
through it ourselves. Public pledging is getting erased and that was 
the fun part. The campus enjoys pledging too, and now they can't." 

After talking with Jeannie and Des, we decided to seek some other 

Brian Sultzbauch, pledge master of Knights, "I think they are be- 
ing unfair. They are taking out all the fun of pledging." 

Mike Betz, pledge master of Kalo, "Some are a bit stringent, but 
we will do our best to abide by their guidelines." 

Jen Lord, member of Gamma Sigma Sigma, "The rules will affect 
our pledging to some extent, but as far as Gamma Sig is concerned 
it won't affect us as much as it does the social organizations." 

Fran Docherty, president of Philo, "At first I was a bit skeptical, 
but now I understand the responsibility each organization has to its 
pledges and the administration." 

Doug Terpstra, pledge master of Philo, "It's a good idea to try 
and keep it from getting out of hand, but it's still pledging. This is 
a fraternal organization; it's not a club." 

One of the biggest problems caused by these rules comes from the 
national fraternities, Tau Kappa Epsilon and Alpha Phi Omega. They 
each have national guidelines which conflict with the rules of the 

For example, APO's pledging is supposed to last six to ten weeks 
which LVC does not allow. Also, one of the requirements is for the 
pledges to do an off-campus service with a chapter at another college 
which as of now violates LVC's rules. Ben Smith, pledge master of 
APO, said, "In 1960, they approved our national chapter. Why would 
they approve something they are "hot going to allow?" 

TKE also felt that the rules will make it hard for them to pledge 
as they should. "I feel that they are very restrictive. It is hard to pro- 
mote any sort of brotherhood while under these rules," said Bill Jester, 
pledge master of TKE. President of TKE. Greg Cornman, had similar 
comments, "The new rules are strict and staying within them should 
not be that hard, but it will be difficult to accomplish anything. We 
will do our best to create a bond of brotherhood while adhering to 

All the pledges may count this as a blessing, but we believe that 
they are missing out on something. The hell we went through is what 
taught us what sisterhood and brotherhood are all about. And believe 
us, it is worth it. Good luck to all the organizations (especially the 


Education Needs Leaders 

by Douglas Nyce 

Leadership. The "buzz- word" 
of the late 80' s. Thousands of 
educators around the nation are 
now attempting to define the 
ultimate characteristics of great 
leaders and great leadership. Of 
course, each of us must form our 
own opinions on these character- 
istics, though I suspect that many 
have not seriously contemplated 
|his subject and its possible 

In this first commentary I hope 
t0 address an isolated case in a 
growing pool of people in leader- 
ship positions who lack vision, 
creativity, and high expectations 
'or themselves and those around 

"We think kids need this," 
J^s the statement by Secretary of 
bdu cation, William J. Bennet, in 
| e gard to his most recent presen- 
tatl °n of the ultimate high school 
c , Ur riculum for American Secon- 
ar y Education. Since public 
dements by this gentleman and 
ls °nly recently formed depart- 
ment are few and far between, I 
^sumed that this proposition 
°nld be an important and far- 


nig one. I was disappointed. 

■Poetry" and "Baja Whale 
Watch." His time might better 
have been spent addressing the 
fact that thousands of students 
graduate from high schools in 
this country without having the 
ability to read. They fulfilled the 
requirements of his "leaner, 
meaner, better academic 
medicine" but are left with 
illiteracy to show for it. 

Mr. Bennet stressed several 
academic areas in his plan for 
curriculum revision. On the top 
of the list was English, closely 
followed by Social Studies, Math 
and Science. While it is true that 
there is a great need for develop- 
ment of these areas, it is also true 
that even greater need is found in 
the areas of Foreign Language, 
Pys. Ed. /Health, and the Fine 
Arts. His attention to these areas 
bordered more on avoidance. 

Is it possible to learn a foriegn 
language in the two years of re- 
quired study that he proposes as 
the ultimate curriculum for 
American high schools? Hardly, 
but it isn't necessary to learn 
anything other than English, is it? 
When will the American popula- 
tion face up to the fact that most 

** e joked of courses on "Rock international misunderstandings 

are caused by misinterpreting the 
languages and customs of other 
nations and societies? 

The blundering mistakes of the 
Reykjavik summit stand out as a 
prime example. Ignorance is not 
bliss in a world of harsh physical 
realities. The violence possible as 
a result of international misunder- 
standing is not fathomable. The 
violence that has occured and is 
occuring attests to the ugliness 
that ignorance and provincialism 
can and will lead to. The United 
States can hardly think of conti- 
nuing to police a global com- 
munity which it doesn't even 
understand. The occasions when 
we attempt to in any intelligent 
manner are few and far between. 
We cannot afford to chose the 
isolationist route. It will lead to 
our demise, as I believe it already 
is. Learning the languages of 
other nations is imperitive. All 
citizens of the world should be 
multilingual. In our own country, 
Spanish is increasingly presenting 
itself as the majority language in 
several of the largest and fastest 
growing states. Can we ignore 
this trend as well? Two years of 
high school Spanish will prepare 
you for nothing but a trip to 
the nearest Spanish/English 


Can the physical fitness of our 
youth be ignored? Two years are 
inadequate. Are students no 
longer in need of exercise after 
grade 10? Health education is a 
hot topic today. I imagine S. Gen. 
Coop retched when he read of 
the two half-years of Health class 
included in this curriculum of the 
future. With the status of medical 
technology changing at the rate it 
is, stopping health education at 
grade 10 is assinine. The stu- 
dents' views on medicine will be 
outdated before they start 11th. 

Last, the one year of Art/Music 
History that is required in this 
program is an insult to the 
creative abilities of every 
American. Bennet' s curriculum 
requires no study in creativity. 
It contains no painting, drawing, 
creative writing, singing, 
instrumental performance, 
sculpting or any other branches of 
the creative arts. This section of 
the curriculum is the key to the 
resolution of the greatest problem 
in the high schools of America: 
lack of student interest. 

Learning without independent, 
useful and creative thought is 
worthless. Students will continue 
to seem as if they were made of 


Dear Dr. Savvy: 

Here's another gripe: I'm a col- 
lege student and believe that I am 
a level-headed person with good 
qualities. I wouldn't say that my 
face would appear on the cover 
of some fashion magazine, but 
I'm not totally a lost cause. 
Despite this, I still find myself 
having a bit of trouble finding 
myself a date. I'm really not that 
bad at all, but people seem to 
judge the book by the cover most 
of the time. Where does this leave 
me? Give me a tip or two, please. 

Skin Deep 

Dear Skin Deep: 

It sounds as if you are very 
honest and objective about 
yourself. Perhaps you are 
underestimating yourself a bit. 
We often become overconscience 
of ourselves. If you think you 
aren't up to any of "society's 
standards," you're wrong!! 
Who's to be the judge of that? If 
you find out, let me know. Other- 
wise, steer clear from those who 
judge you from the outside; they 
are too blind to see the wonder- 
ful you inside! 

The man of savoir-faire, 
Dr. Savvy 

stone, unresponsive and disinter- 
ested, until they are give the op- 
portunity to create. It just isn't 
cool to be creative. As long as 
students are permitted to just sit 
back and let the class go by, there 
will be no creativity. There will 
only be the continued striving for 
the easy way out of everything 
that life has to offer. 

Students must be given an 
opportunity to form a reason for 
existence and for learning. 
Without a focus for one's ex- 
istence, even the most exciting bit 
of information from the most in- 
spiring teacher will seem quite 
meaningless. The educators of 
today and those who seek to be 
the educators of tomorrow need 
to form an ultimate educational 
philosophy of their own. 

A philosophy that not only 
strives to fill the mind with infor- 
mation but also keeps the body 
and soul fit, so people can express 
themselves as a whole person, 
full of information, imagination, 
creativity, and understanding. 
They are the leaders of today 
educating the leaders of tomor- 
row. The education students 
receive now will determine the 
fate of our nation in the years to 


p. 4 THE QUAD Thursday, January 28, 1988 


Growing Up: In Proper Terms 

By Ian Bonner 

"Growing up" - it's often a 
cliche we use in everyday life. 
We think of our lives in 
chronological terms when refer- 
ring to growing up. Our child- 
hood comes to mind and then we 
look at ourselves as adults and say 
"It looks like I've grown up" or 
perhaps "I am grown up. " Does 
this mean that we are indeed 
mature or fully grown? In what 
capacity do we refer to these 
terms? What do these terms 
really mean? Let's take some time 
out to think about them and take 
them apart. 

Someone much wiser than 
myself once told me: "When I 
was growing up, I saw the world 
as being care-free, with no true 
responsibilities involved. Life 
seemed like a bowl of apples." I 
replied, "Yeah, I know what you 
mean. I can see now that I have 
no true responsibilities in life. Be- 
ing young is great!" Also, I can 
recall being asked countless 
times, "What are you going to be 
when you grow up?" The answer 
was usually vague yet I still could 
not imagine myself actually in 
those shoes. 

As life goes on and we grow 
and mature, our perspective 
changes, and we understand 
growing up quite differently than 
before. What we discover is that 
we are actually experiencing 
growth. Yet, it is difficult to em- 
pathize with feelings that have not 
yet been experienced, no less 
understand them. 

Growing up is the act of matur- 
ing and it is a constant transition 
that lasts a lifetime. It doesn't stop 
after your teen years or even your 
forties. It goes on forever. As 
much as the world outside us is 
changing, so is the world inside. 
The key to happiness and growth 
is the discovery of who that per- 
son is, and that's never so easy. 
Once we learn about our chang- 
ing self inside, we must learn to 
use ourselves in the outside 
world. And there's no doubt that 
the big, bad world never meets us 
half-way. It's at this point that we 
often back down and go into our 
little hiding places inside. It is im- 

Santa — 

cont. from p.1 

of a family that had no tree and 
only had gifts because of Project 

He found these experiences 
moved him to continue with the 
project each year since. He felt 
that the collection on campus was 
a success, although next year he 
plans to start earlier and get 
more of the campus population 

We wish you luck, Matt. 

portant to face reality in order to 
live life to the fullest, despite its 
occasional pain. 

The constant growing and 
maturing process means constant 
discovery. There are always new 
doors opening and new ideas and 
aspirations forming. Some are 
comfortable with the cliche that 

people get better with age like 
fine wine. This can be true for 
those who are not afraid of 
discovering themselves or facing 
reality. It's strange to imagine, 
but in ten years from now we will 
be completely different than we 
are today— different minds in dif- 
ferent bodies. This is inevitable. 

Hopefully, the grown person will 
be wiser and more understanding 
of life. 

Let's all face it— we're all here 
for some reason and whether or 
not it is clear to us, the reality is 
the same. The key to life is grow- 
ing up, constantly. It is important 
to keep the term in its present par- 

ticiple. Next time someone teli s 
you, "Well, I've done my grow 
ing up" then you should reply 
"OK, so you've grown up and 
you're telling me that there's not 
going to be any more change 
within you or in the world, j 
guess you're living in som e 
dimension that doesn't exist." 

You've always 

had the 

You Just 
got the 

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If you're ready to grow with us, submit an 
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who have the opportunities. 



We'll be on campus. 

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College Recruiting Coordinator 
Meridian Bancorp, Inc. 
Or write to us at: 35 N. 6th street 

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p. 5 THE QUAD Thursday, January 28, 1988 

Movie Review 

A Loony Comedy 

By Mike McGranaghan 

There's an old saying about the 
inmates taking over the asylum. 
That's the idea of "The Couch 
Trip." It stars Dan Ackroyd as a 
mental patient with a history of 
misbehaving. He does a swan 
dive off a four-story ledge and 
makes love to his psychiatrist's 
secretary. That sort of thing. 

For his actions, Ackroyd is 
faced with going back to the 
prison he came from before he 
convinced everyone he was 
crazy. He sees a way to escape 
when he intercepts a phone call 
for his shrink. The call is from 
Beverly Hills, where a famous 
radio psychiatrist (Charles 
Grodin) has just suffered a ner- 
vous breakdown. His producer 
needs a replacement for Grodin, 
one who will do a poor job, thus 
making Grodin look good. 
Ackroyd escapes from the asylum 
and heads off to California. 

Once there, he becomes an in- 
stant hit on the radio. His advice 
is frank and foul, but he cares 
about people and they know it. 
The ratings skyrocket and 
Ackroyd becomes a local celebri- 

ty, thus putting Grodin's job in 

When Grodin learns of 
Ackroyd 's hoax and subsequent 
success, he tries to kill him. To 
make matters worse, the shrink 
that Ackroyd has been imper- 
sonating also seeks revenge. And 
suddenly the sane become insane, 
and the insane become more 

Ackroyd is hilarious, playing 
the kind of part usually reserved 
for Steve Martin or Robin 
Williams. His deadpan fast- 
talking style is perfect for his 
often obscene radio therapy ses- 
sions. Also funny is the scene in 
which he takes a large group of 
people with sexual illnesses to a 
baseball game and segregates 
them by bus, "Nymphomaniacs 
stick with me!" 

Also adding to the mirth is 
Walter Matthau. He plays a street 
corner preacher and plant activist 
whose motto is "no man stands 
so tall as when he stoops to pet 
a plant." He knows Ackroyd is 
a fake and blackmails him. They 
have some nice scenes together, 

but not enough. 

If there is any problem with 
"The Couch Trip," it is that 
there should be more of the things 
that work. More scenes showing 
the radio show. More of Matthau. 
More of the relationship between 
Ackroyd and real-life wife, Don- 
na Dixon, who plays another 
shrink. Her part is useless in this 
film. When she catches on to 
Ackroyd 's hoax, she is furious 
but then suddenly forgives him. 
We are never quite sure why. 

The movie's saving grace is 
Dan Ackroyd. When he's on 
screen, which is most of the time, 
the movie is very funny. His 
radio broadcasts were so 
hysterical that I was nearly roll- 
ing on the floor. Charles Grodin 
is good, too, as he usually is. 
Also, look for Chevy Chase in an 
amusing cameo. 

"The Couch Trip" bills itself 
as "a comedy of truly loony pro- 
portions." I'll agree with that. 
Psych majors and professors are 
going to love it, and others will 
probably get a kick out of it, too. 
( * * * out of four) 


WHAT PEACE THERE IS IN SILENCE. As far as possible without 
surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly 
and clearly and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant. They, 
too, have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are 
vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with other you will 
become vain and bitter for there will always be greater and lesser 
persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. 
Keep interested in your career, however humble;it is a real posses- 
sion in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business 
affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you 
of what virtue there is. Many persons strive for high ideals and 
everywhere the world is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do 
not feign affection, neither be cynical about love, for in the face of 
all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass. Take 
kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things 
of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfor- 
tune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are 
born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline be gen- 
tle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the 
trees and stars. You have a right to be here. And whether or not it 
is clear to you, the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore, be 
at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever 
your labors and aspirations in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace 
with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it 
is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy. 

Women's Group Forming At LVC 

What does the latest research 
say are the real differences bet- 
ween men and women? Do 
women really fear success? Are 
women managers really harder to 
work for? How does a woman 
recover from physical or sexual 

abuse, drug addiction, a bad rela- 
tionship, depression, a bad 
semester? What kind of help is 
available for serious problems? 

Would you like to sing your 
latest original song to an 
"unbiased" audience? Does 
anyone on campus have the same 

problems as you? 

A women's group is forming 
on campus to answer these ques- 
tions. This group will allow LVC 
women to get together to discuss 
issues and special problems. 

The first two meetings will 
determine the interest on campus, 

a time to meet and a discussion 
of the topics or presentations the 
women would like. Professional 
women are available as guest 
speakers, discussion leaders and 

The first meetings will last one 
hour in the Faust Lounge of the 

College Center on Monday, 
February 1 at 6:30 p.m. and on 
Thursday, February 4 at 9 p.m. 
Refreshments will be served. 

Interested women can direct 
their questions to Deana Crumbl- 
ing through the psychology 
department or mailbox 175. 

smart enough 

to calculate 
the size of a 

And you're 
still smoking? 

1 Department of Health & Human Services 

"Spring Break" 

February 26— April 8, 1988 
from $279.00 

• Roundtrip air from Philadelphia, New York 
and Boston to Nassau, Paradise Island and 
Cancun, Mexico, other cities available. 

• Roundtrip transfers from airport to hotel. 

• 7 nights hotel accommodations. 

• Welcome beach parties, cruises, club 

• All hotel taxes, surcharges and gratuities. 

For more information contact: 
American Travel 
1(800) 231-0113 

• Organize a small group and earn a 




Discover How! 

You Are Invited 
To Hear These 
Challenging Messages 

I Sunday, February 7, 10:00 A.M. 
ISunday, February 14, 10:00 A.M. 

Also Hear 

Brent Detwiler 

Associate of Larry Tomczak 

ISunday, February 21, 10:00 A.M. 
•Children's Ministry Provided* 

Larry Tomczak is founder and director 
of People of Destiny, Int., a ministry involv- 
ed in starting and caring for 
Churches. He is author of 4 books and a 
popular speaker in the USA and abroad- 
known locally for his ministry at Jesus and 
Creation Festivals. He brings a message 
that challenges Christians and Churches to 
fulfull the purposes of God in this 

Hummelstown Fire Hall 
249 E. Main St. 
Hummelstown, PA 

Living Hope 

For more information call: 


p. 6 THE QUAD Thursday, January 28, 1988 

Quad photo by Becky Snyder 
Carla Myers shoots for two against Johns Hopkins. 

Women's Basketball 
Hits Hard Times 

by Bryna Vandergrift 

LVC Women's basketball 
season is not going as well as the 
team had hoped, but according to 
junior captain, Theresa "T" 
Leach, that does not mean that the 
team has given up hope. "We 
have a lot of conference games 
left and the ones we did lose were 
close, so I think we'll be all 
right," stated Leach. 

LVC, 4-6 overall and 1-3 in the 
conference, placed fourth in the 
Wilke's Christmas Tournament 
over break. Leach said that LVC 
lost to both Wilkes and Cabrini 
colleges, but both the games were 

Last week the women lost to 
Gettysburg 53-40, but LVC was 
only down by seven at the half. 
Last Saturday LVC lost to 

Delaware Valley at home in the 
last minutes of the game by a 
score of 56-49. Carla Myers 
(12) and Leach (13) were leading 
scorers in both games. 

As far as the individuals on the 
team are concerned, LVC's team 
had three players on the MAC 
statistics list last week. Cindy 
Watson and Leach were listed as 
two of the top 10 three-point 
shooters in the conference, and 
Sue Kazinski was one of the top 
ten foul shooters in the 

When asked how the team's at- 
titude is adjusting to the season, 
Leach concluded, "We're a 
young team and still learning, but 
most of all we are still working 
together as a team." 

640 AM 

Tune us in 

We'll turn you on! 

Arnold Sports Center 

Opening Delayed 

by Rob Andrew 

The new Arnold Sports Center 
will open for student use near the 
end of January 1988. The center 
was initially scheduled to open on 
the first weekend of the second 
semester. The delay, according to 
Vice President of Student Affairs 
George R. Marquette, "is due in 
part to additional time necessary 
for the curing process of the gym 

Once the building opens, 
"codes and special rules will be 
enforced without exception," 
Marquette continued. These rules 
will include guidelines encom- 
passing everything from the type 
of shoes to be worn to a specific 
procedure requiring a college ID 

Men Lose 
At Home 
Win On 
The Road 

by Rick Klenk 

Recently, LVC's men's basket- 
ball team lost a home game to 
York, 98-89, in overtime. 

LVC was leading 36-35 at 
halftime but York managed to tie 
the game in regulation at 77. A 
21 point scoring splurge in the 
five-minute overtime period gave 
York the victory. 

Ron Fevola, a junior who has 
worked his way into the starting 
lineup, lead Lebanon Valley in 
scoring with 19. Don Hostetler 
(17 points), Daryl Hess (16), and 
Bill Kline (15) also reached 
double figures. 

LVC 85 Gettsburg 67 

On Saturday, the Dutchmen 
used a early second half scoring 
run to coast to a victory over host 
Gettysburg, 85-67. 

Leading 37-36 at half, LVC 
opened the second half with a 
27-10 run and never looked back. 
Hostetler lead the Valley in 
scoring with 25. 

Kline, who finished the game 
with 21, netted 17 after halftime 
and also two three-pointers. Scott 
Barlup added 17 points, while 
Len Bolinsky cleared the boards 
with a gamehigh 1 1 rebounds. 

LVC is now 6-9 overall and 
3-2 in the Middle Atlantic 

to gain access to the building. 
These codes, as well as the 
operating hours, will be govern- 
ed by a policy committee con- 
sisting of Dean Marquette, Kevin 
Yeiser (recently named building 
manager), a faculty member, the 
director of athletics, the director 
of Physical Education as well as 
a member of the student body. 
Dr. Leon Markowicz was chosen 
as the faculty representative. 

A full time aquatics director is 
being sought as swimming will 
become part of the physical 
education program. Once the 
center is in full operation, recrea- 
tional swimming and instruction 
will be offered to the outside 
general public for a fee. The con- 

cept of making the center avail- 
able to the public on a limited 
basis "was an idea of former 
President Arthur Peterson i n 
order to maintain a strong 
relationship with the outside 
community," Marquette added. 

A student concern regarding 
the sports center has been the 
issue of the deadly railroad cross- 
ing on Railroad Street where two 
fatal accidents have occured 
within the past two years. The 
administration has addressed this 
problem and Marquette "strong- 
ly encourages students to utilize 
the footbridge." New lighting 1 
will be installed on the bridge and 
pathway to the main entrance of 
the center to insure safety. 

Dutchmen Fall to 

The Lebanon Valley College 
men's basketball team lost to the 
Diplomats of Franklin and Mar- 
shall College 77—62 Tuesday. 

Guard Scott Barlup and for- 
ward Daryl Hess led the Dut- 
chmen with 15 points each. Len 
Bolinsky had seven points and 
Bill Kline and Don Hostetler 
followed with six each. 

Lebanon Valley is now 6—10 
overall and 3—3 in the Middle 
Atlantic Conference. 

Franklin and Marshall, ranked 
20th in the nation, raised its 
record to 14—3 overall and 5—1 
in the Middle Atlantic 

27 East Main St 
P7HKH Annville, PA 

iiM MAWm ^ 867-2457 

Free Delivery 
for College 




by Rob Andrew 

The Arnold Sports Center will 
be available for full-time students 
and employees on Friday, 
February 19. 

Aetivities will begin at 12 noon 
with a Campus Ceremony that 
will feature Arthur Peterson, 
former president. Peterson will 
make waves with his inaugural 
swim in the pool. Edward H. 
Arnold and Harlan Wengert. 
trustees and contributors to the 
facility, have also been invited. 

A reception for Peterson will 
take place at 1 p.m. in the Faust 

At 2 p.m. the sports center will 
open for business for full-time 
students and employees. 

Before full-time students and 
employees can use the new facili- 
ty, however, they must complete 
a half-hour orientation session ex- 
plaining the rules and operating 
procedures for the new building. 
The orientation is necessary in 

order to demonstrate the many 
meticulous precautions devised 
by a special policy committee to 
preserve the life and function of 
the building. 

After completing an orientation 
session, each student will receive 
a special membership card that is 
required each and every time he 
wishes to gain access to the 

Sessions will continue through 
Thursday. February 18. at the 
times specified in the College 
Center "Red Book." 

Students are being sought to fill 
various employment positions at 
the new center such as control 
desk personnel, lifeguards and 
support staff. Lifeguards must be 
able to show certification papers. 
Applications can be picked up at 
the Athletic Office or the College 
Center Desk and are to be return- 
ed to the Dean of Students Office 
in Carnegie Hall. Several posi- 
tions still remain available. 

HA Thousand Clowns" 

Play Preview 

The winter play. "A Thousand 
Clowns" by Herb Gardner, will 
be Presented February 12. 13. 
^ 14 at 8 p.m. in the Little 
lhe atre. Tickets will be $4.00. 

The comedy deals with Murray 
Burns (played by Bill Spelling), 
an irresponsible and often 
"employed television script- 
^ nte r, and his live-in nephew 
Nlck (Kelly Green). Murray 
t ° u 'd lose custody of Nick due to 

e efforts of a social welfare 
genc Y. represented by Albert 

Amundson (David Andrews) and 
Dr. Sandra Markowicz 
(Katherine Henry). 

The play also features Leo 
Herman (Ken Krawchuk). an un- 
funny children's comedian who 
plays "Chuckles the Chipmunk" 
on a television children's show. 
Abigail Burns Scott (Sue Toland) 
is Murray's sister and literary 

"A Thousand Clowns" is 
directed by Dr. John Kearney and 
produced by Tara Thomas. 

If You Want, 

See Campus Apathy 

p. 4 

FEBRUARY 11, 1988 

Sports Center to Open Feb. 19 

Peterson Makes 
A Splash 

Vietnam War Brought Home 

by Joe Buehler 

The Vietnam conflict is now a 
historical event to be studied. 
Many of Lebanon Valley's facul- 
ty, administrators, and workers 
lived through the Vietnam era. 
Dr. Eugene Brown, associate 
professor of political science, 
taught the class. Vietnam: The 
Experience, last semester. 

Brown served in Vietnam in a 
non-combative position. Even 
though not in combat. Brown and 
many others had to live in fear 
because of the instability of the 
Vietnamese government. Brown, 
in teaching this class, used an 
open-minded approach as he 
showed his students as many dif- 
ferent sides of the war as 

First, the class studied the war 

as a historical event. Through the 
use of Stanley Karnow's book, 
"Vietnam: A History." and 
PBS's: Companion Series (video 
tapes), the students were able to 
follow the war chronologically. 
After this segment of the course, 
the students were visited by and 
heard accounts from Veterans 
and other special guests. 

Glenn Woods. English pro- 
fessor at Lebanon Valley, was 
one of the guest speakers. Woods 
got involved with Vietnamese 
refugees by teaching them 
English, but soon became more 
personally involved. He went on 
to help the refugees find housing 
and even developed close friend- 
ships with many of them. 

Among the other guest speak- 
ers was Mrs. Ann Thompson, 

wife of professor Warren Thomp- 
son, who told the class of her ex- 
periences as a Vietnam Army 
nurse. Her account of the wound- 
ed and how the war affected her 
showed many students how deep 
the scars of Vietnam really are. 

Lew Cooke, equipment mana- 
ger for Lebanon Valley athletics, 
intrigued the class and touched 
the hearts of many students with 
his account of what it was like to 
be an infantryman in Vietnam. 
Cooke also explained the prob- 
lems he had once he returned 

Finally, the last in the series of 
guest speakers not only got the at- 
tention of the class, but also at- 
tracted the attention of the media. 
Don Bailey. Auditor General of 

See Vietnam p. 5 

p. 2 THE QUAD Thursday, February 11, 1988 


Condoms On Campus 

by Christina Weber 

Condoms. Yes, that's right, you have just read the word condoms. 
You know what they are. Condoms are the rubber things that come 
in neat little packages which when filled with air make wonderful party 
balloons. They also can be used as a contraceptive device and as a 
means to insure safe sex. If you paid attention to the news last week, 
you would know that a local institution of higher learning has made 
condoms available to its students. The school is Millersville Univer- 
sity. The place where the students can purchase the provocative pro- 
phylactics is the laundry room. Not a bad idea. Besides the bathroom, 
where do we all go that would make a semi-inconspicuous place to 
purchase condoms? Millersville has taken a refreshing, intelligent and 
controversial step into the future. 

Why not LVC? Now that Millersville has boldly broken the 
binding moral boundaries that still surround us in the late 1980's, 
will other universities and colleges follow suit? Or will they stay in 
the safe dark claiming that they will lose major funds by causing such 
damaging discord? Private funders (such as the Methodist Church, 
for example) would not pull out if the school hired another security 

guard to protect the students. Why should they retract their donations 
because the students' health is being protected? 

Are condoms on campus a bad idea because AIDS is not a real 
threat? Because college students are not having sex? Because college 
students only have one sex partner? Because college students are not 
gay? Because college students are all responsible enough to purchase 
condoms at the local drug store? Because making condoms available 
to students promotes promiscuity? 

Remember AIDS is not a myth. Real people are really dying of 
AIDS. College students are having sex. College students (just as many 
other people) do not always have only one sex partner. Yes, there 
are gay college students. Homosexual intercourse is not something 
that occurs only after graduation. In the heat of passion it is easier 
to scoot down to the laundry room to get a rubber than it is to run to 
the drug store. Having sex is not a question of whether or not there 
are condoms in the laundry room. 

Now give me one extremely good reason why condoms should not 
be made available to college students everywhere even at Lebanon 


They're Here 

by Steve Trapnell 

We're deep in the middle of second semester. That's right-there's 
snow on the ground, grey clouds in the sky, and prospective students 
on the campus. While high school age students visit the college at 
any and all times of the year, they seem to come in greater numbers 
during the second semester. There are special orientation days, and, 
later in the semester, students who have elected to come to the col- 
lege will inevitably show up for early registration. 

In order to clear up the confusion which so often results when pro- 
spective students visit the campus, I would like to propose a Com- 
prehensive Guide for Student Behavior in the Event of Visiting Pro- 
spectives. This guide is not binding, but is simply a series of sugges- 
tions to help students cope with the responsibility of maintaining the 
image of the college. 

Upon learning through the grape vine that a group of off-campus 
students has arrived for a visit, each student should proceed directly 
to his dorm room (commuters should, for their own safety, leave cam- 
pus). Every student is immediately responsible for neatening the ap- 
pearance of his room. This includes destroying any incriminating 
evidence, pulling unused textbooks out of dark closet corners and plac- 
ing them on shelves where they will be easily seen, and throwing away 
anything that smells. Naturally, all this is done in case a campus tour 
needs to enter the room. Only one or two rooms will probably be 
used in each tour, but all rooms should be prepared, just in case. 

In the library, any students using game programs in the microlab 

should replace the games with actual work as soon as a tour enters. 
Word processing is an example of actual work. Printing eight-foot 
long signs for your friends is not. Any students using library com- 
pact disc players to listen to heavy metal music should replace their 
discs with classical music. In order to promote the appearance of a 
working library, it would help to have several students leafing through 
the card catalog during every tour. 

At the college center, those students playing pool or video games 
should, in the event of off-campus visitors, proceed to the nearest 
snack shop table and begin discussing their favorite professors. Polite 
disagreements about which professors are best are permitted, as long 
as no shouting occurs and nothing gets broken. Any students in the 
college center who are watching reruns of "Diff rent Strokes" or 
"Silver Spoons" should immediately change to PBS and begin tak- 
ing notes on whatever documentary is currently being shown. 

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, each student, when con- 
fronted with prospective future students, must become an instant lob- 
byist for his or her major. What better way is there to encourage 
visiting high school students to attend this college than to have cur- 
rent students argue over them? What could make a person feel more 
wanted than the sight of a music major and a biology major slugging 
it out over which department will get to interview a prospective 

While these activities may be helpful during campus tours, it is im- 
portant to note that all students should feel free to return to their 
normal daily routines after the tour leaves. 


Christina Weber Managing Editor 

Steve Trapnell News Editor 

Dwayne Nichols Layout Editor 

Bryna Vandergrift Sports Editor 

Lisa Camburn Proofreader 

Staff: Rob Andrew, Ian Bonner, Joe Buehler, Chris Craig, Rick Klenk, Christopher Lonie, Mike 
McGranaghan, Doug Nyce, Toni Salam, Lance Shaffer, and Becky Snyder. 

Kathy Johnson Advertising Manager 

Bob Baker Business Manager 

Charlene Shaffer Assistant Business Manager 

Richard Arnold Financial Advisor 

Leon Markowicz Editorial Advisor 




By Ian Bonner 

This coming fall there will be 
a slight change in orientation for 
new students at Lebanon Valley 
College. The "Orientation 
Team" concept has been 
developed by Director of Ac- 
tivities, Dave Calvario, in order 
to better accommodate the new 
students at the beginning of the 
school year. 

The program will be similar to 
the Big Brother/Big Sister pro- 
gram used in the past. The main 
difference is, according to 
Calvario, there will be groups of 
four or five students (Orientation 
Teams) to meet and greet the new 
students and help them with any 
questions or problems they may 
have in the opening days of the 
semester. They will be available 
to meet the new students not on- 
ly during the first week of the 
semester, but a couple of weeks 
after as well to answer any 
further questions. 

During orientation weekend in 
August, students participating in 
the program will be given T- 
shirts in order to identify 
themselves as Orientation Team 
members. Calvario said, 
"Students have shown that peer 
contact is the greatest contact. I 
believe this will be a beneficial 
experience for both the new 
students and those participating in 
the program." 

Applications are now available 
for any students interested in par- 
ticipating in the program. They 
can be obtained at the college 
center desk and must be returned 
by February 26. 

Spring Lecture Series 
Features Coca-Cola Executive 

The Second Annual Fred J. 
Springer Lecture in International 
Business Managment will take 
place on Tuesday, February 16, 
at 7:30 p.m. in the Little Theatre. 

Willem F. Westerman, Vice- 
President and Manager of Orien- 
tation Programs and Corporate 
Guest Affairs of Coca-Cola Inter- 
national will speak on 
"Marketing Coca-Cola Around 
the World." 

The lecture series is endowed 
by Fred J. Springer and I.B.M- 
Springer's daughter, Meg* 
graduated from LVC in 1987 
with a degree in International 
Business and completed tne 
Honors Program. 

The college will host a recep' 
tion for Westerman at 5:30 p 111 ' 
in the Mund College Center. A 
formal dinner, with a $5 charge 
will follow at 6:30. 

p. 3 THE QUAD Thursday, February 11, 1988 

Young Democrats 
Sponsor Dinner 

By Ian Bonner 

The Young Democrats of 
Lebanon Valley College will 
sponsor a Campaign '88 Dinner 
with guest speaker Lt. Governor 
Mark Singel on Thursday, 
February 18 in the West Dining 
Room. It is open to all students 
free of charge and will cost $5 for 
guests. The dinner will begin at 
6:30 P.M. 

Following the dinner, the 
Democratic Presidential Debate 
will be shown live via a special 
satellite hook-up in the 
Underground at 8:30 P.M. There 
will also be phones hooked up so 
students can call in to voice their 

Students need to sign up in the 
Red Book and give their meal 
card number. 

The Jabberwocks, a five-male a cappella group, will perform at Lebanon Valley College in the Underground on February 15 at 
8:30 p.m. The event is sponsored by Student Council. 

The group specializes in fifties music, but can perform music ranging from forties, to revamped standards, to contemporary classics. 
Based in Boston, Massachusetts, The Jabberwocks have toured throughout the United States, with many appearances on the national 
college circuit. They have also released two albums. 

Students And A Secure Campus 

by Rob Andrew 

Campus security has always 
been a favorite gripe of students 
living in college communities. As 
demonstrated last semester here 
at LVC, whenever vandalism or 
exposure or any other alleged 
crime is committed on campus, 
the finger is hastily pointed in the 
direction of the security forces for 
not adequately doing their job. Is 
upgrading or reforming campus 
security forces really the best way 
to deter campus crime? 

On April 5, 1986, a 19 year- 
old freshman girl, Jeanne Ann 
Clery, was brutally raped, tor- 
tured and then murdered in her 
dorm room at Lehigh University. 
Students, parents and ad- 
ministrators were outraged. 
They, too, were quick to blame 
campus security forces for not 

The Road Less Travelled By 

by Christopher Craig 

It is a "march of folly" indeed 
when counter-productive and un- 
workable policies are pursued 
against the wishes of a communi- 
ty, and against the judgment of 
those who are charged with the 
duty to enforce and execute such 
a Policy. 

As our semester extends into 
tfl e month of February, and our 
country celebrates the 55th an- 
niversary of the repeal of the 1 8th 
amendment, effectively ending 
the federal prohibition of liquor, 
We once again find our "leader- 
slll P college" still pursuing its 
^tdated policy of prohibition. 

ne college adminis- 
tration's attempt to legislate and 
enforce morality on the campus 
j S£ jn example of a "march of fol- 
v - The administration's prac- 

taking the proper measures to 
secure the campus. As a result, 
Jeanne's parents began a crusade 
to improve security on college 
campuses across the state. The 
fruit of their labors became 
known as the College and Univer- 
sity Information Security Act, or 
technically termed "House Bill 

The contents of House Bill 
1900 are very straight forward. 
First, it would require each col- 
lege to include in its admissions 
prospectus a detailed list of all the 
crimes reported on college-owned 
property within a three year 
period as well as the size and type 
of the security force maintained 
by the college. Each school 
would also have to comply to 
such standards as having regular 

foot patrols of campus property 
by security officers, a registration 
log of all non-resident students 
who are guests in the dorm, out- 
side entrance doors on dormi- 
tories that lock automatically and 
single-sex dorms on demand to all 
students who request them. Also, 
House Bill 1900 requires that an 
emergency phone number be pro- 
vided and posted conspicuously. 

House Bill 1900 is the result of 
over a year of intensive studies 
completed by the Clerys and the 
Pennsylvania House of Represen- 
tatives. The hypothesis is that if 
the provisions of House Bill 1900 
are followed, campuses will be 
effectively secure. 

Does LVC need what this bill 
has to offer? Our officers not on- 
ly make frequent foot patrols, but 

they are constantly roaming 
around campus on foot because 
they do not yet have the luxury 
of a patrol car. It is already re- 
quired that students register their 
overnight dorm guests, even 
though few students ever register 
their guests. The outside en- 
trances really do lock auto- 
matically, at least on the girls' 
dorms, although one would never 
know it by walking behind 
Vickroy at any hour of the day or 
night. Yes, single sex dorms do 
exist on demand here at LVC; in 
fact, students have no choice but 
to live in segregated housing. 
Last, on nearly every bulletin- 
board, one will find the ever 
famous "Walt Smith Beeper 
Memo" listing all the emergen- 
cy phone numbers and how to 

reach security at any hour. 

Does LVC really need House 
Bill 1900? At this point, abso- 
lutely not. House Bill 1900 is sup- 
posed to create an ideally secure 
campus. Security has provided us 
with nearly everything mandated 
in the legislation. The final 
responsibility to making security 
work rests with the students. 
What LVC and other colleges 
across the state really need are 
students who possess an aware- 
ness that propped open doors and 
torn-down emergency phone 
number posters are not an effec- 
tive way to deter crime and keep 
college communities secure. 

Note: House Bill 1900 was 
referred to the Education Com- 
mittee of the State Senate on 
October 28. 1987. where it has 
remained without support. 

The March of Folly 

tice of a double standard, the 
Resident Assistant's unequal and 
often self-serving enforcement 
and the impact of the college's 
policy on the campus all serve as 
classic examples of an unpopular 
and self-defeating pursuit of 

Unfortunately, the college ad- 
ministration's ban on alcohol on 
campus is, in itself, a double stan- 
dard. The administration is not 
serious about the enforcement of 
the policy. According to the col- 
lege's annual budget audit for the 
fiscal year ending June 30, 
1987, Lebanon Valley College 
appropriated $1,766 dollars for 
"General Security," which does 
not include funds for the salaries 
of the four part-time security per- 
sons and one full-time person. 
That seems to be a large sum of 

money, but not when compared 
to the $11.6 million dollars in 
total annual expenses. After 
several reported cases of campus 
vandalism throughout the year, 
"The Quad" has leveled many 
charges contending that campus 
security is inadequate. If there is 
any truth to phrase, "money 
talks," the college's seriousness 
about the enforcement of their 
policy is just a whisper. 

In addition to this fact, there 
has existed widespread com- 
plaints maintaining that the Dean 
of Student Affairs has a practice 
of only enforcing the college's 
policy in certain dorms (not 
publicly stated, but practiced). 
The fact that the policy is not 
equally enforced on the campus 
clearly demonstrates the 
hypocrisy of the policy. 

During the 1920's. 30's and 
40's the federal government at- 
tempted to enforce the prohibition 
on liquor, but all efforts were to 
no avail. The nation lacked the 
resolve, money, personnel and 
DESIRE to make people alter 
their behavior. In fact, statistics 
have proven the government 
would only enforce their policy in 
select areas. These same symp- 
toms of the failure of the Prohibi- 
tion Act are now clearly visible 
on the LVC campus. How long 
can this administration sit in its 
"ivory tower" and ignore the 
reality of failure? 

Not only has this policy of 
abstinence been a farce and a 
failure during the last few years, 
but self-interest has often been the 
prime motivation for individuals 
who continue enforcing the 

policy. The college administra- 
tion fears that by giving in to 
students' demands for reform, 
endowment money conditioned 
on the college \s alcohol policy 
would be lost. 

So. reluctant to assume the 
burden of enforcement, the ad- 
ministration has charged the 
students, (those who are the target 
of the policy), with enforcing this 
unpopular policy. The Resident 
Assistants then must face stu- 
dents' harassment when they en- 
force the policy, and pressure 
from the Dean of Student's when 
the policy is not enforced. Few 
among the RAs truly believe in 
the policy. It has always been in- 
teresting to see freshmen drink on 
campus, only to become RAs 
during their sophomore year. The 

See March p. 5 

p. 4 THE QUAD Thursday, February 11, 1988 

Campus Apathy Plagues LVC 

by Steve Trapnell and Ian Bonner 

How many students on this 
campus are aware that: 

1 . Several general Protestant 
worship services have been 
held on Sunday evenings'? 

2. A Writing Center exists to 
help students with their 

3. WLVC, an on-campus AM 
radio station, broadcasts a 
variety of regular weekly 

letters to the editor? 

5. The college schedules 
special guest performers on 
a regular basis? 

6. Transportation to away 
football games is provided 
for only $1? 

These are just a few of the ex- 
amples of programs or services of 
the college which are poorly sup- 
ported by the general student 

There seems to be a mood of 
apathy at Lebanon Valley Col- 
lege. The American Heritage 
Dictionary of the English 
Language defines apathy as a 
'"lack of interest in things 
generally found exciting, in- 
teresting, or moving: indif- 
ference." This definition seems 
to fit our current situation. 

It often seems that the students 
who are involved in one activity 
or event also help with others. 
There is a core of students who 
help to lead and organize many of 
the groups. Is it really necessary 
for these few hard-working 
students to run all the campus 
clubs? Are the talents of this cam- 
pus delegated to a select few in- 
dividuals? It is probably not lack 
of talent, but lack of enthusiasm 
or dedication on the part of other 
students that leads to this limited 

Many of the people who have 
achieved leadership positions in 
various organizations would pro- 
bably admit that, with a little ex- 
tra help or a few more members, 
their clubs could get a lot more 
done. Sure there is work to be 
done in almost any club or group, 
but there is also a lot of fun. 
Working in a campus organiza- 
tion can help make students more 
aware of the needs of the campus, 
and it will better enable them to 
satisfy these needs. 

Naturally, some people will 
argue that they do not have 
enough time to join a club. 
Everyone, regardless of their ex- 
tracurricular schedule, has to at- 
tend classes and do classwork. 
Some people spend more time on 
classes or outside work than 
others. This is to be expected. 
Still, many people find the time 
to take leading roles in activities. 
While it could be argued that their 
grades suffer, it should be noted 
that there are many students on 

campus who are both academical- 
ly successful and heavily involv- 
ed in extra activities. This is a 
balance that can be achieved. 

It is also important to realize 
that most, if not all. of the cam- 
pus activities are directly tied in 
to the academic arena. For exam- 
ple, a political science major 
would find it beneficial to join the 
political science club to further 
expand his horizons and to give 
more flavor to the academic part 
of his discipline. 

If a student feels the time or 

talent is lacking to become in- 
volved in a play or musical, in the 
newspaper or the radio station, 
the student still has no excuse 
for not supporting these 

Often the programs or products 
of the clubs are free or cost very 
little. How difficult is it to take 
an hour or two to watch a play, 
attend a recital, or listen to a 
friend's radio show? Some 
students would respond by saying 
that, if they felt these projects 
were worthwhile, they would 

support them. Before making this 
accusation, however, each stu- 
dent must consider his own per- 
sonal involvement. If he finds an 
organization lacking, perhaps he 
could join to improve it. 

Early this academic year, 
Lebanon Valley almost lost its 
yearbook due to a number of fac- 
tors, including student apathy or 
lack of interest. While many 
students may have complained if 
there had been no yearbook, very 
few people seemed to care 
enough to take the time to 

organize a staff. 

If everyone were less apathetic 
and took advantage of what this f 
school had to offer, we would all 
benefit. If you feel that you do not 
have the time or ability to join a 
club, the least you can do is sup- 
port the projects that your friends 
have spent so much time prepar- 
ing. There's more to Lebanon 
Valley than classes and partying; 
becoming involved in campus ac- 
tivities is rewarding both to the 
institution and to the individual. 


Say hello 
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For those graduating with 
backgrounds in computer 
science, information systems 
or mathematics: 

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Processing team—a vital, dynamic function 
of Meridian Bancorp, Inc., one of the largest 
financial services institutions in the mid- 
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We offer our professionals: 

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We provide a training program to orient you 
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and to enhance the skills you already have. 

Interested? Ask your Placement Office 
for more information or send your resume 
of qualifications to: 

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Say hello to Meridian. The beginning of a 
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Professionals with the personal touch. 

An Equal Opportunity Empfoyer M/F/V/H 

p. 5 THE QUAD Thursday, February 11, 1988 

[Women's Intramural Volleyball— Q uad P hot ° b y Chris Lome 

Scrubs battle Second Floor Vickroy. 


cont. from p. 3 

lure of a free room and free boar- 
ding is strong at an $11 thousand 
dollar a year college. Self interest 
has always been a powerful 
motivator for those who aspire to 
become Head Resident Assis- 
tants, and become motivated to 
aggressively pursue this policy of 
double standards. 

Probably the strongest argu- 
ment that can be forwarded 
against this "march of folly," is 
that the policy is counter- 
productive. In essence, the ban on 
alcohol on campus only changes 
the location of the drinking. The 
danger of this practice, is it only 
increases the possibility of in- 
dividuals returning from "off- 

campus" parties driving intox- 
icated. Is the potential of a DUI 
related fatality worth the pursuit 
of a no-alcohol policy? 

Studies during the prohibition 
era have revealed that such a 
"taboo" on the consumption of 
liquor only made drinking 
fashionable. That is the very last 
thing any college wants to foster. 
There is no evidence to suggest 
that the prohibition on alcohol ac- 
tually curbed consumption. Some 
historians assert that, because of 
the fashionableness of drinking, 
the number of people who drank 
increased. In the final analysis, 
the College should not make deci- 
sions related drinking for the 


27 East Main St 
* m Annville, PA 


Free Delivery 
for College 



by Rob Andrew 

The Lebanon Valley College 
Republicans, in conjunction with 
the Young Democrats, will spon- 
sor open houses during the 
Presidential Debates on February 
18 and 19. 

The Democratic debate will be 
held on Thursday, February 18, 
followed by the Republican 
debate on Friday, February 19. 

The programs will be broadcast 
live via satellite on a large screen 
television in the Underground 
beginning at 8:30 p.m. Students 
will have the opportunity to ac- 
tually ask the candidates ques- 
tions by calling a toll free number 
on a phone provided in the 

The effort is an integral part of 
a long term goal of both the Col- 
lege Republicans and the Young 
Democrats to present factual, un- 
biased information so an educated 
view of politics can be concep- 
tualized. Dave Calvario, Director 
of Student Activities, feels the 
program is "worthwhile" and 
encourages all students to attend. 


Students should not live in an 
environment sheltered from the 
realities of "the real world." 
This is not an argument conten- 
ding drinking is good, but only 
that it is not morally evil and it 
is not a behavior that should be 
regulated by the college. Only 
those who maintain the power to 
influence college policies can 
alter the "march of folly." But, 
as long as the double standards 
and self motivating individuals 
are allowed to execute such a 
flawed policy, our "leadership 
college" will remain with its head 
buried in the sand ignoring the 
reality of a failed policy. 


Otherwise healthy 
to participate in a study of a new 
drug for asthma. 

Pulmonary Division 
Hershey Medical Center 
Earn up to $600 


Energetic non-smoking 
mother's helper (housework 
required) or babysitter (no 
housework) to care for a five 
year old boy and three year 
old girl in N. Palmyra home. 
Part-time, nights. 
Own transportation. 

Call 838-9186. 

A ©#$%*!& Movie 

by Mike McGranaghan 

In case you don't what the 
@#5% "Eddie Murphy Raw" is, 
I'll tell you. It's a @#$%*!& con- 
cert movie in which Eddie trashes 
Brooke Shields ("the whitest 
woman in the world"), Michael 
Jackson, and Bill Cosby, among 
others. He also talks for a half a 
@#$%*!& hour about why men 
@#5% and why women ought to 
@#$% but don't. Naturally, no 
one is safe from his witty jabs. 
Not even Mr. T, who Eddie says 
is trying to beat the @#$% out of 
him. And don't get him started on 
©#$%*!& homosexuals! We all 
know what he thinks of them! 




In the next few weeks, some 
special events will occur in the 
Lynch Gymnasium. Everyone is 
invited to come out and enjoy the 

Saturday, 11 a.m. 
Women's Alumni Basketball 
February 13 game. 
Saturday, 2 p.m. 
LVC Women's Basketball 
vs. Dickinson. 
Saturday February 20 
6 p.m. -Men's Alumni 
Basketball game. 
8 p.m. -LVC Men's Basketball 
vs. F&M. 
Halftime-Presentation of the 
"Hot Dog" Frank Athletic 
Service Award to 
Drs. Russell Gingrich, 
Robert Early, and 
Robert Kline. 
After the game, the fourth an- 
nual "Hot Dog" Frank celebra- 
tion with hot dogs and soda for 
everyone! Free! 

Then, of course, there's the 
socially significant part. Murphy 
goes in depth to figure out why 
the @##% white people can only 
do one @#5%*/cfc dance. 

Is this funny? Yeah, I suppose 
a lot of it is. Sometimes Eddie 
rambles on a little too long and 
you want to tell him to shut the 
@##% up. But for most of the 
film, his perceptions are right on 
target. As long as you don't take 
what he says too seriously, and if 
you don't mind the word @##% 
every 2.4 seconds, you'll pro- 
bably find "Eddie Murphy Raw" 
one @#$% of a funny movie. 
(*** out of four) 

Vietnam— con't from p. 1 

the state of Pennsylvania, served 
in Vietnam as platoon leader with 
the 101st Airborne Division. He 
was heavily decorated for cour- 
age, valor, and leadership in 

Since returning from Vietnam, 
Bailey has been very active on an 
array of veterans' issues. 
However, he has given special at- 
tention to the issue of accounting 
for Americans still listed as MIA 
(Missing in Action) from the 
Vietnam conflict. Bailey stressed, 
during his presentation, that Viet- 
nam was a winable war. The 
failure, he felt, existed at the 
American homefront where many 
people did not stand behind our 
country's actions. 

As the class progressed, it was 
clear that every one had different 
views on America's involvement 
in this war. However, it became 
evident during class discussions 
that everyone felt compassion for 
those who lived through the Viet- 
nam era, including veterans, 
parents, wives and "draft 

For most of the students the 
most significant event was getting 
a chance to talk one on one with 
Vietnam veterans at the Veteran 
Center in Harrisburg. 

The Hairworks 

445 E. Maple St. Annville 

Salon Services: 

Perms Frostings Condition 
Color Highlights Treatment 

Men & Women's Hairstyles 

Nexxus Redken Products 

S.C.A. Wolff Sunbed 
$30.00 for 10 Sessions 
$4.00 per visit 
By Appointment 


p. 6 THE QUAD Thursday, February 11, 1988 

Drops Three 

by Bryna Vandergrift 

"I'm very happy with the way 
things are going. They have real- 
ly worked hard and it's paying off 
because we get better and better 
and we keep making higher 
goals," stated LVC women's 
basketball coach, Jodi Foster. 

Lebanon Valley dropped games 
last week to Johns Hopkins 
67-49, Messiah 71-59, and F&M 

"I was happy with the Messiah 
and F&M games," said Foster. 
At one point in the Messiah 
game, LVC was down by 23 
points and came back within 10 
but got into foul trouble. F&M is 
ranked nationally and second in 
the region, but LVC was within 
10 points until six minutes left in 
the game. "The score doesn't do 
justice," stated Foster. 

As far as the Johns Hopkins 
game, Foster felt that the team 
didn't play well at all, "We had 
just beat them the week before. 
Every year we have a game that 
is a nightmare and that was it." 

Individually, team members 
Sue Kazinski and Carla Meyers 
are on the top of the statistics list. 

Kazinski is ranked 7th in the 
MAC with 10.5 rebounds a 
game. When asked how she felt 
about her play, she said, "I think 
that there is still room for im- 
provement and I would like to 
contribute more to the team, but 
I feel that I am offering 

Meyers, a freshman who also 
made the All Wilke's Tourna- 
ment Team, leads the team in 
scoring with 14.1 points a game 
and nine rebounds. Meyers said 
she put in a lot of hard work to 
get her starting position as a 
freshman. "It was a totally dif- 
ferent look when I came here to 
play, but luckily it seemed pretty 

Kazinski finished by saying, 
"Next year we'll be something 
that people will be able to look up 

LVC has six games left, three 
of them conference games. 

The home games are on Satur- 
day, February 13 at 2 p.m. 
against Dickinson and the season 
finale on Wednesday, February 
17 at 7 p.m. against Western 

Men 's Intramural Basketball Action: APO Against FCA 

Quad photo by Chris Louie 



Knights 85 APO 13 
Knights 88 FCA 37 
Residents 36 TKE 32 
Residents 45 Knuckleheads 44 
Knuckleheads 55 KALO 48 
KALO 100 PHILO 20 
TKE 49 ChickenHawks 47 
ChickenHawks 72 PHILO 24 
PHILO 35 FCA 33 ot 

Residents 2-0 
Knights 2- 
KALO 1-1 
Knuckleheads 1-1 
ChickenHawks 1-1 
TKE 1-1 
PHILO 1-2 
APO 0-1 
FCA 0-2 



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by Rick Klenk 

On Saturday. Lebanon Valley 
men's basketball team lost to host 
Dickinson College. 80-68. 

After falling behind 36-24 at 
halftime. LVC tried relentlessly 
to cut the deficit but could only 
manage to equal Dickinson's 44 
second half points. 

Don Hostetler. the game's high 
scorer, led the Dutchmen with 16 
points. Bill Kline added 1? 
points, including four three- 
pointers, while Scott Barlup 
chipped in with 14. 

Men Beat 

by Rick Klenk 

Monday, the Valley heal 
visiting Elizabethtown College. 

The two teams played even un- 
til the 12:04 mark of the first half 
With the score 12-14 in favor ot 
E-Town. LVC went on a 26-I 4 
run to take a 38-26 halftime lead- 
in the second half, however. E- 
town used a tough man-to-mf 1 
defense to cut the lead to 63*$ 
But LVC's Scott Barlup took the 
game into his own hands by s c ° r 
ing the next seven points, g' vin - 
the Dutchmen a 70-59 lead. 

Barlup was the game's leader 
scorer with 22 points, 17 cofl*f 
in the second half. Don Hosted 
playing his usually solid p m \ 
scored 19 points, while Bill Pjj 
added 15. including a 3-4 nV 
from three-point ra "fJ 
Freshman Joe Rilatt also end^ 
up in double figures with 
points. j, 

Lebanon Valley is now r v 
the MAC and 7-13 overall- 

Lip Sync 
Raises $275 

by Toni Salam 

The Sunshine Foundation is a 
national organization that makes 
dreams come true for those 
special children who are critical- 
ly or terminally ill. Last Sunday 
night, students, each with a dollar 
admission fee in hand, showed up 
in full force at Lutz Music Hall 
to watch the Second Annual Lip 
Sync/ Air Band Competition. The 
proceeds from the event will go 
to the local Lebanon County 
Chapter of the Sunshine 

Before the start of the evening's 
competition, John Deamer, Presi- 
dent of the local Chapter of the 
Sunshine Foundation, presented 
certificates of appreciation to last 
year's participants. 

Deamer, who is employed by 
Lebanon Valley's Communica- 
tions Office, stated to the au- 
dience that the Foundation, which 
was founded in 1976 by 
Philadelphia policeman Bill Sam- 
ple, has to date raised over 6 
million dollars to make the 
dreams come true. By this June, 
w ith the help of some newly 
founded chapters in Canada, the 
Foundation hopes to fulfill their 
ten thousandth wish. 

In addition, Deamer also re- 
minded the audience that their 
contribution tonight will stay in 
me local area. 

Mark Phillips, President of the 
lights of the Valley, which 
sponsors the competition, sent out 
Citations to Greek organizations 
°n campus to participate. The on- 
y conditions of entry is that per- 
r °rmers must be members of the 
Or ganization's pledge class and 
must perform a song of their own 
c noice by lip sync. 

Up Syncing, or Air Band as it 
, s sometimes called, is perform- 

§ a recorded song by only mov- 
ng one 's lips and pretending to 

sing it. 

The performers of lip sync are 
judged on three criteria: originali- 
ty, appearance, and lip sync. 
Each category has a maximum of 
ten points, the total score of thir- 
ty being a perfect score. 

The judges of the night's com- 
petition were Dave Calvario, 
Eileen Frankland, Acting Presi- 
dent William McGill, Mark 
Brezitski, Lew Cook, Wendi 
Haldeman, and Charles "Chuck" 
Firestone. The Master of 
Ceremonies was Coach Jim 

To start the competition, last 
year's winners, the 1987 pledge 
class of the Knights of the Valley, 
were called back for an encore 
presentation. Following them 
were the actual participants of 
TKE with "What a Wonderful 
World ', Delphians with "Joy to 
the World", Knights with 
"Respect" and "Old Time Rock 
n' Roll", Gamma Sigma Sigma 
with "Girl for All Seasons", 
KALO with "Walk this 
Way", and CLIO with "Summer 
Nights" and "Walk Like an 

At the end of the night's com- 
petition, the winners were decid- 
ed. Second Runner-up was a tie 
between CLIO's "Walk Like an 
Egyptian" and the Knight's "Old 
Time Rock n' Roll." First 
Runner-up went to CLIO with 
their rendition of "Summer 
Nights." The winners of this 
year's Lip Sync competition were 
the Knights with Aretha 
Franklin's big hit "Respect." 

The winners of the competition 
won a $50 check which will go 
to their fraternity or sorority. 
This year's winners, however, 
gave their award back to the Sun- 
shine Foundation. So altogether, 
the local chapter of the foundation 
received $275 that night. 

Play Review 
See p. 5 

FEBRUARY 25, 1988 

H i 

From left, Young Democrats President John Brenner, Lt. Gen. Mark Singel, Mark Schreiber, Acting 
Pres. William McGill. Photo by Becky Snyder. 

Lt. Governor Featured 
At Democratic Dinner 

by Steve Trapnell 

On Thursday, Feb. 18, the 
Young Democrats sponsored a 
Campaign '88 Dinner which 
featured Pennsylvania 
Lieutenant Governor Mark S. 

The dinner, attended by 
students, faculty, and outside 
guests, was an attempt to increase 
political awareness on the 

In the keynote speech, Singel 
outlined his understanding of the 
position of the Democratic party, 
stating that "we stand for the peo- 
ple who cannot help themselves. ' ' 
He continued that budget cuts 
proposed by Republican ad- 
ministrations would decrease the 
quality of life of everyone, not 

just those people immediately 

Singel also clarified the 
philosophy of the governor's ad- 
ministration, calling it idealistic 
but practical. The Casey/Singel 
administration is attempting to 
achieve new frontiers, while 
realistically dealing with expen- 
ditures and taxes. 

The energetic Lieutenant 
Governor said that, at a time 
when this country has "institu- 
tionalized selfishness," there is 
an obligation that comes with per- 
sonal success. He encouraged 
people to look at the needs of 
others as well as themselves. Ac- 
cording to Singel, "It's good to 
be great in Pennsylvania, but it's 
better to be good." 

Mark Schreiber, Executive 
Director of the Pennsylvania 
Democratic State Committee, 
also spoke at the dinner. 
Schreiber said that he hopes to in- 
spire young Democrats in Penn- 
sylvania, since they are not very 
active. He cited Reagan's propos- 
ed budget cuts in higher educa- 
tion, including Pell Grants, 
guaranteed student loans, and 
work-study, as illustrations of the 
Republicans' lack of support for 
college education. 

Following the Campaign '88 
Dinner, which was hosted by 
sophomore John Brenner, 
everyone was invited to the 
"Underground" to watch the 
Democratic Presidential Debate 
live via satellite from Dallas. 

p. 2 THE QUAD Thursday, February 25, 1988 


Cure The Winter Blahs 

by Christina Weber 

Winter brings with it many wonderful things. O.K., so I lied. 
Probably the only two good things about winter are the basketball 
season and snow. And, I know that not everyone likes those. One 
thing that this time of year also brings is everyone's comments on 
campus apathy. (But, who really cares anyway?) Pointing out the blah 
attitude on this campus is easy. Solving these winter ickies is not so 
easy. That is why I have graciously provided you with helpful tips 
on how to brighten up your life. Take them or leave them, I don't care. 

Tip #1— Do something different. Be outrageous in your plans. Do 
something totally contradictory to your personality. For some this 
might even include attending a class or two. 

Tip#2— Buy something new for your wardrobe. Or better yet, buy 
me something new for my wardrobe. I'm sure we'll all feel better then. 

Tip#3— Change your daily routine. For example, if your usual 
schedule is to go to lunch, take a nap, watch a soap, change it. Watch 
a different soap, go to lunch and then take a nap. Remember variety 
is the spice of life. 

Tip#4— Sit down and come up with a new list of excuses for when 
you miss a class. Just claiming to be ill is boring and no good. You 
must remember to be careful and realistic. Telling your professor that 
the lunar phases have reeked havoc upon hormones and you were 
unable to attend does not work, trust me. 

Tip#5— Play some practical jokes on your friends. Remember April 
Fool's day is quickly coming up and you'll want to be in fine humorous 
form before then. The idea is to come up with new tricks. Taking 
someone's towel from the shower is overdone. Maybe try drilling 
holes in the bottom of all your neighbors 'cup. 

Tip#6— Throw a party for no reason what so ever. Mix a new punch 
(non-alcoholic, of course). Invite some people you don't know very 
well. Invite me. I really don't get out much. 

If these tips don't help you slip out of your cold weather rut, have 
no fear. You'll probably warm up during the spring thaw. 
(SENIORS— 72 days until graduation!) 


The Big Questions 

by Steve Trapnell 

It's that time of year again. It's time for spring break. Those of 
you who read this column regularly (yea, right) may be expecting 
to see a list of possible activities over spring break or something else 
along that line. If you are, you may as well stop reading now, because 
that's not what I've decided to write about. 

What I have decided to present is a list of unanswered questions 
about Lebanon Valley College. So, for those of you who are still 
reading, here goes: 

1. Why do we call spring break spring break? (This, by the way, 
is the only part of the editorial which will deal with spring break). 
This question is an obvious one and has been asked numerous times 
in the past. I'm still wondering, though. It's February. It could still 
snow. What are we doing taking a SPRING break? Does the name 
really matter? Let's face it, a break is much appreciated, no matter 
what it is called. 

2. What are those big hunks of stone outside the lobby of Blair Music 
Center? Yes, we've all heard various explanations about this piece 
of "modern art," but does anyone REALLY know what they repre- 
sent? Maybe each individual student is supposed to decide for himself 
or herself. Maybe it's LVC's version of Stonehenge. In any case, 
this giant stone work of art has become an inseparable part of the 
college, and it would help if everyone knew what it was. 

3. Why are there no windows in Garber Science Center? Okay, 
so maybe there are a few windows, but they're at the stairway, not 
in classrooms. What are they doing in there that they don't want 
anyone to see? Don't misunderstand, I'm sure there's a perfectly good 

explanation for this lack of windows. I'd just like to hear what it is. 

4. Why can you mail a letter across the country more quickly than 
across the campus? Upon returning from Christmas break, I receiv- 
ed a Christmas card through intercampus mail which had been sent 
well before we left. Although the campus mail system often works 
quite well, there are other times that it hardly works at all. I'm sure 
the story behind this mystery would be quite interesting. 

5. Has there ever been a time when all the printers in the library 
computer center have functioned properly? I'm sure almost every stu- 
dent has felt frustrated by a broken or malfunctioning printer. These 
problems are probably caused by a number of factors, including the 
fact that they are often used by students who have no idea what they're 

6. Why does the Administration building seem to have more stairs 
than any other building in the world? Any student who has a class 
on the third floor of this building will know what I'm talking about. 
Enough said there. 

7. Is there anyone still reading this column? If so, maybe you've 
read a question which you can answer. If you're really good, maybe 
you could answer more than one. If you're like me, reading this list 
just made you think of more unanswered questions. If you have an 
answer, or another question, let me know. Write the answer or ques- 
tion down and put it in the QUAD mailbox in the English house (in- 
clude your name and room number). Maybe I'll use it in the QUAD. 
Maybe I'll tear it up into little pieces and forget all about it. There's 
only one way to find out. 

Concert Choir 
Tours During 
Spring Break 

by Sylvia Hay 

Lebanon Valley's Concert 
Choir consists of a dedicated 
group of students who commit 
many hours each semester to 
diligent practice. One of the 
rewards for their hard work is the 
spring tour, which this year goes 
from February 27 to March 11. 
While the rest of us are scraping 
ice off our cars in New Jersey and 
Pennsylvania, the Concert Choir 
will be heading south for break. 

Some of the cities to be visited 
include Washington, D.C.; 
Orlando, Florida; and Lyn- 
chburg, Virginia. The show con- 
sists of a variety of classic choir 
arrangements, some of them writ- 
ten by Bach and Handel. On 
several numbers the LVC 
Chamber Orchestra will accom- 
pany the choir. 

Although many hours of the 
tour are spent driving, practicing, 
and performing, there is still time 
to enjoy visiting new cities and 
warmer climates. This year the 
students are looking forward to a 
day on the beach in St. 
Petersburg, Florida. 

Debbi Rauanheimo, a member 
for the past three years, likes the 
tour because she gets to know the 
other people in the class so well. 
Concert Choir, she explains, is 
not composed strictly of music 
majors but of an extremely varied 
group of students. Dr. Getz has 
led this group for over 25 years, 
demanding top-quality perfor- 
mance. By the time the tour is 
over, the students have learned a 
lot about music and about each 

The Concert Choir will wrap 
up its tour here on campus Sun- 
day, March 13. If you'd like to 
hear the results of their practice, 
come check them out at Lutz 
Hall. All students will be admit- 
ted for $1.50. 


Christina Weber Managing Editor 

Steve Trapnell News Editor 

Dwayne Nichols Layout Editor 

Bryna Vandergrift Sports Editor 

Lisa Camburn Proofreader 

Staff: Rob Andrew, Ian Bonner, Joe Buehler, Chris Craig, Rick Klenk, Christopher Lonie, Mike 
McGranaghan, Doug Nyce, Toni Salam, Lance Shaffer, and Becky Snyder. 

Kathy Johnson Advertising Manager 

Bob Baker Business Manager 

Charlene Shaffer Assistant Business Manager 

Richard Arnold Financial Advisor 

Leon Markowicz Editorial Advisor 

Peterson Opens Sports Center 

On Friday, February 19, 
former LVC President Arthur L. 
Peterson attended an informal 
opening ceremony for the Arnold 
Sports Center. 

Dr. Peterson commented that 
he hoped the center would 
become a place of "intergenera- 
tional sharing" for the college 

community. He said it would p 10 ' 
vide a recreational facility & 
students, faculty, and boatf 

After a brief address, Peterso 11 
swam a lap in the indoor po° ' 
setting the sports center's fi f 

p. 3 THE QUAD Thursday, February 25, 1988 

Break Plans? 

by Ian Bonner 

A few members of the LVC 
community were randomly 
selected and asked what they 
were going to do over the break. 
Whether or not they can be 
believed is beside the point. Let's 
have open ears and open minds: 
Hannelore Vanderhallen: "I'm 
going to find out if the rest of 
America is as boring as Ann- 

Dr. Savvy: "I'm going to at- 
tend a Spring Break seminar in 
Fort Lauderdale to find out what 
really goes on down there." 

Jean Marc Hese: "I'm going to 
Boston to party at some colleges 
and universities." 

Ken Krawchuk: "I'm going 
home to Michigan to lunch with 
Madonna, hit the town with Bob 
Segar and shoot a little hoop 

with Isiah Thomas." 

Tina Weber: "I'm spending all 
my time with Marjy Schubauer 
and traveling with old men in 
recreational vehicles . ' ' 

Howard Bampton: "Clean and 
rearrange my room." 

Angie Fischer: "Going to 
Daytona to drink, sunbathe, 
relax, unwind, go out, buy 
clothes and meet new and exciting 

Delia Sitaras: "I'm going to a 
bar with my cousin to re-acquaint 
ourselves with a guy we met over 
Christmas break at the Bee-Bop." 

Marc Junkerman: "I'm going 
home to hang out and thank God 
that pledging is over." 

Chris Frye: "I'm going to 
observe the Gulf of Mexico and 
play as much golf as possible." 

Young Democrats 
Set Example 

by Rob Andrew 

On Thursday, February 18, the 
Young Democrats of Lebanon 
Valley hosted Lieutentent Gover- 
nor Mark Singel at an open din- 
ner for the campus community. 
The program was well planned 
and very smoothly executed. It 
was even well attended. For their 
efforts, the Young Democrats of 
Lebanon Valley should be 

The Democratic Party of Penn- 
sylvania, heavily represented at 
this dinner, put on a less im- 
pressive show. The primary focus 
of this program was awareness. 
Over sixty percent of college 
students that are registered to vote 
are registered Republican. The 
Democrats, hungry for support, 
are sponsoring the "Carry the 
Torch" program where party 
leaders travel to colleges across 
the state while trying to drum up 
a following. 

Mark Schreiber, Executive 
Director of the Democratic Par- 
ty of Pennsylvania, spoke to the 
crowd in a very forceful manner. 
Realizing he was addressing a 
c °Uegiate audience, he used 
statistics provided by the 
Democratic National Committee 
to inform students that the Reagan 
administration's objective is to 
eliminate and reduce student 
loans and Pell Grants. How 
touching. The flame of "the 
torch" must have flickered when 
* e very next day, the New York 

lr nes, a much less biased source 
han the Democratic National 

ornrnittee, printed a summary of 
pagan's 1989 budget proposal. 

ne top priority for spending in- 
creases, even higher on the list 

than AIDS, is education. The 
budget includes $656 million in 
increases for education with a 
healthy portion of these funds go- 
ing to augment the Pell Grant pro- 
gram. Either the Democratic Par- 
ty of Pennsylvania is terribly ill- 
informed, or, they are attempting 
to capitalize on the fact that col- 
lege students do not read basic 

Mr. Schreiber gave an ex- 
cellent summary of where the 
current administration is at fault. 
This, however, is where 
Schreiber concentrates all of his 
energies. He is quick to tell 
everyone what is wrong but of- 
fers not one iota of productive ad- 
vice. Donald Trump, in his book 
"The Art of the Deal", 
categorizes individuals like this as 
"the world's biggest losers." 
Politics is the vehicle our nation 
uses to find solutions to the pro- 
blems we face. This country was 
made great by people with vision 
for the future, not by individuals 
with blinded hindsight. 

College students are America's 
political future and need to be 
well informed of the facts. The 
Democratic Party's intentions are 
justified by attempting to inform 
as education is the most power- 
ful weapon anyone can posses. 
We need to fathom everything 
from a discriminating perspective 
in order to sort the rhetoric from 
the truth. 

"If a Democratic candidate 
loses the 1988 presidential elec- 
tion, the party does not deserve 
to exist nationally." Remember, 
these are the words of Mark 

The Road Less Traveled By 

The Decline and Fall of the American Empire 

by Christopher Craig 

Among the many intentions of 
this column one is the introduc- 
tion of new ideas or concepts. 
Thus begins this week's humble 
endeavor. Last week's TIME 
magazine featured an interesting 
review of a newly released book 
entitled, The Rise and Fall of the 
Great Powers. This was a piece 
of work by Yale Professor of 
History, Paul Kennedy. Professor 
Kennedy's book is composed of 
two sections; the first reads like 
the typical college freshman's 
Western Civilization text, while 
the second part, entitled "To the 
21st Century," predicts the 
decline and fall of existing na- 
tions. The United States assumes 
the most prominent position of 
this second section. 

Kennedy asserts that all nation- 
empires must fall. The confoun- 
ding elements of global-political 
competition, economic develop- 
ment, technological growth, and 
changing military strength all lead 
to the eventual downfall, or at 
least decline of a single nation's 
dominating influence. Kennedy 
implies that the defeat of the 
Spanish Armada, Napoleon's fall 
at Waterloo, and the decay of the 
Roman Empire were not 
necessary the result of a military 
defeat. Instead they were 

Movie Review 

foregone conclusions resulting 
from a lack of economic 
resources, national will, increas- 
ed foreign powers or deficient 
technological development. 

Kennedy applies this same line 
of reasoning to the future of the 
United States. He maintains that 
"decisionmakers in Washington 
must face the awkward and en- 
during fact that the sum total of 
the United States' global interests 
and obligations are in far larger 
than the country's power to de- 
fend them all at once." The re- 
cent course of events in the 
Middle-East and Central America 
are timely examples of Kennedy's 
thesis. The inability of the current 
presidential administration to suc- 
cessfully address this nation's 
trade and budget deficits, a wan- 
ing military development, an un- 
workable foreign policy and the 
stagnation of the economy serve 
to erode our country's ability to 
shape the events around the 

Kennedy also contends that the 
global community has become in- 
creasingly competitive, thus 
reducing the longstanding in- 
fluence of the super-powers. This 
dilemma that Kennedy portrays 
offers a challenge to tomorrow 
leaders. The inevitable decline of 
all nation-empires can be an easy 

transition, or it can assume swift 
and harsh consequences. With 
this in mind, the selection of our 
nation's leaders assumes a greater 
significance. As a people we must 
not allow our nation to have 
another president who is wonder- 
fully portrayed on television, but 
has no means to effectively lead 
the nation. Kennedy argues, "it 
simply has not been given to any 
one society to remain PER- 
MANENTLY ahead of all the 
others. The only serious threat to 
the real interests of the United 
States can come from a failure to 
adjust sensibly to the newer world 

This is the prophecy of the 
future of the United States. One 
can easily view the remains of the 
Pyramids of Egypt, the rubble of 
the Greek ruins, or the battlefield 
of the European nations, but all 
represent disappeared empires 
that once flourished. This sober- 
ing reality can only be greeted 
with intelligent understanding. 
Our leaders' ability to understand 
Kennedy's writings can very well 
determine the survival of our 
"American Empire", and the 
degree to which leadership can 
sensibly adjust to the "decline 
and fall of the American Em- 

A Vietnam Comedy 

by Mike McGranaghan 

During the past two years, 
there have been many movies 
made about Vietnam. All of them 
have dealt very seriously with the 
horror American troops faced 
during the war. Now, there is a 
comedy about Vietnam and, to 
me, it is almost as effective as 

It's called "Good Morning 
Vietnam" and it stars Robin 
Williams as Armed Forces Radio 
disc jockey Adrian Cronauer. He 
arrives in Saigon in 1965, just as 
American involvement in the war 
was beginning. On the air, he 
spews forth tons of irreverent 
material, making fun of everyone 
from Lyndon Johnson to Gomer 

His superior officers are not 
pleased with his broadcasts. They 
prefer he read official news and 
play Lawrence Welk records. 
Cronauer prefers to make up his 
own news and play James Brown. 

When he's not battling the 
brass, Cronauer is learning quick- 
ly that war is hell. When two 

American soldiers are killed in an 
explosion, the story is censored 
by his superiors. One of his Viet- 
namese friends turns out to be the 
enemy. And each day, more and 
more troops are being sent to the 
front line. 

The film follows Cronauer 
through his endless stream of 
hardships. But the movie makes 
its statements in between laughs. 
Much of "Good Morning Viet- 
nam" deals with Cronauer' s 
radio antics. William's brilliant 
improvisational broadcasts are 
guaranteed to have you rolling on 
the floor. He conducts fake inter- 
views with men on the field and 
phony fashion designers who 
urge soldiers in combat to wear 
bright colors so they clash. He 
reads a fake newscast claiming 
Ethel Merman jammed Russian 
radar by singing (yes, it has to be 
seen to be believed). He even im- 
itates Walter Cronkite giving an 
obscene weather report. 

But most of all, he makes the 
men in the field forget the war 

around them. At one point, he 
entertains some troops stranded 
on a truck, waiting to go to the 
front line. The scene is both 
hilarious and touching, as 
Cronauer knows he must be 
funny even though he is aware of 
the tragedy the men face, 

Robin Williams is absolutely 
perfect in this role. He gives one 
of the truly great comedic perfor- 
mances of the decade. He also 
proves to be a capable actor mak- 
ing us care about his character. 
His friendships with other disc 
jockeys and a local class of Viet- 
namese students are nice touches 
to a powerful film. 

But most of all, the movie is 
hysterical. And William's perfor- 
mance is so accurate that it will 
make you think while you're 
laughing. "Good Morning Viet- 
nam" is not only one of the year's 
best movies, it is one of the best 
movies I have ever seen. 
(**** out of four) 
NOTE: Robin Williams was 
recently nominated as Best Actor 
for his work in this film. 

p. 4 THE QUAD Thursday, February 25, 1988 

Coke VP 

by Rob Andrew 

Willem Wessermen, Vice- 
President of International 
Marketing for the Coca-Cola 
Corporation, discussed marketing 
Coke around the world in the Lit- 
tle Theater on Tuesday, February 

Wessermen lectured on the 
diverse management structures 
and techniques used to market a 
single "non-essential" product 
consistently in a hundred and 
fifty-five different countries. 
Wessermen, who works out of 
Atlanta, Georgia, began his 
career with Coke in 1951 in 
England as a route salesman . 

Coke, a nine billion dollar 
company holding forty percent of 
the soft drink market and employ- 
ing 25,000 people, relies heavily 
on advertising to sell its products. 
Wessermen concluded by show- 
ing several different versions of 
popular commercials as they 
were adapted to be shown in dif- 
ferent countries. 

This lecture is part of The 
Springer Lecture Series which is 
underwritten by Fred J. Springer 
and the IBM Corporation. 
Springer's daughter graduated 
from Lebanon Valley College in 

Campus Leaders 
Need Vital Concepts 

by Doug Nyce 

Being the leader of a campus 
organization can be a difficult 
job. Relatively few persons 
recognize the amount of skills and 
abilities necessary for the suc- 
cessful completion of such a 
responsibility. Looking at the 
leaders that exist in such 
organizations presently, one finds 
an immense amount of diversity 
relative to leadership styles or 
lack of same. 

Often, a person in a position of 
leadership on a college campus 
will find himself/herself bound up 
in the popular notion of the 
American leader. Notice that the 
popular notion is far from the 
ideal. The popular leader in 
America today is not the 
benevolent, kind, visionary, in- 
tellectual, openminded public ser- 
vant that the American heritage 
holds up as ideal. In the 1980's, 
leadership in America has 
become close to an unquestioned 
dictator-like style. The eight 
years of the "rule of Reagan" 
stands in testament to this 
phenomenon. Leadership in cam- 
pus organizations can be a 
microcosm of this style. Those 
organizations that do suffer this 
fate will find themselves wrapped 
in a blanket of unresolved con- 
flict, tied up with a rope of 
disorganization and with a knot of 
ambiguous purpose. This can be 
due to the autocratic attitude of 
the individual "at the top" as 
much as it can be due to the 
apathetic attitude of the people 
"at the bottom." 

A leader of a club, fraternity, 
sorority, or other campus 
organization needs to find three 
concepts governing their adminis- 
tration. One, they are the organi- 
zer and delegator of respon- 

sibilities, and must follow 
through in the checking up on the 
progress of the various activities. 
In this organization and delega- 
tion, they must be careful not to 
tell others what to do, but rather 
to reach an understanding with 
the task people that their purpose 
is the achievement of great things 
for their organization. How does 
one achieve great things? By 
fulfilling responsibilities in the 
most progressive manner possi- 
ble. The second concept is vision. 
A leader must be visionary, not 
that they form the vision for the 
group, but rather, they focus the 
vision that is already there. A 
leader must be an idea-person, 
full of energy and imagination. 
The third concept is the most im- 
portant, service. To be a great 
leader, one must first and 
foremost be a servant. Those who 
wish to lead from an ivory tower, 
removed from the heartbeat of an 
organization, will most assured- 
ly fail. One must serve those who 
are part of the organization before 
that organization will feel oblig- 
ed to serve. Leaders command 
respect only if they are found 
worthy of it. 

Leadership positions are thus 
very demanding, yet extremely 
satisfying. The enjoyment comes 
not only in the accomplishment of 
a task, but also in the joining of 
humanity in the pursuit of a com- 
mon goal. In the end, aren't we 
all leaders? We lead ourselves in 
all that we may call our lives. Our 
existence is an expression of how 
well we manage, supervise, and 
lead our lives. So, take a look at 
yourself. Are you accepting the 
challenge of great leadership of 
yourself? If so, then maybe it's 
time to look beyond the self and 
become a leader of others as well. 

The most 
exciting few hours 
you'll spend 
all week. 

Run. Climb. Rappel. Navigate. 
Lead. And develop the 
confidence and skills you won't 
get from a textbook. Enroll 
in Army ROTC as one 
of your electives. Get the facts 
today. BE ALL YOU CAN BE. 

For more information 
contact Capt. Dabrowski 
(call collect) 


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by Doug Nyce 

This semester, LVC witnessed 
the founding of the first in 
residence trombone quartet in the 
nation, on its own campus. The 
quartet is made up of two LVC 
faculty, and two former LVC 
students. James Erdman, II is the 
founder of the Quartet and the 
trombone instructor at the col- 
lege. The other three members 
are Ronald Garman, Robert 
Hearson, and Stephen Shiffer. 
The staff arrangers for the group 
are Tom Strohman and Rod 
Miller, both LVC graduates. 

The original idea for the quartet 
stemmed from the experiences of 
James Erdman, II as the principal 
trombonist and soloist in the 
Marine Band. Each Christmas at 
the White House, the Trom- 
bonists of the band would form a 
quartet to play carols. Mr. Erd- 
man says they never played the 
same carol twice. Upon retire- 
ment from the band in 1976 after 
twenty years of service, Mr. Erd- 
man settled down in the area. He 
soon found that there was little to 
do as a trombonist in this area, so 
he founded a group of 13 trom- 
bonists, called Die Posaunen (The 
Trombones). The members lived 
in the local area and played most- 
ly for fun. Unfortunately, the 
rehearsal time became a bit much 
for some of the members, and the 
novelty of the group wore off. In 
1986, after five years, the group 
dissolved. Three months later, 
Erdman was back, founding this 
quartet, intending it to be just for 

What was initially "just for 
fun" is now the official quartet in 
residence of LVC, Die Posaunen. 
Erdman went to the chairman of 
the music department with the 
idea for the quartet and found him 
to be highly enthusiastic about the 
idea; the administration of the 
college was just as supportive, 
especially Dr. McGill and Dean 
Stanson. Thus, Die Posaunen is 
a reality, giving their premier 
concert this past week to an en- 
thusiastic crowd of supporters in 
Lutz Hall of Blair Music Center. 
The quartet will now serve as a 
visible means of exposure for the 
college, giving concerts in the m 1 ' 
mediate area and throughout the 

country. A demonstration tape 


the quartet will be available this 
summer as well as a tape of tn e 
first concert. 

p. 5 THE QUAD Thursday, February 25, 1988 

Leadership Scholars 
Sought By LVC 

by Toni Salam 
On January 16, 18, and 23, 
1988, Lebanon Valley College 
sought 30 high school seniors to 
be next year's Presidential 
Leadership Scholars. Most of us 
here at the Valley are familiar 
with this program. We have 
either applied for this scholarship 
or have been lucky enough to 
have received a scholarship. So 
seeing all the eager high school 
seniors, we can say that we can 
remember well those agonizing 

The process of finding the 
Leadership Scholar started with 
the Admissions Office. Under the 
direction of Ronald Good, 
posters were sent to various high 
schools in the local and out of 
state areas. In addition, flyers 
were mailed to all the seniors on 
the college's mailing list. Par- 
ticipants who replied came from 
the Pennsylvania, New Jersey, 
Maryland, New York, Connec- 
ticut, Delaware and Maine. 

The minimum qualifications 
for this year's scholarship was 
high school senior status; leader- 
ship achievement in high school 
student government, art, 
athletics, drama, debate or music; 
leadership achievement in one's 
community; commitment to ac- 
cepting campus leadership role as 
a dormitory resident; rank in the 
top 40 percent of high school 
graduating class; a combined 
SAT score of 1000 or higher and 
demonstrated academic 

The most crucial part of the 
Process of choosing the Scholar 
■sthe interview session. This year 

interviews were done on a divi- 
sional basis. The six divisions 
were Science, Social Science, 
Humanities, Management, Music 
and Mathematics. Each division 
individually decides on the actual 
interview process based on some 
general guidelines. In the inter- 
view, they look for personality, 
reasons for motivation and 
leadership potential. 

After the interviews, each divi- 
sion provides a rank of order of 
the candidates. These recommen- 
dations are then handed over to 
the three men selection commit- 
tee of the Acting President 
McGill, Dean Marquette of Stu- 
dent Affairs, and Warren Thomp- 
son, Director of the Leadership 
Studies Program. It will take 
them at least 13 hours to choose 
the 30 finalists and 30 alternates 
according to placement of rank 
and individual records. 

Each division is guaranteed at 
least two winners; however, after 
two are chosen in each division, 
potential major is no longer a 
basis for selection. Further selec- 
tion is made solely on the grounds 
of individual achievement. 

This year 412 seniors 
registered for the scholarship. 
277 were interviewed. This is an 
increase from the previous years 
of 240 interviewed in 1987 and 
215 in 1986. 

Recipients will be notified no 
later than March 1. They will 
have until April 15 to either ac- 
cept or decline the scholarship. 

Then in the fall, Lebanon 
Valley will once again be in- 
troduced to a new batch of 
Leadership Scholars. 

WLVC Dreams 
Of Going FM 

b y Toni Salam 

WLVC has a dream. The cur- 
rently low-frequency AM station 
w hose main audience is the cam- 
pus community has a long term 
§ 0a l of becoming an FM 

According to WLVC President 
M . lke McGranaghan, being FM 
enable WLVC to be able to 
^ eac . n a larger audience by broad- 
asting over a 5 to 10 mile radius. 
n addition, the quality of the 
r °adcast signal will no doubt be 
W LVC will need $750 to in- 

fm 6 t0 see if a fre( i uenc y on the 

M b and is available. This in- 

quiry will take at the most six 
months. Also, the campus station 
would like to acquire their own 
transmitter tower or rent tower 
space from local stations. The lat- 
ter will be more feasible and cost 

The collegiate station is now in 
the process of raising funds to at- 
tain their goal. As fund raising 
devices, they have sold their juke 
box, will plan to sponsor the 
Underground, and will participate 
in the Spring Arts Festival. 

WLVC's dream may well be 
realized as soon as the Fall of 
1989 if all goes according to plan. 
We wish you luck, WLVC! 




by Ian Bonner 

Lebanon Valley College 
celebrated its ninth annual 
Founder's Day on Tuesday, 
February 23rd. Ceremonies took 
place in the Miller Chapel in 
which the Founder's Day award 
was presented to Lois Lehrman 
Grass, for her outstanding 
achievements in social work, 
leadership and education. 

Grass, from Harrisburg, is 
well-known for her personal 
dedication to volunteerism. She 
has been involved in a multitude 
of Harrisburg-area organizations, 
from health-care institutions to 
groups that promote the arts. She 
was also involved in the "Jewish 
Meals on Wheels" campaign dur- 
ing the Harrisburg flood of 1972 
to provide senior citizens with 
food meeting Jewish dietary laws. 
She has also served other 
organizations in the area, in- 
cluding the Hamilton Health 
Center, Neighborhood Day Care 
Center and Tri-County Council 
on Alcoholism. 

The Founder's Day award is 
presented each year to a member 
of the outside community, not 
connected with Lebanon Valley 
College, for "unselfish and 
unusual community service in 
founding avenues leading to the 

Dr. Bernard C. Watson, presi- 
dent and CEO of the William 
Penn Foundation in Philadelphia, 
was the guest speaker. The topic 
of Watson's address was "The 
Social Context of Philanthropy: 
Values, Needs, Respon- 

According to Dr. Howard Ap- 
plegate, Chairman of the 
Founder's Day Committee, the 
award has been presented for 
several years, but only over the 
last eight years has it been given 
with a formal ceremony. Grass is 
the second of nine women to 
receive the honor since 1980. 

LVC president William J. 
McGill noted that there was a ma- 
jor connection between LVC's 
nationally regarded Leadership 
Studies Program for 
undergraduates and the LVC 
Founder's Day award. 


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Play Review 

"A Thousand Clowns" 

by Mike McGranaghan 

The recent production of Herb 
Gardner's "A Thousand 
Clowns" here on campus took 
me by surprise. When I entered 
the Little Theater, I didn't know 
what to expect. I had never heard 
of the play, but was sure that it 
would be at least pretty good. 
That was an understatement. The 
play was hysterically funny in 
parts, poignant, and extremely 
well acted. 

It is the story of Murray Burns 
(played to perfection by Bill 
Snelling), an unemployed com- 
edy writer who has custody of his 
nephew, Nick (Kelly Green). 
Despite Nick's proddings, Mur- 
ray refuses to look for a job, 
prefering to go to the Statue of 
Liberty one more time. One day, 
an uptight social worker (David 
Andrews) and a psychologist 
(Katherine Henry) pay a visit to 
Murray's cluttered apartment. 
They inform him that if he does 
not soon find work, he will lose 

Murray goes to see his sister 
Abagail (Sue Toland) who con- 
vinces him to take his old job 
back. That job was writing com- 
edy for an obnoxious television 
kids' show host named Chuckles 
the Chipmunk (Ken Krawchuck). 
Murray certainly doesn't want to 
go back to working for Chuckles, 
but he doesn't want Nick to be 
taken away, either. Slowly he 
learns to accept responsibility and 
make an adult choice. 

Bill Snelling was just right as 
Murray Burnes. He effectively 
captured the sarcastic attitude that 
makes Murray such a likable pro- 
tagonist. He also interacted well 
with Kelly Green, who had the 
difficult task of playing the op- 
posite sex. She did it sucessful- 
ly, always making the audience 
believe that she was a twelve year 
old boy. 

The supporting performances 
were good, too. Katherine Henry 

brought the proper amount ot 
humor and sexiness to her role of 
the psychologist who becomes 
Murray's lover. This was her first 
LVC production, and you can bet 
you'll see her again soon. 

Sue Toland was very convinc- 
ing as Abagail. She slowly forces 
Murray to face maturity. This is 
a particularly demanding role, 
since she gradually grows more 
and more angry at him until she 
finally explodes. 

Ken Krawchuck was very well 
cast as Leo Herman a.k.a. 
"Chuckles." He made his 
character a jerk without ever los- 
ing the sympathy of the audience. 
He knows he's a jerk, but he's too 
busy trying to make kids happy 
to do anything about it. 

But as good as all these perfor- 
mances were (and they were ex- 
cellent), David Andrews nearly 
stole the show as the stuffy social 
worker. His speech and man- 
nerisms had the audience in 
hysterics. It was a great comedic 
supporting performance. 

Since this is a review, I feel that 
I should point out something that 
went wrong, or just didn't work. 
But in all honesty, I can't think 
of a thing about the play that I 
didn't like. It was that good. The 
actors were enjoyable, and Dr. 
John Kearney did a nice direc- 
torial job. If you missed "A 
Thousand Clowns," you missed 
what is surely one of the best 
plays ever to be put on the LVC 

Here's a look at those behind 
the scenes: Director: Dr. John 
Kearney; Producer/Costumes: 
Tara L. Thomas; Set Design: 
Kenneth Miller; Lighting Design: 
Jennifer Lord and M. Brent Tros- 
tle; Stage Manager: Kathleen 
Ryan; Make-up: Laurie Devine; 
Stage Crew: Bill Adams, Kelly 
Snyder and Cathie Wheeler; Set 
Construction: David Andrews, 
Matt Guenther and Doug Nyce; 
Props Mistress: Sue Toland. 


27 East Main St. 
Annville, PA 

Free Delivery 
for College 

p. 6 THE QUAD Thursday, February 25, 1988 

Season Ends For B-Ball 

by Rick Klenk 

Recently, Lebanon Valley's 
men's basketball team ended their 
season with home losses to 
Gettysburg College, 87-77, and 
Franklin and Marshall College, 

On Thursday, the Valley lost a 
tough game to Gettysburg mainly 
because of the shooting of Brian 
Townes. Townes ended the game 
with a game-high 32 points. 

The Dutchmen did play a good 
game, putting eight players in the 
scoring column. Bill Kline lead 
the way with 18 points and four 
treys. Don Hostetler (15 points), 
Len Bolinsky (14), and Scott 
Barlup (11) also ended up in 
double figures. 

Saturday was "Hot Dog" 
Frank night at LVC, and the 
Dutchmen did not disappoint the 
large crowd on hand. Although 
the Valley lost 78-69, the game 
was close throughout and the 

nationally ranked Diplomats of 
F & M did not run away with an 
easy victory. 

With 1 1 minutes remaining, 
LVC was down 64^6. However, 
Coach Gordie Foster strategically 
used a triangle-and-two defense 
to shutdown the Diplomats. A 
19-6 run pulled the Dutchmen 
within four with 4:30 left, 71-67, 
but six costly turnovers in the last 
four minutes were too much to 

Hostetler, who along with Len 
Bolinsky and Wes Soto ended 
their fine careers here against 
F & M, took game-high scoring 
honors with 21 points. Ron 
Fevola added 15 points while 
Kline and Bolinsky both chipped 
in with 9 apiece. 

LVC ended the season with a 
3-10 record in the Middle 
Atlantic Conference and 9-16 


Knights 5-0 
ChickenHawks 4-1 
Residents 2-1 
KALO 3-2 
Knuckleheads 3-2 
TKE 3-2 
APO 1-4 
PHILO 1-5 
FCA 0-5 


Knights 49 Residents 29 
Knights 50 Knuckleheads 35 
Knights 100 PHILO 20 
ChickenHawks 66 APO 24 
ChickenHawks 52 FCA 38 
ChickenHawks 72 KALO 53 
KALO 56 TKE 49 
KALO 63 APO 28 ' 
Knuckleheads 60 FCA 24 
Knuckleheads 75 PHILO 24 
TKE 69 PHILO 46 
TKE 80 APO 26 
APO 42 FCA 38 

Lecture To 
Be Given By 
Children's Author 

The Childhood Education Club 
will sponsor a speaker on Tues 
day, March 8 at 7p.m. in Blair 

Mrs. Sherry Kalbach will be 
presenting the lecture. Kalbach is 
a children's creative author and 
lecturer. Everyone is welcome! 

New Look For Underground 

by Lisa Camburn 

If you haven't been to the 
Underground yet this semester, 
you may be in for a surprise. 
Renovations for our on-campus 
pub have already started. During 
semester break, a new carpet was 
installed, angled at a different 

According to Chuck Rusconi, 
there are many plans for a com- 
plete renovation of the Under- 
ground. Some of the ideas the 
Steering Committee has come up 
with are expanding the dimen- 
sions of the dance floor, moving 
the DJ booth to a different cor- 
ner, extending lights around the 
mirror, and adding strobe lights 

to the columns. 

The committee also hopes to 
repaint, getting rid of the dull 
colors, and brightening it up. 
Rusconi remarked, "The Under- 
ground has been around for about 
three years, and it's getting hum- 
drum. I'd like to see it become 
kind of like a club you might see 
in Boston or New York City." 

Because of the money invol- 
ved, the renovation will be a 
gradual process, but new lights 
will be added by the time students 
get back from spring break, and 
plans to put in a new dance floor 
are already in process. Renova- 
tions expect to be completed by 
the beginning of fall semester. 

Rusconi explained that one of 
the reasons for the renovation is 
to bring more people to the 
Underground. "In order to get 
more interest, we'll be having a 
drawing every Friday or Saturday 
night, where students can win a 
record, cassette or CD of their 
choice." Another reason for the 
renovation is to get more people 
on the Steering Committee staff. 
Rusconi mentioned that the Steer- 
ing Committee has increased in 
numbers since the renovations 

The Steering Committee meets 
on Tuesday nights from 6:30 to 
7:00. All students are welcome to 
attend meetings. 

Wrestlers Go Out 
With Victory 

by Joe Buehler 

For the season finale the 
Lebanon Valley wrestlers wanted 
a victory at home to carry them 
into next year. On Saturday, Feb. 
20, the Dutchmen achieved their 
goal by out wrestling MAC rival, 
Albright, 32-8. 

Although Lebanon received 3 
forfeits and the 118 lb. weight 
class was eliminated there were 
six very good matches. The three 
Dutchmen wrestlers who won by 
forfeit were Jeff Randazzo( 126), 
John Wargins (167), and Mike 
Rusen (177). At the 134 lb. class 
Ben Deardorf overcame Dave 
Blascak of Albright, by a score of 
10-9. At 142 Rod Kalbach was 
impressive as he beat Albright's 
captain ,Eric Newman. Winning 
the match 2-0 was sweet revenge 
for Kalbach. In the Lebanon 
Valley Tournament it was 

Newman who pinned Kalbach 
Lebanon Valley's Glenn Lostrit- 
to came from behind to tie his op- 
ponent 1-1. Dropping to 158, p at 
Eckman pinned his opponent in 
the first period. Closing out the 
match for the Dutchmen were 
Doug Walter and Jeff Gruber 
They both wrestled hard, but 
were unable to overcome their 
Albright opponents. 

Ending the Season with a 3-19 
record is not very impressive, but 
due to injuries, lack of numbers 
and team inexperience no one can 
look down at the Dutchmen and 
their efforts. Coach Jerry 
Petrofes is a winner and he 
coaches his wrestlers to have the 
same attitude. There is no doubt 
in any Dutchmen wrestler's mind 
that Lebanon Valley will be back 
next season contending for the 
MAC title. 

Baseball Team 
Heads To Florida 

For the third consecutive 
year the Lebanon Valley 
College baseball team will be 
spending its spring break in 
Florida. They will be leaving 
on Friday, February 26 at 
4 p.m. and will arrive in 
Cocoa, Florida on Saturday 

afternoon. The team will be 
playing twelve games in a 
seven day span until the 
following Saturday and will 
then return home. Last season 
the team went 6-3 in Florida. 
This year the team hopes to 
equal, if not better, that mark. 



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by Sylvia Hay 

The LVC Concert Choir arriv- 
ed on campus on Wednesday, 
March 9, a few days after the rest 
of us had settled into the post- 
break routine. 

"How was tour?" I asked 
several members, as they hurried- 
ly plugged in their TVs and 
refrigerators and determinedly 
cracked open their textbooks. 
"Oh, it was great," was the most 
common response. "It was a lot 
of fun." 

At first I was taken aback by 
their collective enthusiasm. These 
People had just been bused 
around the country for twelve 
da ys, shuffled into houses and 
churches in a fairly frantic 
fashion. Now they were several 
days behind in their other 
classes-and all this for a one- 
credit course. But no one was 

w hat was "great?" Was the 
feather nice? Did they relax on 
th e beach? Well, not exactly. The 
father was warm, but it rained 
at beach. 

D ^hat was the appeal? I asked 
r - Getz, the choir's director for 


past 27 years, what he thinks 
" ls students get out of the tour. 
a e ^swered that the challenge is 
major element. There is a lot of 
^faction, he explains, in each 
rson's performing to the very 
hou ° f hiS abilit y- After countless 
tice^ ° f concentration and prac- 
com' the choir is able t0 trul y 
th^unicate t0 the audience 
^ u 8h the music. 
Mltz y Unkous, a sophomore, 

agrees. She cites the amount of 
understanding about music she 
has gained over tour and 
describes the sensation of perfor- 
ming these songs as "an incredi- 
ble feeling... There's nothing else 
like it." 

Freshman Heidi Walter pro- 
claimed her pride in belonging to 
such a talented group. The pace 
during the tour was hectic, she 
admits. It did not constitute a 
relaxing break, but it was a real- 
ly rewarding one. 

Well, all right... but was there 
more to the tour than achieving 
musical excellence? "Yes," con- 
cluded both Dr. Getz and the 
students. For one thing, the 
students got a paid trip to various 
parts of the country that they had 
never seen before. By staying 
with local host families, they ex- 
perienced cultural differences 
firsthand and formed worthwhile 
friendships. Former LVC Presi- 
dent Arthur Peterson attended 
their concert in St. Petersburg, 
FL, and they met alumni all along 
the way. 

Of course, friendships within 
the choir were strengthened, too. 
As Linkous put it, "When you're 
with 65 people for 12 days, you 
really get to know them." To 
pass long hours on bus rides, the 
students talked and laughed, 
played Trivial Pursuit and con- 
sumed large amounts of chicken 
and iced tea. Several of them had 
"radio shows" on the buses to 
provide a "soundtrack" for the 

To Vote 
See p. 4 

MARCH 17, 1988 

Concert Choir 
Finds Tour 

Conwell & Young Rumblers 
Perform Here March 27 

By Ian Bonner 

Mark your calendars for the 
hottest entertainment event of the 
school year: Sunday, March 27, 
at 6:30 p.m., Lynch Gymnasium. 
Tommy Conwell and the Young 
Rumblers will bring the house 
down in this rock and roll spec- 
tacle which is sure to leave its 
mark on the Valley. 

Tommy Conwell formed his 

band in early 1984 and since then 
has become a sensation in the 
Mid-Atlantic music scene, filling 
nightclubs to capacity and dazzl- 
ing their audiences. Their debut 
album, WALKIN' ON THE 
WATER, was released in 1986 
on Antenna Records and they are 
currently in the studio under con- 
tract with Columbia Records. 
New additions to the band in- 

clude Rob Miller (formerly of the 
Hooters) and Chris Day (former- 
ly of the John Alexander Band). 

There will be an opening act, 
The Ocean Blue, a local band 
from the Harrisburg area. Tickets 
are on sale at the College Center 
desk at a cost of $4.00 for 
students and $8.00 to the public. 
The show is co-sponsored by 
Q106, the Superstation. 

p. 2 THE QUAD Thursday, March 17, 1988 


Write Me, Please 

by Christina Weber 

We have been through a semester and a half of school, and just 
about every two weeks you people read my thoughts and feelings on 
a plethora of interesting and thought provoking topics. Not once have 
T received a "Letter to the Editor. " Does everyone believe everything 
I say? Or better yet, everything all the other editorialists print? 
What's the matter with you people; are you crazy? Doesn't Chris Craig 
make you the slightest bit angry? Are you perchance brain dead? 

I suppose that you fully believe and stand behind everything the 
administration does. They read this paper too. What an excellent way 
to let them know that you think the job they are doing stinks and the 
policies they are creating and enforcing are unfair. I don't want you 
to think that I am begging, but I am. 

So, you don't have the time to sit down, grab a piece of paper and 
express your personal views on the happenings on this campus. I don't 

buy that; where do you think I find the time? Even if you did write 
something, it would no doubt be out of your way to address an 
envelope and drop it in intercampus mail. Lucky you! I have an 
answer. Bring your wondrous letter with you to dinner, and give it 
to me there. I sit in the far left corner with a bunch of loud girls. 
You can't miss us. Just ask for me, and surely you shall be directed. 

What is your excuse now you bunch of lazy, mindless zombies? 
Write a letter. Tell me I'm stupid (God knows, it won't be the first 
time.) Rejoice in jubilation over the best and newest excuse for 
procrastination— the sports center. Seethe over the fact that it is March, 
and we still have no president. Wonder over the fact that Mary Green 
is now Mary Pink with aqua colored floors. Fume over the fact that 
one of the editorials has deeply offended your political and moral 
beliefs. Just write a letter, please. (ATTENTION SENIORS: 52 days 
left until that momentous occasion. And I don't mean the Stroh's trip.) 


America's Fitness College 

by Steve Trapnell 

First of all, don't get me wrong. I like the sports center. Not only 
is it an attractive addition to the college's battery of buildings, it serves 
a valuable purpose. After all, we can now enjoy a pool, an indoor 
track, and more racquetball courts. In fact, it would probably be dif- 
ficult to come up with a single bad side of the sports center. If anyone 
could, however, it would be me. As it turns out, it took me a few 
weeks, but I've finally discovered the one negative aspect of our 
newest building. 

It could well be the academic downfall of this college. 

During the past few weeks, I have heard a great number of students 
comment that they should probably study, but instead, they have decid- 
ed to do a few laps in the pool, shoot a few hoops, or drag themselves 
around the track. Believe me, I think this is great. Fitness is an im- 
portant part of everyone's life. The potential problem lies not in the 
use of the sports center, but in its abuse. Let me illustrate with a sim- 
ple example. 

Suppose that tomorrow, you have an exam in your least favorite 
subject. You haven't begun to study. In fact, you're not even sure 
what the exam is about. Is this beginning to sound familiar to anyone? 
Okay, now, since your exam is tomorrow, you have a decision to 
make. As I see it, you have the following options: 

1 . You could go back to your room, drag out your books, and spend 
the rest of the evening cramming for a test which you may fail anyway. 

2. You could go to the sports center to jog on a brand new track, 
swim in a climate controlled pool, and play racquetball in a shiny 
new court. 

3. You could finish reading this editorial and then continue reading 
the other fascinating articles in this latest issue of the QUAD. 

I think it should be obvious to all students that the sports center 
is a powerful temptation for students not to study. I can understand 
this. In fact, I once heard a student refer to the center as "the best 
excuse not to study." 

My first reaction to this new situation was to consider urging the 
college to demolish the center immediately. Soon after voicing this 
opinion, I realized that public sentiment was against me. I began to 
fear for my safety and decided to modify my views. 

My second plan, a nightly pool-side study group, never got off the 
ground. I'm not sure why, but it may have had something to do with 
everyone's textbooks getting wet. 

My third idea was to require students to answer a Trivial Pursuit 
question every time they wanted to enter the sports center. I think 
this request is still tied up in a committee somewhere. 

In the end, of course, I realized that I had only one choice. I'm 
a firm advocate of the old expression that if you can't beat them, join 
them. That's why I am now asking the college to change its motto 
to Lebanon Valley College: America's Fitness College. 

Career Help 

by Steve Trapnell 

The college Career Planning 
and Placement Office recently ac- 
quired a new computer program 
which provides personalized 
career guidance in a series of 

Mr. Dave Evans, director, 
commented that the computer 
could be used to help select a ma- 
jor as well as learn about a career. 

The new system, called Sigi 
Plus, is set up in nine sections, so 
that the user can go through the 
entire career decision process or 
use only the parts of the process 
that he needs. The introduction 
section gives an overview of the 
entire system and explains the 
keys needed to run through the 

The system allows students to 
create a personalized list of oc- 
cupations that fits their own 
values. It can then provide infor- 
mation about the occupations on 
the list. The information provid- 
ed includes skills needed in the 
occupation, education and 
preparation for the career. 

Information on coping with 
problems in financing education, 
managing time, and other areas is 
also available. Another aspect of 
the program allows students to 
evaluate their career choices. The 
final section establishes short 
range goals for the student to 

The Sigi Plus system allows the 
college to enter local information 
about occupations. Evans said 
that the information of careers, 
including salaries, is fairly 
realistic and up-to-date. 

According to Evans, the com- 
puter is easy to use. Students do 
not need prior experience with 
computers to operate the system. 
To use the system, students can 
call extensions 235 or 237 to 
reserve an hour. It will also be 
available by appointment during 
the evenings and on weekends 
There is no charge for students 
and alumni of the college to use 
the system. 


Christina Weber Managing Editor 

Steve Trapnell News Editor 

Dwayne Nichols Layout Editor 

Bryna Vandergrift Sports Editor 

Lisa Camburn Proofreader 

Staff: Rob Andrew, Ian Bonner, Martha Bordic, Chris Craig, Sylvia Hay, Rick Klenk, Christopher 
Lonie, Mike McGranaghan, Doug Nyce, Toni Salam, Lance Shaffer, and Becky Snyder. 

Kathy Johnson Advertising Manager 

Bob Baker Business Manager 

Charlene Shaffer Assistant Business Manager 

Richard Arnold Financial Advisor 

Leon Markowicz Editorial Advisor 

LVC Stood Up 
By Earl Reed 

The Student Council will pre- 
sent stand-up comedian Earl Reed 
on Thursday, March 24 in the 

Reed has headlined at over 100 
colleges and more than 50 com- 
edy clubs throughout the United 
States and Canada during the past 

three years. In addition, he has 
worked with such artists as 
Whitney Houston, Chaka Kahn, 
and Kool and the Gang. 

The performance will begin i 
8:30 p.m. in the Underground 
and is free of charge to all 

p. 3 THE QUAD Thursday, March 17, 1988 

Movie Review 

Cher, Pryor, Poitier 

by Mike McGranaghan 

The Academy Awards are 
coming up next month, and one 
of the films up for Best Picture is 
"Moonstruck." It stars Cher as 
an Italian widow living in Brook- 
lyn with her family. One evening 
at a fancy restaurant, her boy- 
friend (Danny Aiello) asks her to 
marry him. She doesn't love him, 
but agrees anyway. 

Then she meets his brother 
(Nicholas Cage) who is living in 
a world of self-pity. They im- 
mediately fall in love (and in 
bed), and Cher is left with a dif- 
ficult decision: should she be with 
the one she loves, or should she 
keep her promise and marry the 

There is a lot of comic poten- 
tial in this situation, and 
"Moonstruck" takes advantage 
of it. There are many clever plot 
twists which surprised and 
delighted me. The supporting 
characters are very amusing and 
the leads are perfect. Cher has 
been good in other movies (most 
notably "Mask" and "The Wit- 
ches of Eastwick"), but this is her 
best performance to date. She just 
might win the Best Actress Oscar. 

As for the film, it could win the 
Oscar, too (I hope). "Moon- 
struck" is a wonderfully roman- 
tic movie that will make you 
laugh and feel good. 
(***★ out of four). 

If you prefer action to 
romance, "Shoot to Kill" is the 
movie you've been waiting for. It 
may well be this year's equivalent 
of "Lethal Weapon." 

Sidney Poitier plays an FBI 
agent tracking down a cold- 
blooded killer with a passion for 
shooting his victims in the left 

eye. The killer joins a group of 
hikers in the mountains of 
Washington. Poitier enlists the 
help of a tour guide (Tom 
Berenger) to help in the chase. 

Along the way, the heroes en- 
counter a blizzard, a deathdefying 
drop off a cliff, and a big bear (in 
a very funny scene). The film 
ends with a frightening shoot-out 
on a cruise ship. And, to add to 
the suspense, we don't know who 
the killer is until half way through 
the movie. 

When I walked into the theater, 
I was almost asleep. When I left, 
I was wide awake. That's the sign 
of an effective action film. 
"Shoot to Kill" is one of the best. 
(★★★ 1/2) 

Richard Pryor' s career has had 
a lot of ups and downs. One of 
the biggest downs came with last 
year's dismal "Critical Condi- 
tion." His new film, "Moving," 
does not rate as one of his best 
works, but it is a funny film that 
is worth a look. 

The plot centers around the dif- 
ficulty Pryor has when he tries to 
move his family to Idaho. Things 
get broken, lost, etc. Other things 
happen, too, but I won't spoil the 
fun of finding out what goes 
wrong next. But keep your eyes 
on Dana Carvey (the Church 
Lady on "Saturday Night Live"). 
His character is not exactly who 
he appears to be. 

"Moving" is the kind of com- 
edy that works best if you put 
your brain on hold for 90 
minutes. If you want to think 
while you laugh, see 
"Moonstruck." If you just want 
to laugh at goofy things, give this 
one a try. (***) 



The Women's Group will pre- 
sent a speaker at their next 
meeting on Thursday, March 24 
at 6:30 p.m. in the Music Listen- 
ing Lounge in the College Center. 

Violet Plantz, M.S.W., will 
speak on "The Range and Levels 
of Human Bonding." Plantz 
teaches ethics and counseling at 
Lincoln University. She also 
serves as a lecturer/trainer for the 
Pennsylvania Office of Drug and 
Alcohol Programs. Conducting 
private counseling, Plantz directs 
a consulting firm. 

The Women's Group purposes 
for women on the campus are 
1) to offer a place to find 
emotional support and peer ad- 
vice, 2) to provide a setting in 
which to better understand self 
and others and 3) to serve as a 
source of information about 
women's issues in order that 
women can more effectively 
reach their goals. 

In keeping with these purposes, 
the February 24 meeting dealt 
with a communication skill 
called the Feedback Model. 
Using this model, one can more 
easily give and take criticism. 
This model is based on the 
thought that a person's ideas are 
always valid, even though the 
assumptions that led to those 
feelings may not be realistic or 

Stupid Tuesday 

by Rob Andrew 

Many reasons exist to explain 
why one votes the way he does. 
There are probably as many dif- 
ferent reasons as there are voters. 
The amount of money a candidate 
spends to market his message is 
a large factor in determining how 
successful the campaign will be; 
that is, whether or not he receives 
the vote. 

Super Tuesday is the "big 
event" of the presidential 
primary season. It is also the tur- 
ning point in many campaigns 
that acts as the catalyst between 
fledgling and "end of the line." 
The ever sacred Super Tuesday 
puts pressure on candidates for 
two reasons. First, the can- 
didates' performance in this event 
will usually foreshadow the re- 
maining primaries because of the 
mamouth media showering the 
rest of the country receives via 
the three major networks repor- 
ting the results of Super Tuesday. 
Second, a contestant feels 
pressure because he is being judg- 
ed simultaneously in 20 different 
states. Approximately only 21 
days precede Super Tuesday in 
which a candidate can actually 
campaign. That's a day and 1 .2 
hours to cover each state! 

Not only is this a physically 
grueling task, but it can be finan- 
cially detrimental as well. In to- 
day's world of politics, dollars 
equal votes. Over 150 different 
television advertising markets ex- 
isted for this past Super Tuesday. 
Al Gore spent $3 million, 
Dukakis spent $2 million and 

Gephart only spent a million on 
TV advertising. Did advertising 
spending influence the voters? 
Just look at the results. When a 
candidate has less then two days 
to visit a state, he must rely 
heavily on the tube to deliver his 
message. In other words, if a can- 
didate does not have money, he 
can't buy advertising. And, if he 
can not get advertising, he won't 
get the votes. 

All of this "Super Tuesday 
Mania" throws havoc into the 
most well-organized system of 
choosing a leader in the world. 
As a result of the pressures 
created by this day, the American 
people are not electing a president 
on his qualifications, but whether 
he can play the Super Tuesday 
game by being able to spend the 
most money. 

A national election is held in 
November. There is no need for 
a "near-national" election in the 
spring. If more time existed bet- 
ween the mass of primaries held 
on Super Tuesday, the candidates 
would have more time to actual- 
ly go out, mingle with the people, 
visit the small towns where 
"America" really exists and 
practice "retail politics." With 
the primaries less concentrated, 
the candidates would be able to 
better budget their money and ac- 
crue an economic advantage as 
well. The people would be the 
real winners as they would be 
more thoroughly informed. 

Tuesday is not such a super one 
any more. In fact, it is more of 
a "stupid" one. 

Right Guard Deodorant or George Bush 

The Road Less Traveled By 

by Christopher Craig 

It is a week after the "Super 
Tuesday" primary results have 
been completed, and it seems that 
Vice President George Bush is 
w ell on his way to becoming the 
Republican party's next nominee 
f or President of the United States. 
Though, his recent wave of suc- 
cesses is not a reflection of a well- 
qualified candidate winning the 
approval of the American voter, 
Du t the end product of a slick, 
w ell financed, advertisement 

George Bush is the most recent 
Sample of an individual being 
sold to the American public as if 
he were a can of deodorant. This 
ls an individual who was born and 
raised in the upper crust of socie- 
"> who has never been exposed 
oany form of public schooling, 
lBu sh attended Greenwich Coun- 

try Day School, Andover Prep 
School and Yale University), but 
claims to be "one of us." In fact, 
the Vice President has made this 
claim of ' 'one of us' ' by asserting 
the status of a "favorite son" in 
New Hampshire, Maine, 
Massachusetts, Vermont, South 
Carolina, Oklahoma, Missouri 
and Texas. Mr. Bush did add 
some legitimacy to his claim to 
Texas since he did vote there. 

This criticism is minor, (though 
one has to wonder how good a 
President Bush can be if he can- 
not recall the state in which he 
lives), but it serves to illustrate 
the way the Bush "marketing" 
campaign operates when it sells 
its product. The Vice President 
has never made any influential 
decisions in his last eight years in 
government, with the exception 

of the Iran-Contra affair of which 
he refuses to discuss. 

The only event in Bush's career 
that offers any insight to how he 
would act as a leader was dismiss- 
ed in his "staged" challenge to 
CBS reporter Dan Rather. But the 
Bush marketing campaign rolls 
on. It does not matter that Bush 
has yet to offer any original ideas 
during his campaign relating to 
any economic issue, foreign 
policy matters and social issues. 
He has only echoed Reagan 
rhetoric when he is campaigning 
in Reagan strongholds, but 
reverts to one-liners and trite 
phrases when he is elsewhere. 
This is an individual who, after 
visiting the Nazi Concentration 
Camps at Auschwitz made the 
emotionally moving comment, 
"Boy, they were big on 

crematoriums, weren't they?" 
And who can forget Bush's 
wonderful appeal to the women 
voters after his debate with 
Democratic Vice Presidential 
Candidate, Geraldine Ferraro 
when he was heard saying, 
"Kicked a little-ass, eh?" The 
last thing our nation needs is 
another President who, when ask- 
ed about school nutrition pro- 
grams claimed that, "Ketchup is 
a vegetable." 

Once again these are petty 
criticisms, but they serve as 
perfect illustration of an in- 
dividual who lacks the political 
understanding of issues, the abili- 
ty to understand the problems and 
difficulties facing most average 
American, and an ability to ex- 
press appropriate emotions and 
beliefs. But, while this would be 
enough for most voters to stay at 

home on election day, it is not 
enough to deter the "George 
Bush Marketing Machine." 

This media machine has spent 
in excess of $2 to $4 million for 
the "Super Tuesday" campaign, 
and an additional $5 million for 
future marketing endeavors. As 
voters we are now faced with the 
dilemma of being influenced by 
a slick marketing campaign that 
is not known for truth or 
substance, or learning about each 
candidate and making an in- 
telligent decision relating to our 
nation's future. Though, when 
the Bush campaign comes to your 
television you must ask yourself, 
am I watching a George Bush ad 
or a Right Guard Advertisement? 
(Some of us would claim that a 
difference does not exist, but that 
is something that should be sav- 
ed for a future article). 


p. 4 THE QUAD Thursday, March 17, 1988 

Leadership Students 
Register Voters 

by Sylvia Hay 

Are you registered to vote? Do 
you plan to vote in the upcoming 
primary elections? Have you been 
following the candidates, judging 
them by which issues they sup- 
port or oppose? 

Next week, from March 21 to 
25, a group from Leadership 1 1 1 
will give students a chance to 
register to vote without leaving 
campus. If you'd like to be 
registered and haven't done it yet, 
why not take this opportunity? A 
table will be set up in the college 
center during lunch and dinner 
hours all week. You'll be just in See Vote p. 5 

Students Study 
Election Process 

time to vote in the next month's 

The leadership group became 
interested in this project when 
they realized how few Americans 
actually do vote. Chris Hills, one 
of the students from the group, 
says that the national average of 
voter turnout of Election Day is 
about 50%. The European 
average, he notes, is much 
higher— about 80% . According to 
statistics, the 18-20 age group is 
the least likely to vote. Hills and 
his classmates speculated that a 
push for voter registration on 

by Steve Trapnell 

About 20 students are current- 
ly learning about the election pro- 
cess in Electing the President 
1988, a history /political science 

Dr. James Broussard, the in- 
structor for the course, said that 
its basic objective is to show 
students what is involved in 
nominating and electing a presi- 
dent. It also deals with the in- 
fluence of television and the 
declining influence of parties in 
American elections. The students 
are studying the changes which 
have occurred in the election pro- 
cess during the last 30 years. 

The course is using the current 
election as a case study, but they 
also study the history of the elec- 
tion process. In class, students 
analyze the results of the 
primaries and caucuses in Iowa, 
New Hampshire, and Super 
Tuesday. For another project, 
they created financing plans for 
a campaign in Lebanon County to 

illustrate that government spen- 
ding limits fall far short of the 
amount needed to run a good 

Throughout the semester, the 
class has been taking monthly 
polls of students about their opi- 
nions of the candidates and the 
election. Although the polls are 
not a representative sample, it 
will allow the class to analyze the 
changes that will occur in opi- 
nions between February and 

A major project will be a mock 
convention, held in April. Each 
student will represent a state or 
group of states. Using informa- 
tion gained in the course, the stu- 
dent will determine how his state 
or states would vote. The class 
will then see who is nominated. 

According to Broussard, most 
of the students in the class are 
history or political science ma- 
jors, although there are some 
students from other majors. 
See Election p. 6 

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Cultures Day Brought 450 Students 

by Steve Trapnell 

On Friday, March 11, approx- 
imately 450 high school students 
visited the campus for Lebanon 
Valley College's sixth annual In- 
ternational Cultures Day. 

According to one of the event's 
co-ordinators, sophomore Brian 
Engle, International Cultures Day 
is meant to "stress the importance 
of knowing a foreign language in 
today's society." It also gives 
language students an opportuni- 
ty to have fun with their foreign 

Approximately 450 students 
from 12 area high schools attend- 
ed this year's program, which 
was organized by Brian Engle 
and Jill Ross. International 
Cultures Day was sponsored by 
the International Business Club, 
the French Club, Teutonia Vallis 
(German Club), and the Hispanic 
Culture Society, with additional 
help from the foreign language 

The day began with a skit per- 
formed by the International 
Business Club. The skit 
highlighted the importance of 
knowing a foreign language. 

Next, the high school students 
were separated for the morning 
competitions. The German 
students participated in a Quiz 
Bowl. French and Spanish 
students presented skits using 
their foreign languages. 

Then the students could either 
take a tour of Blair Music Center, 
Garber Science Center, and the 
Sports Center, or watch a movie 
entitled "Bridging the Culture 

After lunch, there was an 
awards ceremony for the winning 
schools from the morning com- 
petitions. Finally, the foreign 
language clubs of the college per- 
formed skits to entertain the high 
school students. 

The French Club presented an 
exaggeration of various events in 

The most 
exciting few hours 
you'll spend 
all week. 

Run. Climb. Rappel. Navigate. 
Lead. And develop the 
confidence and skills you won't 
get from a textbook. Enroll 
in Army ROTC as one 
of vour electives. Get the facts 
today. BE ALL YOU CAN BE. 

For more information 
contact Capt. Dabrowski 
(call collect) 


French history. Spanish per- 
formers did flamenco dancing, 
and the German Club presented 
a dramatization of the Fasching 

Engle commented that more 
schools wanted to come than the 
college could accommodate. He 
said that they had to turn away 
almost as many schools as they 
accepted. This was primarily 
caused by the limits of the 
school's facilities. 

According to Engle, the pro- 
gram's organizers are consider- 
ing limiting the number of 
students who can come from each 
school in the future. That will 
allow more schools to attend In- 
ternational Cultures Day while 
maintaining the same overall 
number of students. 

Engle said that he felt the day 
was an overall success. He 
believed the students enjoyed the 
activities and that the work put in- 
to the program was well worth it. 

Soloists in 


The LVC Symphony Orchestra 
will perform A Concerto-Ana 
Concert on Sunday, March 20, at 
3 p.m. in Lutz Music Hall. 

Conducted by Dr. Klement 
Hambourg, the Symphony Or- 
chestra will feature student 
soloists David Andrews, 
violinist; Karen Good, soprano; 
and Amy Beth Hammerstone, 





by Lisa Camburn 

The annual Admissions Phone- 
a-thon took place this week from 
March 14-17. The purpose of the 
phone-a-thon is to talk to prospec- 
tive students or students who have 
definitely decided to come to 

The phone-a-thon takes place in 
the Underground, and from 6:30 
to 9:00, LVC students talk to 
prospective students, and answer 

Linda Forster (left); Monica Lomax, Admissions Counselor; Lisa Camburn call prospective 
students during Admissions Phone-A-Thon. photo by Martha Bordic 

any questions they may have 
about campus life, classes or 
financial aid. 

Most of the students are 
appreciative of these phone calls, 
and in some cases, prospective 
students have been "talked into" 
attending LVC due to information 

received by a student caller. For 
example, a prospective student 
who had decided not to attend 
LVC due to financial reasons was 
given information about financial 
aid and therefore was able to 
seriously consider attending LVC 

Students who participate in the 
phone-a-thon are rewarded for 
their time. At the end of the 
session, each student is able to 
make a 10 minute phone call 
anywhere within the continental 

p. 5 THE QUAD Thursday, March 17, 1988 

Vote — 

cont. from p. 4 

campus would be a step in the 
right direction of correcting this 

Students will not be pressured 
toward one party or the other, and 
no campaigning for local or na- 
tional candidates will be done 
during registration. The in- 
dividual will be allowed to make 
his own decisions according to 
personal beliefs. 

The group found in their 
research that individuals often 
feel that their single votes will not 
really "count." The group wants 
to stress that one vote has as much 
power as any other, but that the 
individual has to be registered 
before he can vote. 

Another reason that young peo- 
ple might not vote is because no 
one has showed them how it's 
done. To deal with this problem, 
the group is attempting to get a 
voting booth on campus. This 
way, students who have not 
registered to vote can do it here, 
and they can receive a demonstra- 
tion on how the voting machine 

The group would like to see 
Lebanon Valley's students 
become more aware of their 
power as voters. The group hopes 
that this project will encourage 
students to take advantage of this 
power starting with the next 


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p. 6 THE QUAD Thursday, March 17, 1988 

Fresh Start For 
Women's Softball 

Don Lappin, designated hitter, takes his cuts against York College. 

photo by Chris Lonie 



Final Standings 

* Knights 8-0 
*Residents 6-2 
*Knuckleheads 6-2 
*KALO 5-3 
TKE 4-4 
Chickenhawks 4-4 
PHILO 2-6 
APO 1-7 
FCA 0-8 


Knights vs. KALO 
Residents vs. Knuckleheads 
Winners play for Championship 


Final Standings 
Women's IM Volleyball 
1st— Second Floor Vickroy 
2nd-The Club 

Runners up 

Clio and FCA 


Women's continuous racquetball 
tournament, and Co-ed Walley- 
ball. Sign up in Arnold Sport's 
Center by Friday, March 18. 

by Bryna Vandergrift 

Although LVC women's soft- 
ball team has lost five starters, it 
does not mean things are not 
looking bright for this year's 

"I'm very enthusiastic about 
this year's team," stated head 
coach Kathy Tierney . "The team 
is developing a cohesiveness and 
I'm really encouraged because it 
is something that we didn't have 
last year." 

LVC's returning starters in- 
clude co-captains Glenda Shetter 
and Barb Lowie, Marianne 
Lamareaux, Sandy Aumiller, 
Diane Churan, Michelle Sullivan 
and Sharon Faust. 

Because the team has lost five 
starters, Tierney said that some 

Men's Baseball 

by Lance Shaffer 

The Lebanon Valley College 
baseball squad traveled to Cocoa, 
Florida over Spring Break to 
prepare for the upcoming season. 
They began practicing upon ar- 
rival and started actual games two 
days later. 

The Dutchmen compiled a 4-7 
record through the week against 
schools such as Belmont College, 
Bemidgi University, R.I.T., and 
Wesley College. 

More important than the 
record, the team was able to gain 
some experience by playing so 
often during the week. The level 
of competition was above average 
and this should enable the squad 
to return home with a headstart 
on the local competition. 

The team started its season by 
sweeping York College last 
Saturday by scores of 8-6 and 


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key infield positions will need to 
be filled with freshmen. This in- 
cludes Nannette Bassinsky at cat- 
cher and Jen Leito at shortstop. 
' 'We're really going to be putting 
a lot of responsibility on our 
younger players," said Tierney. 

Tierney said that one challenge 
with softball is the number of 
games played in such a short 
period of time. Tierney feels that 
it should not be a problem for 
LVC after the first game when 
they can adjust to and fix the pro- 
blems that may arise. Tierney 
ended with, "I'm really positive 
on how well this team will adjust 
and I think we will have a good 

The women's first game will be 
on Sunday, March 20 at home. 

Election — 

cont. from p. 4 

Broussard added that when the 
course was taught in 1984, it had 
about 40 students, compared with 
the 20 enrolled in this course. At 
that time, the course counted as 
a general education requirement, 
which encouraged more students 
to take it. 

Broussard also noted that there 
are not as many students who are 
heavily involved in politics as he 
had expected. Some students in 
the class, he said, are people who 
are just learning the fundamentals 
of politics. 

Commenting on the political at- 
mosphere of Lebanon Valley Col- 
lege, Broussard said that it's "a 
lot tamer that more urban state 
universities." He continued that 
this is partly due to the fact that 
most students at this school grew 
up in this area, most of them are 
Republican, and they are not in- 
tensely ideological. Most political 
action comes from groups on the 
extremes. Broussard summed it 
up by saying that Lebanon 
Valley's students are " not 
unaware, just unexcited." 

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Elton John New 
LVC President 

by Don Juan, Exclusive for THE QUACK 
The administration announced 
today that they selected Elton 
John, world-famous singer and 
musician, as the new president of 
Lebanon Valley College. The an- 
nouncement came after nearly a 
year of searching for a qualified 
and capable person. 

According to the presidential 
search committee, the quest for a 
new president had "dragged on 
too long," so they decided to 
search abroad for a worthy can- 
didate. Through a lead from 
L.V.C.'s Music Department, 
they found Elton John. 

Said John, "I was thrilled to be 
given such a unique opportunity 
to expand my horizons, and 

believe the change of pace is just 
what I need." He added that he 
looks forward to serving the 
Valley and being part of the in- 
timate campus community. He 
already has plans to record a new 
LP entitled "One Night In Ann- 
ville," beginning this fall with a 
tentative Christmas release. 

"I hope to share my musical 
abilities with L.V.C. as well as 
give performances whenever 
possible," added Mr. John, who 
will arrive in Annville sometime 
in July to prepare for the fall. 

John is best known for such hits 
as "Goodbye Yellow Brick 
Road," "Benny and the Jets," 
"I'm Still Standing," and most 
recently, "Candle in the Wind." 

Sports Center To 
Close For Repairs 

b y Guido Y. McGoldstien-Jabbar, Jr. 

The Edward Arnold Sports 
Center will close for renovations 
S0 °n, a Lebanon Valley College 
s Pokesperson said. The center, 
w hich opened earlier this year, 
W 'U close April 14 so that 
w °rkers can give the building 
Som e much needed repair. 
The biggest problem has been 


^creasing number of people 

" s i n g the pool as a toilet facility. 
. - fi rs t the water was crystal 

U J» but day by day it began, 

ell > I think you get the picture," 

"j s Pokesperson said. 
Se 1 has also been noticed that 
jj era l fanatic religious groups 

Ve Dee n residing in the raquet- 

ball courts. The Rajneeshe Mathi 
Kotusho is clearly upset. He said 
he hopes to move his followers 
into Lynch Gym while the 
renovations take place. 

In addition to the pool, workers 
will remove all the asbestos ac- 
cidentally placed into the ceiling, 
and an indoor horse racing track 
will be built. Also, the building's 
interior will be repainted a hot 

The spokesperson said the the 
center may be renamed as well. 
In the future it will be known as 
the Edward Van Halen Goofing 
Off Center. Renovations should 
be completed by March 1992. 

April Fool's Postponed 

April Fool's Day has been 
postponed until April 5th until 
further notice, due to cir- 
cumstances beyond everyone's 
control. So, if you have any 
pranks that you wanted to pull on 
April 1st, you are now authoriz- 
ed to do so TODAY!! 

APRIL 5, 1988 

p. 2 THE QUACK Tuesday, April 5, 1988 


To Get Up In The Morning 

Get A Wake-Up Call From The Deans' Office 


•an early morning visit from your choice 

a) Daffy Duck 

b) Ollie North 

c) Dean Marquette 

•a rousing lecture on rule infractions 


Science Dept. Goes For Broke 

Recently, I've taken a look around and discovered something rather 
disturbing. Perhaps some other people on campus have noticed it, 
too. To figure out what I'm referring to, just take a look at Garber 
Science Center. 

As an English major, I think I have cause to complain. About four 
years ago, the science departments moved into a brand new, antisep- 
tically clean building filled with lots of high-tech, high-priced equip- 
ment. Meanwhile, look at the English Department. It's located in a 
little old house on College Avenue. From what I understand, Garber 
Science Center contains some pieces of equipment which cost more 
than that house is worth. 

Now, some people may argue that the English house is "quaint" 
of "nostalgic." Give me a break! Where would you rather work: 
a new, air-conditioned office or a hot, humid room with creaking 

It's not just the English Department that's been slighted. What about 
the Foreign Language house? What about the Leadership Develop- 
ment Institute? Granted, these buildings don't seem to be quite as bad 
as the English house, but they're not exactly Buckingham Palace, 

This little discrepancy wouldn't even bother me that much if it 
weren't for the science departments' excess spending. Naturally, I'm 
aware that scientific equipment is expensive, and that this equipment 

is necessary for accurate research, but I question the necessity and 
the wisdom of some of the science departments' latest acquisitions: 

1. Recently, the chemistry department purchased a fleet of 
stretched limousines for transportation. These fully loaded luxury 
automobiles are available to professors and students for official 
college purposes at any time. In addition, they can be signed out for 
personal use twenty-four hours in advance. 

2. Several months ago, the physics department asked the 
administration to redecorate their offices. Always agreeable, the 
administration simply asked the professors to draw up plans. Now 
all the offices contain whirlpools and saunas, so that professors can 
wind down after stressful labs. According to an inside source, who 
wished to remain anonymous, one professor's office was remodeled 
at a cost of $1.5 million. 

3 . Last semester, the biology department acquired a Gulfstream 
jet to allow staff and students to travel quickly to seminars all over 
the country. The college is currently storing it in a hangar at 
Harrisburg International Airport, although there are plans to build 
a private runway here at the college. 

Once again, I fail to see that these expenditures are really needed. 
It seems to me that the science departments are misusing the funds 
allocated to them. This madness must be stopped before the staff 
begins its next project: a revolving restaurant to be built on top of 
Garber Science Center. 

The QUACK Staff 

Editor-and-Thief Bud Weiser 

Foreign Correspondents Andy Roberts, Will George? 

Gophers and Loafers Don Juan, Easy Reader 

Janitorial Staff Alan Smithee, O. Bieber 

A&R Guido Y. McGoldstein, Jr., D. Trump 

Snappy Shots j.y. Bean 

The Big Cheese Mark O'Wits 

Dr. Savvy 

by Don Juan 

Dr. Savvy, the mysterious and 
poetic columnist for The Quad, 
has been reported missing by the 
Miami Police Department. Ac- 
cording to local sources, he was 
last seen on March 17th in the 
lobby of the Hyatt Regency hotel 
in Miami Beach, where he had 
been vacationing for Spring 

Savvy was at a Spring Break 
Seminar in Ft. Lauderdale from 
March 1-7, and reportedly plann- 
ed to spend an additional two 
weeks in Miami to rest and finish 
work on his new book The 
Powderkeg Syndrome: You or 

"He was scheduled to leave the 
hotel on March 20 and never 
checked out," said hotel person- 
nel. After a security check, it was 
discovered that he was not in his 
suite, and had left behind a few 
personal belongings, including a 
pair of Gargoyle sunglasses, a 
cap and a Chesterfield overcoat. 

Rumors about his disap- 
pearance include kidnap and 
amnesia. Sources close to Dr. 
Savvy say: "It's just another one 
of his 'incognito stunts'; he'll 
probably turn up in San Francisco 
next week as a rabbi or 

Plagues LVC 

by Don Juan 

The U.S. Department of Health 
and Human Services announced 
today that Illness Week will take 
place the week of April 1 1-15 at 
L.V.C. Staff members of the 
D.H.H.S. will be on hand at the 
College Center during the entire 
week to distribute junk food- 
cigarettes and lack of exercise 
programs. They will also en- 
courage everyone to continu e 
eating regularly in the dining hah 

The Surgeon General will also 
be giving lectures every hour on 
the hour to encourage everyo ne 
to "let their bodies go to the dog 5 
if they haven't already." 


p. 3 THE QUACK Tuesday, April 5, 1988 

Trump Pays $500 Million For 
Center Hall And North College 

by D. Trump 

New York City megadeveloper 
Donald Trump recently conclud- 
ed a deal in which he will pay 
Lebanon Valley College $500 
million for Center Hall and North 

The agreement, which had 
been in the works for several 
months, was signed last week at 
Trump's Palmyra estate, where 
he was vacationing for the 

The billionaire real estate ty- 
coon plans to turn the two LVC 
buildings into luxury con- 
dominiums. After extensive 

renovations this summer, Center 
Hall and North College (to be 
renamed Trump Hall and North 
Trump), will be available for 
students to rent next semester. 
Trump plans to charge New York 
City rates. 

When asked to comment on the 
deal, Trump said that "after 
building Trump Tower in New 
York and Trump Plaza in Atlan- 
tic City, Annville seemed the next 
logical step in my real estate em- 

Although many people recent- 
ly thought that Trump was plan- 

ning to run for U.S. President, he 
explains that his political goals 
are a little more modest. "Dur- 
ing the next local election, I'm 
planning to try for Annville 
Township Manager." Trump has 
already begun to lobby the 
township commissioners to 
change the name of Annville to 

Trump was characteristically 
vocal about his future plans for 
developing Annville. "Naturally, 
I think a gambling casino would 
be excellent, as soon as it's legal. 
That would eliminate the need for 

people to travel to Atlantic City 
every weekend." According to 
Trump, the casino complex, ten- 
tatively named "Trump Acres," 
would include a huge hotel, 
several restaurants, an amuse- 
ment park, and RV facilities. 

Before beginning the casino 
project, however, Trump has a 
more immediate goal. He plans to 
reconstruct LVC's Administra- 
tion Building as a skyscraper, 
making it the world's tallest 
building. Naturally, it would be 
called the Donald Trump Ad- 
ministration Building. 

Movie Review 

Hey Dudes, What A Rad Movie! 

b y Alan Smithee 

OK, Dudes, there's this really 
awesome movie that's just been 
released on home video that 
you've gotta see. It's just so cool 
cause it's got everything in it: 
se x, violence, naked people, peo- 
ple getting all cut up and stuff, 
People with no clothes on, peo- 
ple getting their heads blown off, 
all that other radical stuff. It's 
called "Surf Nazis Must Die" 
and if you miss it, you're just 
about the biggest neo-maxi-zoom- 
dvveebie that ever existed! Really! 

So, like, in the plot there's 
these awesome Surf Nazis who 

try to take over this beach, you 
know? And one day they kill this, 
like, black guy 'cause they're 
prunejuiced or whatever that 
word is that means you don't like 
someone 'cause they're different 
from you. So anyway, this dead 
dude's mother goes after them to 
get revenge. 

That's when the movie gets 
REALLY awesome. This lady, 
like, she blows a couple of the 
Surf Nazis away. And then 
there's the leader named Adolf 
(as in Hitler, you know?) who 
tries to get away in this boat with 
his girlfriend. So this lady gets a 

To Run 

by Andy Roberts 

Robert Harnish, manager of 
the school bookstore, has been 
named regional campaign direc- 
tor for Democratic presidential 
hopeful Jesse Jackson. The 
announcement was made at a 
press conference on Friday, 
March 25 in Dayton, Ohio. 

Gerald Austin, General 
Manager for the Jackson Cam- 
paign, feels Harnish was the 
logical choice to fill the vacancy 
for a campaign director in Penn- 
sylvania. "His experience and 
contact with the political 
machines of this highly conser- 
vative area will be beneficial to 
the Jackson organization," 
Austin acknowledged. 

A 1966 graduate of Randolf 
Macon College, Harnish has 
managed the College Store since 
1967 and is a member of the 
President's Staff at Lebanon 
Valley College. He is a recent 
convert to the Democratic Party 
and is eager to assist the Jackson 
campaign. His goals include a 
mamouth publicity campaign to 
sell "I Love Jesse" sweatshirts in 
college bookstores across the 

In a telephone interview, 
Jackson commented on Harnish 's 
appointment. "First of all, it is 
really good to have someone with 
Bob's experience on my staff. Se- 
cond, we need real good leader- 
ship in Pennsylvania and it is just 
great that someone from the 
Leadership College will be join- 
ing with me in my efforts." 

Harnish will take a leave of 
absence from his post at the col- 
lege store until Pennsylvania's 
April 26 primary. Linda L. 
Summers will assume the respon- 
sibilities of running the college 

boat and follows them, and then 
she shoots this dude's babe and 
runs over her with the boat! And 
there's blood and guts every- 
where, and it was so awesome! I 
ran it back about five times, it 
was so cool. 

So anyway, don't miss this 
film. Do yourself a favor and rent 
it, like, right away. I think it 
should get the Oscar for Best Pic- 
ture 'cause nobody got wasted in 
"Broadcast News." Until next 
time, may all your movies be as 
gnarly as "Surf Nazis Must 
Die!" (★★★★* out of four) 


FOR SALE— 1982 S-10 pick-up, Tahoe 
Package; low mileage, AM-FM, tilt wheel, 
V-6, light blue w/tarp. Asking $800. 

See Sam Huber or call 867-9967. 
(Free baseball bat included) 


p. 4 THE QUACK Tuesday, April 5, 1988 

Heywood Floyd discovers the mysterious LVC monolith in 

2088: Odyssey Four. 

2088: Odyssey Four 
To Be Filmed Here 

by Don Juan 

M.G.M. announced yesterday 
that filming for a new movie, 
2088: Odyssey Four, will begin 
this summer here on campus at 

According to director Pee Wee 
Herman, the lead role of the 130 
year-old Heywood Floyd will be 

played by freshman whiz kid, 
Howard Bampton. Herman says 
that he believes he can once again 
capture the "discovery of life" 
theme in the continuing saga. 
"There is no doubt that there is 
the possibility of life at the 
Valley," blurbed Herman. 

Student Work/Study 
Rate Adjusted 

by O. Bieber 

The administration recently 
decided to increase the amount of 
money available to students in 
work/study programs to $7,500 
per semester. 

In order to qualify for the new 
plan, students must work a 
minimum of two hours every 
week. Those students who work 
more hours will be compensated 
for the extra time. 

An administration official ex- 
plained the decision: "We simp- 
ly decided that students with cam- 

pus jobs weren't earning enough. 
It became clear that, in order to 
properly compensate students for 
their time, we would need to in- 
crease their salaries from 
minimum wage to $15,000 per 
academic year." 

After hearing about the plan, 
some seniors complained that 
they would miss out on the 
benefits of increased salaries. The 
college promptly agreed to make 
the decision retroactive to the 
beginning of this academic year. 

New Library Coming 
To LVC Next Year 

by Easy Reader 

Most of us here at Lebanon 
Valley are truly pleased with the 
addition of Arnold Sports Center 
to our lives. There have been 
snide remarks among students, 
though, referring to the state of 
the library. The gist of these com- 
ments is that the sport center is 
great, but shouldn't we zoom in 
on academic needs before posing 
recreational options? After all, 
most students agree, it's just plain 
inconvenient to journey to Her- 
shey Med, Millersville, or the 
State Library in Harrisburg every 
time serious research needs to be 

The campus authorities have 
heard our complaints and are 
responding with amazing speed. 
This reaction is largely due to our 
good fortune in securing 
superstar Elton John as our next 

John, during his first campus 
tour of LVC, was appalled to 
discover the obsolescence of the 
facilities of Gossard Memorial 
Library. Most of the chemistry 
and biology materials are actual 
manuscripts copied by English 
monks in the Dark Ages. Students 
have had to translate passages 
from Middle English to modern 
language, spending many extra 
hours trying to glean usable 
knowledge from these texts. The 
manuscripts are certainly 

beautiful, John noted. However, 
"These belong in a museum, not 
a college library," he asserted. 

John has proposed to level our 
current library this summer. On- 
ly the ever-popular micro com- 
puter lab will remain intact. On 
the old foundation a new and im- 
pressive library will be built. 

The new John Library will be 
much more than functional. First 
of all, it will reach true 
skyscraper status, probably con- 
sisting of 80 or more floors. In 
addition to increasing the number 
of current books, periodicals, and 
scientific journals by 60,000 per 
cent, the new library will contain 
20 soundproof conference rooms 
and 80 study lounges of various 
types. Some lounges will be more 
casually furnished with sofas and 
recliners, while others will 
employ the traditional style of 
study cubicles and desks. Some 
will play soft music, some will 
not. All rooms will have plush 
wall-to-wall carpeting. One of the 
top floors will feature a 
restaurant, free of charge to 
students. This way, students will 
not have to leave the library 
building for meals. 

There will be, in addition, an 
extensive music library. CDs, 
albums, and 45 's will be available 
for students to borrow, whether 
they prefer rock, jazz, new wave, 
or classical music. A special 

room will be designated to house 
several copies of every Elton 
John recording ever released. 

Ambitious? John thinks not. He 
has offered to privately fund the 
library's construction. The 
building will require extra 
housekeeping and maintenance 
staff, he realizes. But according 
to John, the library should pay for 

After all, the building will be 
the tallest in the central PA area. 
Daily tours will be given to area 
visitors. Weather permitting, they 
will be able to enjoy a breathtak- 
ing view of Lebanon, Deny, and 
Lancaster Counties from the 
Observation Deck on the roof. 
Students and prospective students 
may receive a free tour. 

Construction of John Library 
will be completed August 30, 
1988. The Grand Opening Tour 
will follow on September 2. All 
students, alumni, and their 
families are cordially invited to 
attend free of charge. 

John hopes that the new library 
will compensate for the past. 
Once students realize how plea- 
sant learning can be, he muses, 
maybe they'll choose to visit the 
library more often. "I think 
research study should be an in- 
teresting challenge," he conclud- 
ed, "but not something they're 
going to dread." 

The Road Recently Paved For More Travel 

Revolution For The Liberation 
Of The Oppressed 

by Will George? 

In a sudden and bold move, 
Dr. James "Lighthorse Lee" 
Broussard led a daring assault 
on the Garber Science Building, 
resulting in the History and 
Political Science Department's 
control of this valued piece of 
College property. Termed 
"Revolution for the Liberation of 
the Oppressed," Broussard's 
dedicated band of revolutionaries 
stormed the Bastile-like fortress 
of Garber, and after a valiant 
defense of glass beakers and 
bottled acid, forced the withdraw 
of Garber' s inhabitants. 

Dr. Eugene "Carlos" Brown, 
Chief of the Revolutionary Secret 
Police, is rumored to have 
rounded-up Garber' s professors 
and assassinated all remaining op- 
position leaders. Though, denied 
by Lt. Col. Oliver Norton, the 
Revolution's Spokesperson, the 
action has been condemned by the 
exiled Garber Government now 
located on the third floor of the 

Administration Building. 

In addition to the bloody coup, 
the History/Political Science Ma- 
jors are reported to be in a looting 
and destructive frenzy, destroy- 
ing any sign of the evil Math and 
Science academic disciplines. 
The target of most of this violence 
has been the offices and 
classrooms of the General Educa- 
tion Professors. Eyewitness, 
Tobias "BG" O'Neill was quoted 
as saying before fleeing the scene 
of the destruction, "Cool, this 
means I can have more time with 
the Dean in my room instead of 
resting before my Bio-Chem ex- 

As typical of the "Leadership 
College," the President was 
rumored to have sought the safe- 
ty of the Presidential Palace, 
while Dean Marquette has fled to 
Elizabethtown College where he 
has been reported to have peti- 
tioned for political asylum, and 
employment as a groundskeeper. 

This sudden outbreak of 
violence is believed to be the end 

result of years of neglect and op- 
pression by the College Ad- 
ministration and the dominance of 
the Garber's Department Chair- 
mans. The Marxist-Lennist in- 
fluence of the History/Pol. Sci. 
Department has been credited to 
Dr. Broussard's personal convic- 
tions, as well as Robert Harnish's 
propaganda efforts on LVC s 
Campus. The first action of the 
new revolutionary residences of 
Garber is to rename the building 
the "David Filbert Center for 
Social Sciences." 

It is the humble opinion of this 
writer that the recent course of 
events should not be met with op- 
position, but encouraged. Change 

is always for the better, 


violence only makes it more m' 
teresting. As Broussard cried 
while carrying the "Stars and 
Bars" into Garber, "Yesterday 11 
was the Economics Department. 
Today the Garber Science 
Center, Tomorrow the Entn e 
Campus! Long Live the Revolu- 



18th Annual Festival 


by Toni Salam 

Spring will come alive with the 
18th Annual Spring Arts Festival. 
From Friday, April 22nd till Sun- 
day, April 24th, the Spring Arts 
Festival will promote art in its 
various forms solely for the pur- 
pose of heightening the campus' 
and community's awareness of 
the arts, although fun can never 
be ruled out of the Festival ex- 
perience. The various art forms 
presented will be music, poetry, 
drama, comedy, photography, 
paintings, dance, and craft. 

The Festival will start Friday 
with an all day special for the 
third grade students from 
Annville-Cleona School District. 
These students will be treated to 
a day full of excitement provid- 
ed by the students of Lebanon 
Valley. The theme for the day 
will be that of Clowns. 

On Friday night, the Lebanon 
Valley College Symphony Or- 
chestra will present a "Pops" 
concert under the direction of Dr. 
Klement Hambourg. The pro- 
gram will include eight classics, 
hit tunes and songs from Broad- 
way musicals, and the music of 
Johann Strauss. The performance 
will be held at 8:00 PM in Lutz 

On Saturday, Lebanon Valley's 
°wn rock band ' 'To Be Announc- 
e d" is scheduled to perform from 
2:00 to 3:00 PM on the East 
^age. This band, under the lead 
y ocals of senior Bob Schalkoff, 
m ade its hit debut at last year's 
festival and is expected to be a 
Sr nash again this year. 

Also on Saturday, following 
T.B.A., the folk singing com- 
bination of Smith and Mayer will 
perform a variety of popular easy 
listening music. Selections to be 
performed are songs from Simon 
and Garfunkel, Bob Dylan, and 
original compositions. 

Other highlighted musical acts 
scheduled to perform throughout 
the weekend are the Clarinet 
Choir, the Jazz Band, H.I.S., 
"Fanfare", and the Tuba 

The poetry of "Porches" will 
be set to music in a debut perfor- 
mance on Saturday at 8:00 PM in 
Lutz Hall. Retired Lebanon 
Valley College Professor of 
music, Thomas Lanesse, will pre- 
sent two soliloques from the 
poems about Annville people 
adapted to original compositions. 

Comedian Dave Peck and the 
Lazerth Theatre Group will pre- 
sent three hilarious comedy acts 
on Sunday from 3:30 to 5:00 PM 
in the Little Theater. These acts 
will deal with people in everyday, 
hilarious situations. 

Other events scheduled are a 
make-up workshop, the belly 
dancing Troupe Kharizmak, 
caricature drawings, screeving on 
the quad, a Juried Art Exhibit, 
crafts on display, the Penn- 
sylvania Dance Theater, and a 
theatrical review from Alpha Psi 

There are many more events 
scheduled to take place for the 
Festival. Please invite your fami- 
ly and friends and make a day of 


See p. 4 

APRIL 14, 1988 

Helping Hands To Benefit Polio Plus 

by Steve Trapnell 

Helping Hands, an annual 
benefit sponsored by APO and 
Gamma Sigma Sigma, will be 
held this year on April 14, 15, 
and 16 in Lebanon Valley Mall. 
Proceeds from the event will be 
donated to the Polio Plus Cam- 
paign of Rotary International. 

On Thursday and Friday, Help- 
ing Hands will be held from 
3 p.m. until the mall closes at 
9 p.m. On Friday, the hours will 
be 10 a.m. until 9 p.m. 

This year, the event will raise 
money for the Polio Plus Cam- 
paign of Rotary International. 
The goal of the program is to im- 
munize all the world's children 
against polio over a period of five 
years. Any extra money raised by 
the campaign will be used for im- 
munizations against other 

This year's benefit was 

organized by Lore-Lee 
Bruwelheide, Neil Biser, and Jim 
Warren. Helping Hands will in- 
clude traditional carnival booths 
set up in Lebanon Valley Mall. In 
addition to the regular booths, the 
Rainbow Troupe will have a face- 
painting booth. 

An auction, organized by Mary 
Catherine Wilson and Heidi 
Derhammer, will be held Friday 
at 7 p.m. It will be run by an auc- 
tioneer and will include items 
donated by students, faculty, and 
friends of the college. 

A raffle drawing will be held 
Saturday at 6 p.m. Tickets for the 
raffle can be purchased at a booth 
in the mall or from members of 
APO and Gamma Sig until the 
time of the drawing. Some of the 
prizes include stuffed animals 
donated by Strawberry Patch and 
gift certificates from a variety of 
stores, restaurants, and theaters. 

The raffle is the main money 
maker of the event. It was 
organized by Kim Morgan and 
Beatrice Vagyoczky. 

The fashion show, to be held 
Saturday at 7 p.m., was planned 
by Bob Sherman and Kathy 
Supplee. Students will model 
clothing provided by stores in the 

Helping Hands will also in- 
clude entertainment. Paul Smith 
will be playing the guitar and 
singing. A cast from the musical 
will perform a scene at 1 p.m. on 
Saturday. Several Sinfonia 
brothers will be singing on Thurs- 
day evening. 

There will be an information 
booth where people can make 
donations and buy raffle tickets 
and baked goods. In addition, 
there may be a dunking booth 
outside the mall, if it can be 

p. 2 THE QUAD Thursday, April 14, 1988 


The Big Answers 

by Steve Trapnell 

In the February 25, 1988 issue of The Quad, we printed an 
editorial entitled "The Big Questions." The purpose of the editorial 
was to pose to the campus a number of unanwered questions or un- 
solved mysteries about Lebanon Valley College. I also invited 
members of the college community to respond to these questions. 
Well, someone did. Dr. James Broussard, chairman of the history 
and political science department, wrote a letter answering all of my 
questions. Since I welcome any chance to get out of a little work, 
I decided to print excerpts from Dr. Broussard's answers instead of 
writing a real editorial. 

1 . Why do we call spring break spring break? 

"We call spring break "spring break" because it is spring in 
Florida, where most students go during this period. As a requirement 
for receiving federal student aid money the government has decreed 
(in Public Law 79-445 (a) (iii), sec. 12) that all interruptions in the 
regular semester must be labeled with the season that exists where 
students will actually be spending that break. This is popularly known 
as the "Truth in Vacation" law." 

2. What are those big hunks of stone outside the lobby of Blair 
Music Center? 

"The big hunks of stone, as you call them, outside the lobby of 
Blair Music Center are not a piece of "modern art." This is a widely 
held misconception. The big hunks of stone actually are Blair Music 
Center; the artifact that we call "Blair Music Center" in everyday 
talk, is an enormous piece of modern art. You are not the first per- 
son who has made this mistake." 

3. Why are there no windows in Garber Science Center? 
"There are no windows in Garber Science Center so that the sharks 

will not scare passers-by." 

4. Why can you mail a letter across the country more quickly than 


Thanks For 
The Letters 

by Christina Weber 

I hope everyone enjoyed our spoof issue of The Quad. I'd like to 
thank the members of The Quad staff who participated in the hat- 
ching of The Quack for their hard work and creative energies. I also 
have another big thank you to extend. Hold onto your hats, folks! 
This issue contains four, count them, Letters to the Editor. Finally, 
people have broken down and decided to voice their opinions. In my 
humble view, this is what a college paper is for: to provide a means 
of communicating pertinent student news and student opinions. We 
have tried our best to provide the news, but only you can provide 
the opinions (I should write for the army). 

To everyone who took the time to write letters, thank you. To 
anyone still wishing to make their public stand-last issue comes out 
April 28, 1 would need the letter the Friday before at the latest. I realize 
this editorial is short, but I believe the other students' opinions are 
more important than my own. (SENIORS— take those caps and gowns 
out of their plastic wrappings. Only 24 more days till G-day and you 
wouldn't want to walk in a wrinkly gown, would you?) 

across the campus? (Please note that Dr. Broussard's letter in answer 
to my questions took nearly one month to travel from the Administra- 
tion Building to the English house, which is just across the street-and 
this time I'm NOT joking.) 

"You can mail a letter across the country more quickly than across 
campus because campus mail actually is routed across the country 
first. Every evening at 4:30 Mark Manno puts all campus mail in a 
large pouch, drives to Harrisburg airport and takes a round-trip redeye 
flight to Los Angeles and back. He arrives back at LVC at 7:45 the 
next morning, just in time to put the campus mail in the proper box. 
The reason mail is delayed is that sometimes there is a problem mak- 
ing plane connections in Denver or Omaha." 

5. Has there ever been a time when all the printers in the library 
computer center have functioned properly? 

"All the printers in the library computer center do function 
properly at all times. The reason students feel frustrated is not that 
the printers are broken, but that the students do not realize the 
purpose of each printer. Periodically, some are reprogrammed on a 
random basis to print what is known as "invisible characters." So, 
the next time you see a printer apparently "malfunctioning" or 
"broken," remember that it is simply on another assignment for 
purposes that cannot be revealed to undergraduates at the present 

6. Why does the Administration Building seem to have more stairs 
than any other building in the world? 

"The Administration building seems to have more stairs than any 
other building in the world because it actually does have more stairs 
than any other building in the world. As you enter the ground-floor 
door and walk up, a large staff of technicians adds layers of stairs 
above you, relocating floors as necessary. So when you reach what 
we call the "third" floor, you have actually walked 1.23 miles. 

Savvy Says 

Dear Dr. Savvy: 

I'm having a tough time putting 
up with another guy that lives 
near me in the dorm. He is a very 
obnoxious, overbearing person. 
He treats other people with little 
regard for their feelings. And, he 
is a very bad liar. However, he 
can be a very nice person, if he 
wants to be. 

Do you have any suggestions 
that could help me deal with this 

P. O'd. 

Dear P. O'd.: 

Well, it seems you've ex- 
pressed feelings which are very 
common these days in college 
life. Since there are many 


Christina Weber Managing Editor 

Steve Trapnell News Editor 

Dwayne Nichols Layout Editor 

Bryna Vandergrift Sports Editor 

Lisa Camburn Proofreader 

Staff: Rob Andrew, Ian Bonner, Martha Bordic, Chris Craig, Sylvia Hay, Rick Klenk, Christopher 
Lonie, Mike McGranaghan, Doug Nyce, Toni Salam, Lance Shaffer, and Becky Snyder. 

Kathy Johnson Advertising Manager 

Bob Baker Business Manager 

Charlene Shaffer Assistant Business Manager 

Richard Arnold Financial Advisor 

Leon Markowicz Editorial Advisor 

personalities and lifestyles thrown 
together in a closed-in setting, we 
are bound to have our bouts and 
clashes. This is inevitable. We 
can only learn to cope with them 

It is important to understand the 
other side of the story and what 
makes people tick or what ticks 
people. Then, and only then, can 
we deal with their personalities, 
regardless of how 'obnoxious' or 
'overbearing' they may be. We 
cannot attempt to change so- 
meone's personality, but only 
cope with it and be patient and 
tolerant of it. 

The key to living peacefully 
with others, especially in a dorm, 
is to find the good side of the per- 
son and learn to enjoy that side. 
Nobody's perfect, so let's bear 
with the flaws and enjoy 
ourselves as much as possible! 

Sincerely , 
Dr. Savvy 


by Rob Andrew 

The politicians vying for this 
year's presidential nomination 
have been compared to many 
things, including the seven 
dwarfs and a can of Right Guard 
deoderant. To ascertain a logical 
reason for Jesse Jackson's recent 
political success, one can draw a 
comparison between the Jackson- 
Dukakis contest and two popular 

Mike Dukakis is the Chevy 
Nova of political candidates. He 
is the ultimate pragmatic. The 
Chevy Nova will no doubt get 
you where you are going, but its 
styling and power will not keep 
you on the edge of your seat. 
Basic transportation. It gets the 
job done, but it doesn't really ex- 
cite anyone. That's the Chevy 
Nova. That's also Mike Dukakis. 
Characterized by the press as the 
candidate that buys his suits from 
J.C. Penney's, Dukakis has a 
stand on the basic issues. He can 
probably get the job done, but 
he's not exciting anyone. A re- 
cent poll shows that many 
Americans are still not aware of 
who Mike Dukakis actually is. So 
to speak, he is "basic transpor- 
tation . ' ' 

Over in the passing lane and 
right on Dukakis's back bumper 
is Jesse Jackson, disguised as a 
Camaro Z28. Jesse also has a 
stand on the basic issues and can 
probably get the job done as well. 
But he has power and style and 
comes loaded with the preferred 
option package. When Jesse 
talks, people become motivated 
and excited. Jesse is the man; he 
is a household word and nearly 
everyone recognizes him without 
any trouble. 

On the long turnpike to the 
presidency, the Camaro Z28 cat 
ches people's eye more read' 
than the Nova. The issue is n 
which car is more capable of ar- 
riving at the destination, but 
rather, which one has more flair- 
Jesse is charismatic and appeal- 
ing on a ticket of Chevy Novas. 
Perhaps that is why he is rapidly 
becoming the "heartbeat 
Democratic America." 


Symphony "Pops" To 
Open Spring 


The Spring Arts Festival will 
open with a bang on Friday, April 
22 at 8 p.m. with "The Best of 
Broadway" played by the LVC 
Symphony Orchestra. 

Favorites such as West Side 
Story, Porgy and Bess, Oklahoma 
and The Sound of Music will be 
featured in the concert in Lutz 

Music Hall directed by Associate 
Professor Dr. Klement 

Student soloists will be Wendy 
Noll and Robert Schalkoff . Guest 
conductors for the concert are 
Julie Matthews and Davi 

The concert is open to the 
public without charge. 

p. 3 THE QUAD Thursday, April 14, 1988 

Letters To 
The Editor 

Dear Editor, 

Hope I made your day with this 
letter. I've written not to con- 
demn, really, but to unload some 
questions that have been burning 
inside me. I only hope this is still 
timely enough for you to print. 

It's about the Tommy Conwell 
and the Young Rumblers show. 
As we all know (I hope), Tom- 
my played the gym on Palm Sun- 
day. Unfortunately, only about 
100 people showed up. I was ap- 
palled. Finally, LVC brings in a 
top name band, but no one seem- 
ed to care. Why? What's wrong 
with you people? How can T.C. 
and the Rumblers play On Stage- 
just a few miles down Route 
422-and pack the place while on- 
ly drawing a dismal crowd at an 
equally well-done, all-age show 
at LVC? I think this was the only 
Tommy show I've been to which 
did not sell out. 

For Student Council this must 
come as an awful blow. I'm sure 
the ticket take does not even begin 
to cover the cost of bringing 
Tommy Conwell to campus. But 
then I also have some questions 
about the way the show was pro- 
moted. Why did LVC pay for 
advertisements on Q-106? They 
don't even play Tommy Conwell! 
How could Q-106, in good faith, 
promote his show to their unac- 
quainted audience? And why pay 
for an appearance by Casey Sum- 
mers? It was an added cost 
without added benefit for LVC. 

I believe a simple flyer cam- 
paign would have worked much 
better in attracting an outside au- 
dience for the show. A few 
posters distributed to local high 
schools and malls plus a few ads 
in the Daily News would have 
been more cost-effective. Then, 
the only problem left to conquer 
would be campus apathy... any 

M. Fabian 

Dear QUAD editorial staff, 

I read with great skepticism 
your articles in the January 
QUAD criticizing the restraints 
placed upon pledging activities. I 
have grown tired of listening to 
cries of "unfair to Greeks!" 
every time that a fraternity or 
sorority is not allowed to do total- 
ly as it pleases. I believe that your 
paper should examine the 
behavior of the Greek communi- 
ty and ask if its conduct merits 
any respect from the rest of the 

It should be a matter of great 
concern— and even embarrass- 

ment — to the members and 
leaders of the Greek organiza- 
tions that the people who indulge 
in the public humiliation of 
female students, who believe that 
places at the heads of lines are 
reserved for them, who begrudge 
the 50 cent admission and crash 
the gate at the Underground, and 
who roam the campus in a stupor 
by dinnertime on Fridays almost 
all seem to be connected with one 
or another of LVC's so-called 
"social" organizations. Through 
these actions, they show contempt 
for other students and should ex- 
pect nothing more than contempt 
in return. 

The campus community has the 
right to request that its sleep not 
be interrupted by tribal chanting 
and that its dining room remain 
a reasonably pleasant place to 
eat — if such requests interfere 
with the cultivation of 
brotherhood (as was claimed in 
January's QUAD), the members 
of the Greek community should 
be ashamed at how shallow their 
concept of brotherhood really is. 

-Kenneth Miller, 
Alpha Psi Omega 

Dear Editor, 

Asa member of Student Coun- 
cil, I would like to thank Bryna 
Vandergrift, Dave Calverio, Bill 
Giovino, TKE, APO and the 
council for all their hard work in- 
volved in organizing the Tommy 
Conwell concert. 

A concert has not been on this 
campus since Spring Arts of 1985 
when the Sharks and Kix per- 
formed. One hears of concerts on 
other college campuses and may 
be envious of them. This concert 
was organized for students. The 
students and the community who 
attended thoroughly seemed to 
enjoy themselves. The apathetic 
attitude on this campus in suppor- 
ting this event was shown in stu- 
dent attendance. Yes, a music 
recital was at the same time. Yes, 
tests were held. Yes, money is 
scarce. Justified excuses are one 
thing; rationalizing to yourself by 
using these excuses is another. 

Tommy Conwell is going to be 
in the recording studio for Col- 
umbia Records soon. I hope all 
who did not attend realize the fun 
they missed out on. Surely in the 
future, I should hope not to hear 
that LVC does not offer activities 
for its students to attend. 

Delia K. Sitaras 

Dear Editor, 

In response to the editorial con- 
cerning the "condoms on cam- 
pus" issue, I feel that it is time 
that I voice my opinion. 

Being a transfer student from 
Millersville University, I was in- 
volved in the decision-making 
process that produced the condom 
dispensers in the laundry rooms 
at Millersville. I'm sure that, like 
Millersville students, some LVC 
students are sexually active. 
While I believe that it is the 
responsibility of the individual to 
take the necessary precautions 
before sharing in a sexual ex- 
perience, the college must share 
in that responsibility also. 

I have visited all of the local 
stores that are in walking distance 
of the college, and have found 
that none of them stock condoms. 
Believe me, there is not a condom 
to be purchased in Annville. In 
fact, you would have to travel 
east to Lebanon or west to 
Palmyra in order to secure one. 
This imposes yet another problem 
on the issue. What are the sexual- 
ly active people who do not have 
cars to do? It is unlikely that a 
person would call home to mom 
and say, "Hey mom, would you 
pick me up a pack of rubbers?" 
Should we make those individuals 
take such an unnecessary risk? I 
feel that this is very unfair to the 
students. The administration has 
turned its back on reality. 

One thing that we all must 
remember is that we are attending 
a church-affiliated school. I guess 
the administration feels that since 
we have chosen a churchaffiliated 
school we don't know about sex, 
or are not sexually active. Maybe 
we are not allowed 

On other college campuses 
around the country the three- 
for-free program is used. This 
means that a person can go to the 
counter in the college store and 
say, "three-for-free, please," 
and be handed a packet of free 
condoms. I feel that the ad- 
ministrators of those colleges 
show a greater concern for the 
welfare of their students than the 
administration here. 

Finally, it is my opinion that we 
should have a say in issues such 
as this. Those who are sexually 
active need to take the proper 
precautions, thus I advocate the 
sale, if not free distribution of 
condoms on campus. 

-B. Horst 

Movie Reviews 

Two Novel Movies 

by Mike McGranaghan 

Several years ago, the novel 
"Bright Lights, Big City" was a 
national best-seller. Now it has 
been turned into one of the year's 
biggest motion pictures. But, as 
with any film adaptation of a 
popular novel, the question is: Is 
the movie as good as the book? 
In this case, the answer is 
definately yes. 

The movie stars Michael J. Fox 
as a young fact-checker for a high 
society magazine. His wife has 
left him to pursue a modeling 
career in Paris. His mother has 
died. And he is coming closer and 
closer to losing his job every day. 
He deals with these pressures by 
snorting cocaine and frequenting 
nightclubs with his friend Tad 
Allagash (played by Keifer 

The more drugs he takes, the 
more desperate he becomes. The 
film chronicles his downward 
spiral into New York City's 
nightlife, as he tries to put his 
own life back together. 

This is an unusual role for 
Michael J. Fox. It's totally dif- 
ferent from his other film work, 
but he does an excellent job. He 
makes the audience understand 
the pain his character is going 
through. The supporting perfor- 
mances are quite good, too. 
Keifer Sutherland is perfect as 
Fox's alter ego, and Phoebe Cates 
brings a new meaning to the word 
cold as Fox's estranged wife. 

I'm a big fan of the novel the 
film is based on. In fact, the 
screenplay was written by Jay 

Mclnerney, the book's author, so 
it's a very close adaptation. I was 
waiting a long time to see the 
filrar, and it did not let me down. 
"Bright Lights, Big City" is un- 
doubtedly one of the year's best 
movies. (**** out of four) 

In my life I've seen several 
hundred movies, but I can honest- 
ly say that "BeetleJuice" is the 
absolute weirdest of them all. But 
that's OK: I love weird movies. 

"BeetleJuice" is the story of a 
nice young couple who unfor- 
tunately die. After their death, 
their ghosts are sent back home 
to live freely. However, the 
house is sold to a living family. 
The ghosts try to scare the peo- 
ple away, but do not succeed. 

So they call "BeetleJuice" 
(a.k.a. Michael Keaton), a pro- 
fessional exterminator of the still- 
living. He comes in and causes 
havoc, but when he refuses to 
leave, the ghosts and the family 
band together to exterminate him. 

Perhaps this doesn't sound as 
weird as it is. That's because it's 
difficult to explain the visual style 
of this film without giving away 
the surprises. So I'll put it this 
way: "BeetleJuice" is like 90 
minutes of the "Large Marge" 
scene from "Pee-Wee's Big 
Adventure." If you haven't seen 
that film, you're out of luck. 

My only complaints? I wish the 
title character had come into the 
story a little sooner, and I wish 
his wrath at the end had been 
longer. Other than that, "Beetle- 
Juice" is an absolute scream. 

"/ have a dream..." 

Try as Mr. Andrews might, he 
cannot dispute or ignore the reali- 
ty that the Presidential campaign 
of Rev. Jesse Jackson has stirred 
the most excitement in any 
presidential campaign since the 
time of John F. Kennedy, 
(another great Democrat). 
Jackson's campaign not only 
challenges the racial bariers sur- 
rounding the Oval Office, but he 
challenges the myth, (still believ- 
ed by individuals such as 
Andrews), that the presidency is 
only for those few white middle 
aged males that have a record of 
traditional political experience. 
Today these myths are being shat- 
tered, tomorrow they will be 

"I have a dream," was the 
memorable phrase utered in front 
of the Lincoln Memorial on that 
hot summer afternoon in 
Washington D.C. by Rev. Dr. 
Martin Luther King, Jr. His 

dream of racial equality is now 
being pursued by his followers 
twenty years after his assassina- 
tion by a bigoted gunman. 
Jackson's campaign for the 
Presidency is also a quest for a 
dream, a hope for individual 
dreams. It is the dream and hope 
of a new beginning at life for the 
hundred displaced farmers suffer- 
ing under the shadow of 
Republican "voodoo econo- 
mics," (a George Bush term). It 
is the dream and hope for affor- 
dable housing for thousands of 
homeless men, women and 
children who live on the streets 
in our nation's cities. It is the 
dream and hope for a better 
world, a new tomorrow where 
senseless death to drugs, crime, 
poverty and nuclear annihilation 
could become a thing of the past. 
These are the wants and desires 
of the millions of Jackson's sup- 
porters largely ignored during the 
cont. on p. 4 

p. 4 THE QUAD Thursday, April 14, 1988 

Seven + Seven = 4V2 

by Ian Bonner 

It's 7:10 P.M. in the dressing 
room. The cast of Seven Brides 
for Seven Brothers shuffles and 
scurries in anxious preparation 
for the opening night 8 o'clock 
curtain. Everyone chatters and 
giggles as they make-up in front 
of the mirrors and the girls touch 
up their hair with curling irons. 
In minutes, they change from 
street clothes into dainty and 
colorful dresses, fit for the 19th 
century setting of the spring 
musical. The men, dressed in 
modest, country decor of blue 
jeans and flannel shirts, eagerly 
wait to take the stage to meet their 
lovely brides. 

As the show is about to begin, 
Director Michael Steckman paces 
the vicinity with the look of hope 
and confidence on his face. But 
no need to worry here because his 
feelings were certain to match the 

Dream cont. from 

last year of the Reagan 

Jackson as an individual is as 
much full of promise as the ideas 
he represents. He has been more 
involved in foreign relations by 
meeting with more international 
dignitaries than Governor 
Dukakis and Vice President 

outcome of the play as he ex- 
pressed: "It's going to be 

The next two hours were filled 
with a pleasant down to earth 
story: boy meets girl and six other 
boys meet six other girls in a 
small Oregon town. Adam, 
played by Jef Betz, falls for 
leading lady Milly, played by 
Wendy Noll, and thus leads his 
six younger "alpha-biblical" 
brothers Benjamin, Caleb, 
Daniel, Ephraim, Frank and 
Gideon played by Drew 
Hildebrand, Brent Trostle, Bill 
Guntrum, Scott Carter, Ken 
Krawchuk and Bill Snelling, 
respectively, to pursue the six 
innocent brides-to-be who are in- 
stantaneously swept off their feet, 
despite unsuccessful sweeps by 
the townies. The adorable and 
fun-loving brides were played by 
Kathy Henry, Linda Powell, 

p. 3 

Bush. Jackson has captured 
roughly the same amount of votes 
as his closest opponent, Governor 
Dukakis, with only a fraction of 
the money that the Dukakis cam- 
paign is spending. He proves that 
one cannot buy the nomination. 
This is a man who has worked 
with the civil rights movement of 

Sharon Bedner, Lisa Russoniello, 
Sharon Barr and Heidi Walter. 

The tunes are fun, snappy and 
as old-fashioned and sentimental 
as "You Are My Sunshine." The 
brides sing with clear, unblemish- 
ed voices as the brothers belt out 
the melodies in a macho and 
gusty manner. The chemistry 
between the brides and brothers 
is also genuine and convincing. 
There is no doubt that this 
musical is good, clean fun with 
something for everyone. 

The musical continues this 
weekend April 15, 16, and 17 at 
8:00 P.M. Tickets are $5 Friday 
and Saturday and $1 on Sunday 
for students (a definite bargain for 

Congratulations to Mike 
Steckman for a successful show 
and for a successful theater career 
at Lebanon Valley. This one's for 
you: (****'/2 out of five). 

the 60's, the education and voter 
registration drive of minorities 
during the 70' s and the poverty 
relief campaigns of the 80's. 
Jackson has first hand knowledge 
of the evils in our society; he is 
not the product of a rich elitist 
lifestyle. Jackson is a man of the 

Wendy Noll and Jef Betz dip and swing in rehearsal 
for "Seven Brides For Seven Brothers" which runs 
this Friday, Saturday and Sunday 8 p.m. 
Photo by Chris Lonie. 

There are those who would 
want you, the voter, to think 
calmly and rationaly and vote for 
"someone who can win." But 
these are the same individuals 
who tried to block the progress of 
Rev. King's dream of racial 
equality. Do not vote for someone 
because they might win, 

vote for who you believe. The 
message of King's "I have a 
dream. ..." speech is a living 
message that can no longer be ig- 
nored. Jackson for President, for 
a new tomorrow, for the realiza- 
tion of our dreams and for a bet- 
ter world. Sorry Rob, good try. 


LVC Seniors — Your time has come! 

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p. 5 THE QUAD Thursday, April 14, 1988 


by Lance Shaffer 

The Flying Dutchmen baseball 
team scored four runs in the bot- 
tom of the seventh inning to 
defeat Susquehanna 5-4 and com- 
plete their sweep of the MAC 
doubleheader Sunday. 

Trailing 4-1 heading into their 
final at-bat, Shawn Shreffler, 
Britt Mowrey, and Bill Woland 
had consecutive singles. After a 
pitching change Daryl Keller 
walked, Lance Shaffer singled 
and Daryl Hess walked. With the 
score tied, Susquehanna brought 
in another reliever who ended the 
game by walking Chris Smith for 
the game-winning run. 

Chris Kastel was the winning 
pitcher for the Dutchmen, who 
scattered eight hits, walked four 
and struck out one. 

In game one the Dutchmen en- 
joyed a seven run-third inning 
and rode the seven-hit pitching of 
Christian Foust to a 7-1 victory. 

In the third inning Lance Shaf- 
fer walked, Daryl Hess doubled, 
Chris Smith was hit by a pitch, 
Mike Spangler singled and Chris 
Kastel walked before an out was 
made. Kenny Wilson then walk- 
ed, Troy Celesky singled, Scott 
Waugerman walked and Shaffer 
walked again before the inning 
was over. That was all the Dut- 
chmen needed as Foust struck out 
six and walked one. 

The day before the Dutchmen 
were swept by Muhlenburg 1 1-7 
and 4-0. In game one Daryl Hess, 
Chris Smith and Mike Spangler 
shared seven of the team's eleven 
hits, but it wasn't enough as 






Muhlenburg jumped out to an 
early 10-3 lead and never looked 

In game two the Dutchmen col- 
lected only four hits as Dutchmen 
ace Daryl Hess suffered his se- 
cond hard-luck loss of the season, 
the other a 1-0 loss to Gettysburg. 

Baseball Record 

LVC 5 Susquehanna 4 
LVC 7 Susquehanna 1 
Muhlenburg 1 1 LVC 7 
Muhlenburg 4 LVC 
LVC 14 Dickinson 9 
LVC 16 Allentown 1 
LVC 8 Gettysburg 6 
Gettysburg 1 LVC 
Swarthmore 19 LVC 4 
Millersville 9 LVC 3 
Alvernia 5 LVC 4 
LVC 6 Alvernia 3 
LVC 9 York 4 
LVC 8 York 6 

Overall 12-13 
MAC 1-3 




by Bryna Vandergrift 

With only two games left, the 
LVC Men's Volleyball Club team 
holds a 5-8 record. Some of the 
wins include a pre-season win 
over Elizabethtown, Bloomsburg 
and Cabrini College. Team 
member Chuck Rusconi said that 
the team is much improved over 
last year when they finished 5-6 
for the season. Most of their 
losses have been decided in the 
fifth game. LVC placed fifth out 
of ten in both the Garnet and 
Juniata tournaments, where they 
competed against teams such as 
Millersville, Penn State Main 
Campus and Villanova. 

The best part of this year is that 
it is the last year for the team as 
a club. Rusconi said that they just 
filed for a petition to be a varsity 
sport and they are hoping that 
they will be able to announce it 
at the sports banquet at the end of 
April. All teams automatically get 
a bid to the MAC playoffs which 
start this Saturday. 

1302 E. Main St. 

Kegs, Taps, Cases, 
Ice, Cups, Mixers 
& Munchies 
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Hours: Mon.-Thurs.: 10-9 
Friday: 10-11 
Saturday: 9-1 1 

Women's Softball 

by Bryna Vandergrift 

Halfway through the season, 
LVC women's softball team 
brought their record to 3-5 
overall, after a split with Western 
Maryland last Saturday. 

In the first game LVC lost to 
Western Maryland 11-10 in the 
last inning. In the second game, 
LVC women came back to beat 
Western Maryland 7-5. Michelle 
Sullivan pitched for the win and 
Barb Lowie received the save. 
Lebanon Valley's two other wins 
came at Kings College in a dou- 
ble header. Other losses include 
Susquehanna(2), Allentown, and 
Messiah Colleges. 

"Western Maryland is a very 
good hitting team so I was en- 
couraged by their play," stated 
head coach Kathy Tierney. 

Tierney also added that a lot of 

the team's strength comes from 
their young infield of four 
freshmen and a sophomore. 
Freshmen include Caprice Carr- 
irfgton, Jen Leito, Nannette 
Bassinsky and Danielle Camp- 
bell. Sophomore Diane Churan is 
at first base. 

Tierney also commented on the 
only two seniors on the team, 
Glenda Shetter and Marianne 
Lamereaux, stating that "they are 
the team's stabilizing force." 

"I want to keep getting better 
and I don't want the girls to lose 
their confidence. If we can get 
some of the younger players more 
experience, then our team will get 
stronger and more confident," 
said Tierney. 

The women's next home game 
is Saturday at home against 
Elizabethtown College. 


Walleyball Intramurals are go- 
ing on until April 29 in the Ar- 
nold Sports Center. All teams 
must have their nine games com- 
pleted by the 29th. Playoffs will 
be scheduled for the top four 
teams the following week. 

Women's racquetball is in its 
second week. Members must still 

complete two games a week to 
keep their standing on the ladder. 
Whoever is in the number one 
spot on May 2 will be declared 
the winner. 

Upcoming events— Swimming. 
Contact Arnold Sports Center for 
more information about the one 
day competition April 20. 



27 East Main St. 
L Annville, PA 
L~ 867-2457 


Free Delivery 
for College 

Mon.-Fri. 8-6 
Sat. 9-12 


231 W. Queen St., Annville 


Buff up old paint. Upholstery & Interior Cleaning. 
Special Spring Cleaning price till the end of May. 

The Hairworks 

445 E. Maple St. Annville 

Salon Services: 

Perms Frostings Condition 
Color Highlights Treatment 

Men & Women's Hairstyles 

Nexxus Redken Products 

S.C.A. Wolff Sunbed 
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$4.00 per visit 
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p. 6 THE QUAD Thursday, April 14, 1988 


by Bryna Vandergrift 

Sophomore Dan Reichenbach 
broke another record at the 
Messiah Invitational last Satur- 
day, with a jump of 23 feet, one- 
half inch. The old Messiah field 
record was 22.1/2. LVC placed 
10th in the invitational. 

In the women's meet, LVC 
placed fifth out of 14 colleges. 
Winners include Cindy Sladek's 
second place win in the 800 run; 
Joanne Giannettino's second in 
the 400 hurdles, plus fourth in the 
long jump; and Sue Yingst's se- 
cond in the high jump. 

Golf In The Swing 

by Bryna Vandergrift 

Lebanon Valley's golf team is 
off to a good start with a 4-2 
record. LVC's wins include 
Western Maryland, Lycoming, 
Kings and Albright. Losses came 
from Dickinson and Philadelphia 

The nine member team consists 
of (1) Tom Giovinazzo, (2) Jeff 

Randazzo, (3) Gary Zimmerman, 
(4) Andy Potter, (5) Chris Ar- 
nold, (6) Phil Grecco, (7) Matt 
O'Bierne, (8) Chris Lucci and 
(9) Toni Buglio. 

LVC's next home match is 
against Wilkes and Scranton on 
the 2 1 st at the Lebanon Country 

The most 

motivating and 
exciting course 
you can take 
in college. 

For more information, contact 
Capt. Dabrowski at 717-245-1221. 
Call collect. 




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It was a great experience 
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"I really en joyed meet i ng the 
people from the different 
conferences. I learned a lot 
and had fun." 

Dary I Hess, sumner 1987 






see p. 4 

APRIL 28, 1988 

Firm Proposes Improvements 

New Campus Plan? 

by Steve Trapnell 

The architectural firm of 
Spillman-Farmer, which is 
presently conducting the college's 
long range facilities study, 
presented a report on Tuesday 
ApriJ 19. After spending six full 
days on campus, the firm outlined 
a potential plan to improve col- 
lege facilities. 
The long range facilities 
ilanning committee considers 
Lynch Gym the greatest resource 
of the campus. They believe it 
could be redesigned to accom- 
modate an Academic Activities 
I Center which would include 
research and seminar rooms, 
classrooms, offices, a tiered 
lecture hall, a career counselling 
center, a computer lounge, and 
student activities rooms. This 
facility would be the only one of 
its kind to incorporate leadership, 
business, academic, and activities 
mterests under one roof. In order 
to complete this project, a new 
gym would have to be built at the 
Arnold Sports Center. 
According to the committee's 
re port, one of the major advan- 
ces of Lebanon Valley College 
ls that it is a compact campus with 
a lot of open space. A major 
drawback is the fact that a 
ra ilroad bisects the campus. In 
0r der to reinforce the connection 
Ween the two halves of the 
Ca mpus, one suggestion of the 
j- 0r nmittee is to turn the walking 
br 'dge into a structure, including 
snack shop. According to 
P'llman-Farmer, another 
^akness of college facilities is 
^ at most buildings are almost 
[ 0r npletely accessible to 
an dicapped individuals, 
^hen talking to students, the 
Cor nmittee found that the greatest 
Indent complaint was for better 
lbr ary facilities. Spillman- 

Farmer believes that the library 
can be improved at its present 
location. One possibility would 
be to relocate the computer center 
to free up more space in the 
library. The extra space could 
then be used to increase storage 
or student work space. The 
atmosphere of the library could 
also be improved to make it more 
condusive to studying. 

The administration building 
provides continuity with the 
college's past. The architectural 
firm feels that it "needs loving 
care" and a lot of upgrading. 
Other possible plans include an 
elevator, a central main entrance 
onto the academic quad, and a red 
brick exterior, which would pro- 
vide continuity with the other 
buildings located on the quad. 

Spillman-Farmer considers 
Laughlin Hall a poor facility for 
college development and com- 
munity relations. The firm pro- 
posed moving these services into 
the Carnegie building, which 
would help to showcase the col- 
lege's history. Admissions and 
other departments now in the 
Carnegie building could be 
moved to Center Hall, a more 
centrally located position on the 

The study committee decided 
that the best potential main 
entrance to the college is the 
intersection of Sheridan Avenue 
and Route 934. If this were made 
the school's main entrance, 
Center Hall would be a good 
location for Admissions. 

Search Still On 

by Steve Trapnell 

During the second semester, 
the Presidential Search Commit- 
tee has continued to look for the 
best candidate to lead Lebanon 
Valley College. In the course of 
this search, it brought about six 
of the candidates to the college 
for a campus visit. 

Recently, Mr. John A. 
Synodinos, the consultant who 
had been helping the Presidential 
Search Committee locate can- 
didates, applied for the position 
of president of the college. He 
and his wife were scheduled to 
visit the campus today. 

Dr. Arthur Ford, a member of 
the committee, commented that 
the search is an ongoing process. 
While one candidate is visiting 
the college, another may be in- 
volved in interviews with the 

committee. The committee is also 
constantly reviewing records of 
different candidates. According 
to Ford, when the proper person 
is found, all stages of the search 
will end. 

Ford said that the seach com- 
mittee is looking for individuals 
who are in demand at other 
places. Naturally, the college will 
lose some of those candidates to 
other job offers. Since the com- 
mittee is not willing to settle for 
second best, the search has been 

According to Ford, the 
Presidential Search Committee is 
trying to find someone with ex- 
perience in higher education, ex- 
perience in development work, a 
commitment to the Leadership In- 
itiative, and good administrative 

Former President Arthur L. Peterson. 

To Speak At 

by Rob Andrew 

Dr. Arthur L. Peterson, former 
president of Lebanon Valley Col- 
lege, will speak at the 1 19th an- 
nual commencement on Sunday, 
May 8, 1988. His address will be 
entitled "Memories, Melodies 
and Motivations." 

Inaugurated as the 14th presi- 
dent of LVC in 1984, Peterson's 
many accomplishments include 
doubling the school's endowment 
and developing the leadership 
program that set a trend for col- 
leges nationwide. Because of 
health reasons, Peterson resign- 
ed as Lebanon Valley's president 
in July, 1987 and currently serves 
as director of the Acadamy of 

Senior Professionals at Eckerd 
College in St. Petersberg, 

Joining Peterson as 
distinguished guest for the 1988 
commencement will be Rev. 
Stanley Imboden, Rector of St. 
James Episcopal Church in Lan- 
caster. Rev. Imboden will serve 
as the Baccalaureate speaker. 

Robert K. Greenleaf, retired 
Director of Management 
Research for AT&T, will be 
recognized with an Honorary 
Doctor of Letters Degree for his 
work in the area of utilizing ser- 
vant leadership to build a better, 
more caring society. 


p. 2 THE QUAD Thursday, April 28, 1988 

Changes For LVC 

by Christina Weber 

Only 10 more days until graduation. I'm sure that the countdown 
for most of us has been tremendously tedious and horrendously hard. 
But, that point is moot because in ten days it won't matter anymore. 
What will matter is what is left behind, what will change and what 
will disappear. In honor of my last editorial (no cheering, please), 
I would like to put forth a few changes I want to see when I return 
in ten years. 

* 1* How about some security guards that aren't older than my grand- 
father, that don't stand around chatting in the College Center on 
blustery winter nights, that can speak any language other than Penn- 
sylvania Dutch and that don't think they are Crockett and Tubbs when 
they bust a party? 

*2* If Walt Smith would come out of his office as much as he doesn't 
answer his beeper then maybe we could have some efficient security. 
*3* Everyone in Green/Pink complains about the shower heads be- 
ing so low, but I would be willing to settle for some toilets that flush. 
One would think that sanitation concerns would be a must. 
*4* If the deans' office is going to give some people personal atten- 
tion, everyone should receive personal attention. I can get up in the 
morning very well on my own, so the dean is more than welcome 
to do my laundry. Silks handwashed, please, and a light starch on 
collars and cuffs. 

*5* A Greek council may not please the administration, but let's all 
remember the fate of greeks at F&M. I've said it before~if the greeks 
form some kind of internal unity amongst the various organizations, 
the power would be ominous. 

*6* If LVC could find it within the financial structure to replace the 
stolen Elizabethtown College dorm mats, I would be positively 

delighted. It is quite tacky to have a mat with a large "E" on it 
welcoming visitors to LVC. 

*7* Abolishing the intervisitation policy would be a plus. My own 
mother doesn't tell me when to come home. We pay a great deal of 
money for the honor of attending this prestigious school. A leader 
from a leadership school should be able to make up his own mind 
as to when to call it a night. 

*8* A library with a majority of its books dated after 1911 might 
prove beneficial to the students. It's hard to provide the latest data 
in a certain subject if one can only utilize books older than the collec- 
tive age of any three people on campus. 

*9* More parking spaces would probably cut down the revenue the 
school receives due to illegally parked cars. Why would someone park 
in a tow away zone if there would happen to be plenty of parking 
spaces? It is impossible to find a space when there is any kind of minor 
event happening at the school. When I return as an alumnus and can- 
not find a parking place anywhere on campus, I think I'll park on 
the grass in front of the Ad building. Maybe then they will get a clue. 
(Yeah, I doubt it too.) 

These are just a few suggestions I have for the administration to 
begin working on. If, by chance, they run out of things to do, just 
have the alumni office drop me a little note when they send me let- 
ters stating the school needs my money more than I do. 
P.S. I would like to thank Stephen, Dwayne, Chris, Ian, Lisa, Toni, 
Bob, Kathy, Sylvia, Becky, Rob, Skippy, Mike, Lance, Dave, Rick, 
Martha, Bryna (of course) and anyone else who gave their time and 
energy to The Quad. A special thanks goes to Drs. Ford and 
Markowicz (is that spelled right?) for having the time and patience 
to put up with this insanity. 

Maybe Next Year... 

by Steve Trapnell 

Well, here we are at the end of another academic year. In about 
a week, most of us will be gone for the summer. Some of you will 
be gone for good (or at least until Homecoming). At times like these, 
many people like to reflect upon the past year. Remembering times 
gone by isn't just fun, it's also a great way to put off studying for 
exams. So, during our last few days here, I encourage you to take 
a mental trip back through the 87-88 academic year. Rather than 
remembering the things you actually did do, however, I'd like you 
to think about some of the things you just didn't bother with. To help 
you get started, I've composed my own list of "Things I Should Have 
Done This Year— But Didn't." 

1 . I suppose I should have used the Arnold Sports Center more 
often. After all, it was put there for student recreation and enjoyment, 
so everyone should help the college get its money's worth. Even if 
you don't use the center very much, it still is a terrific conversation 
piece. All things considered, the Arnold Sports Center is a fine addi- 
tion to this school's battery of buildings. 

2. I guess I should have started to read my intercampus mail. I'm 
sure I'm probably missing a lot of important messages and notifica- 

tions by simply tossing it on my desk before reading my regular mail. 
Perhaps I would read it if it were made more interesting. I can never 
resist opening an envelope that says "YOU MAY ALREADY BE 
A WINNER." Anyway, I'll make a real effort to read all my inter- 
campus mail next year. 

3 . If I'm going to read the intercampus mail, I may as well listen 
to the announcements during lunch and dinner in the college dining 
hall. Whenever I'm eating, I inevitably hear only part of a message, 
and I spend the remainder of the meal trying to figure out what the 
full message was. The problem is that it's hard to hear the an- 
nouncements with everyone talking. I suggest that the college center 
try the airline approach. Every seat in the dining hall should be ac- 
companied by a set of earphones for those students who want to hear 
the announcements. 

4. Next year, I am definitely going to walk only on the paved 
walkways on the quads. Anyone who knows me well, and probably 
some people who barely know me at all, realize that I complain about 
the muddy condition of the college lawns. I'm as guilty as anyone 
else. It's much more convenient to take shortcuts across the grass/mud 

See Next Year p. 4 

Sawy Says 

Dear Dr. Sawy: 

Here I am at college, as busy 
as ever, trying to keep my grades 
up, and trying to keep a relation, 
ship up as well. The problem i s 
this someone special is not here 
The so-called "love of my lif e >^ 
is miles and miles away ^ 
another school. We talk on the 
phone maybe once a week and 
write to each other occasionally 
and get to see each other some 
weekends and we're attached at 
the hip when we're home together 
on vacation. But this is not that 

I feel my relationship is i n 
jeopardy, although I don't like to 
think so. I always imagine that 
we're still close together and that 
things will work out in the long 
run. Yet, I still have my doubts, 
What do you think these doubts 
are? Is it really worth the effort? 
Should I stay good friends and see 
other people here? I'm a bit con- 
fused. Let me hear your wisdom. 


Dear Paired-off: 

Your case is quite common 
among college students. It is dif- 
ficult to carry on with a boyfriend 
or girlfriend back at home or in 
another school. Even more dif- 
ficult than that is to eventually 
break the attachment. Love is 
hard to maintain over time and 
distance and it often requires 
patience that isn't so easy to 

Nevertheless, this is part of life 
and you are well aware of the cir- 
cumstances. But this does not 
mean you should ever give up. 
You should just be aware and 
know what is best for you. 
Perhaps maintaining that special 
love over the miles is a great 
challenge that you will grow 

Let me pull a little something 
from my "cliche bag: 
"Absence makes the heart grow 

Dr. Savrj 


Christina Weber Managing Editor 

Steve Trapnell News Editor 

Dwayne Nichols Layout Editor 

Bryna Vandergrift Sports Editor 

Lisa Camburn Proofreader 

Staff: Rob Andrew, Ian Bonner, Martha Bordic, Chris Craig, Sylvia Hay, Rick Klenk, Christopher 
Lonie, Mike McGranaghan, Doug Nyce, Toni Salam, Lance Shaffer, and Becky Snyder. 

Kathy Johnson Advertising Manager 

Bob Baker Business Manager 

Charlene Shaffer Assistant Business Manager 

Richard Arnold Financial Advisor 

Leon Markowicz Editorial Advisor 

New LVC Frat 

A new co-ed service fraternity 
is now in the early planning 
stages here at L.V.C., according 
to Ian Bonner, Freshman 
English/Spanish major. Since the 
concept has been developed in the 
last few months, a group of 
students have gathered to 
brainstorm ideas for the potential 

The fraternity is to be centered 
around the ideals and 
characteristics of leadership and 
may even be considered the 
"honorary" fraternity for those 
who are involved in different 

areas of campus life. 

During the recent brainstorm- 
ing sessions, potential fuW^ 
members discussed a statement o 
purpose, as well as forming 
constitution for the fraternity- 

Tentative requirements for 1,1 
fraternity have also been discus' 
ed, including good academic sta* 
ding (no specific G.P-A- * 
mentioned) and involvement 
campus organizations. 

Among the basic ideas rne 
tioned were "to promote etn» 
leadership through campus 
volvement" and "to get peop 
involved and unapathetic 

p. 3 THE QUAD Thursday, April 28, 1988 

Students Can 
Afford To Speak 

More Letters 
To The Editor 


A recent rash of theft has 
swept through second floor 
Hammond, leaving students 
baffled and angry. Since spring 
break the amount of theft in 
Hammond has increased 
drastically and so far none of the 
items have been recovered. 

One week prior to Easter 
break, Doug Mancini, in room 
214, had his 25 inch color televi- 
sion stolen. We are not talking 
about a pocket sized cassette or 
concealable item. For crying out 
loud, a full size set missing with 
no signs of forced entry. Sounds 
like an inside job to me. 

After Easter break, five more 
students returned only to feel 
violated of basic rights. Rob Red- 
man, in room 207, arrived late 
from an extended vacation. To 
Rob's dismay his Sony CD player 
along with a Sharp microwave 
oven were missing. Rob also had 
an early model VCR and a stack 
of soft rock CD's, but both were 
left behind. Again there was no 
sign of a forced entry. 

A new model RCA VCR was 
stolen from Scott McNeer along 
with his roommate's Summit 
refrigerator in room 204. Why 
Scott's superior VCR and not 
Rob's? Was this thief a con- 
sumer guide shopper? 

Buddy Oliver and Glen Lan- 
drum, in room 201, were also 
robbed. Approximately 21 CD's 
were taken, all hard/acid rock. 
Why Buddy's and Glen's CD's 
and not Rob's CD's? This seems 
like a taste of music or possibly 
a good knowledge of the floor. 
Then again, it could have been 
just a chance occurrence. 

Accusations are meaningless 
and little has been done. Could 
it be someone who has Fran 
Docherty's master key, missing 
since late February? You would 
think someone may just have 
that key due to the nature of all 
the robberies. Why has the dean 
or security not changed the 
locks? Are we not as important 
as the females who have prompt 
lock changes within days of a 
lost key? I resent it. You would 
think the loss of thousands of 
dollars worth of appliances and 
entertainment equipment would 
be incentive enough. 

Night watch cannot be left out 
of this either. They bear the keys 
for the four entrances. Without 
that key how could someone 
enter over break? Annville police 
were notified in Doug Mancini's 
case, incident number 88-323. 
Here is what I found in the 

report: police conversed with 
Walt Smith and I quote "He 
(Walt Smith) seemed not to be in- 
terested in assisting, from his 
reactions on the phone." This is 
not meant to be inclusive 
evidence, but a clearer message 
does stem from this official 
police report. 

These events are totally out of 
hand. More measures of preven- 
tion could have been taken and 
irresponsibility cannot be ruled 
out. I hope this is not repeated 
and my advice for next year is to 
think twice before bringing up 
expensive or sentimental things 
to school. But by the same token, 
should not the school be just a 
safe as place as home for all 

Andrew Hamann 

To the Editor: 

The two editorials in The Quad 
concerning the sale and/or free 
distribution of condoms on cam- 
pus ("Condoms on Campus", 
2/1 1/88; "Letters to the Editor", 
4/14/88) are based on a practical 
idea: reducing the risks of sexual 
intercourse (and other sexual con- 
tact), including pregnancy and 
sexually transmitted diseases. 
The major issue at hand appears 
to be where and at what cost these 
prophylactics should be made 
available at Lebanon Valley 

The school store is the obvious 
first choice for the sale of con- 
doms, as they are a marketable 
item that should be made 
available for the convenience of 
the students. They should be pric- 
ed according to market value. 
Unfortunately, the school store is 
not open 24 hours a day, seven 
days a week. 

Selling condoms in the laundry 
rooms, while being a "semi- 
inconspicuous place to purchase 
condoms," as well as a place to 
buy them "in the heat of passion" 
does not solve the problem. What 
happens when you have no 
change? Do you grab the hardest 
object nearby and smash the 
glass? (Only to discover the 
machine is empty?) 

The free distribution of con- 
doms, at the school store or 
elsewhere on campus, is not a 
realistic, responsible option. 
Somewhere along the line so- 
meone will be paying for these 
supplies. Since condoms are on- 
ly worn by some sexually active 

men, benefitting only them and 
their partners, dispersing the 
costs over the entire student body 
is not justifiable. 

Rather than be at the mercy of 
these unsure, potentially embar- 
rassing, and as of now forbidden 
sources, prudence suggests that 
you know your supply. For ex- 
ample, look in your toiletries 
drawer and assess its contents — 
do you have more than one 
deodorant? extra razor blades and 
shaving cream? foot powder? 
cough syrup? tampons or 
feminine napkins? Why not keep 
a supply of condoms? You can 
purchase them discreetly while at 
home or out with a friend (in case 
you don't have access to a car), 
and have them readily available . 
They are small enough so that 
even the most sexually active can 
keep a week's supply in a soap 
dish. So, have a few on hand, for 
when you plan it— and when you 

Respectfully submitted, 
Chris Hamann 

by Christopher Craig 

For the past two years, the 
theme of this column has been 
"the road less traveled by," a 
phrase borrowed from Robert 
Frost's poem, "The Road Not 
Taken." It is a simple theme, yet 
it forces individuals to make a 
choice: making a choice between 
walking down the easy path of 
life, following the worn footsteps 
of others, without facing new 
challenges, experiences, ideas, 
triumphs or failures, or choosing 
to venture down "the road less 
traveled," ignoring popular or 
accepted norms, while attempting 
to change oneself and others for 
the hope of a better life for all. 

The humble endeavor of this 
small corner in the Quad for the 
past two years has been to "of- 
fer a signpost," an alternative 
direction in place of the frequent- 
ly used path of the followers. 
Whether the topic is fraternities 
and the advent of Tau Kappa Ep- 
silon, the campaign of Jesse 
Jackson and his hope for 
economic justice, or the "Leader- 

by Rob Andrew 

Upton Sinclair recalls the 
phrase "money talks" as a com- 
mon cliche used during his 
childhood. He felt that since he 
didn't have any money that the 
phrase meant "shut up" in 
reference to him. Well, times 
have changed and now the 
printed, not the spoken word, 
controls the modern world. Even 
Sinclair admits that as a result of 
the information age, the common 
cliche during his childhood 
should be updated to "money 

Although Sinclair probably had 
different intentions, I interpret 
this new cliche to mean that the 
written word is a more valuable 
resource in today's world than the 
spoken one. As Americans, we 
have the unique privilege of a free 
press that is guaranteed by the 
first ammendment of our con- 
stitution. If one is broke, the 
phrase "money writes" does not 
translate into "shut up." 
Americans are never too poor to 
pay attention and never too ig- 
norant to be aware. But, most im- 
portantly, Americans are never 

ship College's" many faults, the 
endeavor has been to challenge 
the reader to understand, or even 
accept a less popularly accepted 
approach to certain issues. Many 
mistakes were made, enough to 
make any English Professor 
cringe, or school administrator 
cry "libel," but there is no offer 
of an apology. Such are the 
potholes of life. It is damn hard 
to bare your personal convictions 
for public scrutiny, criticism, or 
ridicule. But, in the final analysis, 
the jury of history will decree that 
at least the attempt, the effort, 
was made to make an impact for 
the better. 

Too often, even at the 
"Leadership College," people 
choose to complain from a seated 
position, fearful or lazy to act to 
improve a perceived fault. In- 
dividuals complained about the 
student paper, but refuse to write 
an article. Students criticized the 
Campus Concert but did not lift 
a finger to help. Many people are 
quick to support or oppose a 
president or political party, but 
few of these same people can 
publicly support their statements, 
and even fewer have taken the 
time to register to vote. 

denied the right to openly express 
their feelings or opinions in writ- 
ten words via the media. 

At Lebanon Valley College, 
The Quad affords anyone an op- 
portunity to express his opinion. 
This column has taken full advan- 
tage of this option, as have 
numerous other columns that 
have filled the pages of The Quad 
throughout the semester. 

The primary focus of this col- 
umn has been to expose the cam- 
pus community to important 
political issues from a certain 
point of view. Exposure is educa- 
tion. The Quad has offered many 
different views on several issues. 
An open forum for opinion is the 
heart of any campus newspaper 
and hopefully a tradition that will 
be continued. 

During Upton Sinclair's time, 
"muckraking" was a popular 
way of gathering and reporting 
the news. This column proudly 
considers muckraking as "a road 
less traveled by" and always has 
and will continue to try to present 
opinions based on open honesty 
and truth. 

Such is one of the ironic 
paradoxes of life. We can walk 
down the path of life, ignoring all 
challenges with little concern for 
anything other then ourselves. 
Often this "safe-way" will get 
people through life without many 
difficulties. But, there are those 
who dare to face the challenges, 
the hope and dreams of making 
a difference, however small, to 
walk the "road less traveled." 
Failure is frequent and success is 
rare, but these are individuals 
who live an existence truly their 
own. It will always be this small 
group of leaders who will forge 
a new path for others to blindly 
follow. The challenge in life is 
ours to meet, to face new ex- 
periences and opportunities so 
that we may better ourselves and 
those around us. The challenge is 
never easy, but its acceptance is 
the only true measure of personal 
worth and success. Thus, I 
humbly offer this challenge to 
those who have read this column. 
In the words of Robert Frost, "I 
chose the one less traveled by, 
and that has made all the dif- 


The Road Less Traveled By 

p. 4 THE QUAD Thursday, April 28, 1988 


The results of the recent student 
elections were released last week. 

Those students elected to the 
Student Judicial Board are Bryna 
Vandergrift, Theresa Leach, 
Kevin Dempsey, either Jack 
Malloy or Scott Richardson (to be 
decided in a runoff election), 
Brian Wassell and Jean Paul 

Students elected to serve on 
Student Council include Peter 
Fowler, Chuck Rusconi, Beth 
Trout, Mark Gibson, Ben Dear- 
dorff, Kelly May, Deb Spancake, 
Matt Andris, Cami DeClemente, 
Fred Neiswender, Dave Bolton, 
Bob Mikus, Bill Dietz, Doug 
Nyce, and Jef Betz. 




Dr. Arthur Ford, Chairman of 
the Department of English, has 
been named Fulbright lecturer in 
American Literature at Nanjing 
University in China for the 
1988-89 school year. 

At Nanjing University Dr. 
Ford will teach graduate courses 
in American literature and 
literary theory. He will also pre- 
sent lectures at various other 
universities in the Far East. 

The Fulbright Program is ad- 
ministered by the United States 
Information Agency of the State 
Department. Nominations are 
sent to USIA by the Council on 
the International Exchange of 
Scholars; however, the final 
selection is made by the host 

Dr. Ford and his wife will 
leave for China in August and 
spend the next eleven months liv- 
ing in Nanjing, a city of three 
million located near Shanghai. 

During the 1984-85 school year 
Dr. Ford taught as a Fulbright 
lecturer at the University of 
Damascus in Syria. 

Dr. Ford said he looks forward 
to teaching and living in China. 
' 'It's a part of the world we have 
always wanted to visit," he said, 
' 'and the best way to get to know 
a place is to live there for a 

Dr. Ford added that his ex- 
periences teaching abroad add a 
new dimension to his classes. "I 
found that I see American 
literature, indeed all of America, 
differently because I have been 
exposed to other views," he said. 

Dr. Ford will resume his 
teaching duties at LVC in 
September of 1989. 

Scott Carter was elected to the 
Board of Trustees. 

Officers for the Class of 1989 
are Scott Carter, President; Joe 
Lipinsky, Vice President; Renee 
Schuhart, Treasurer; and Lori 
Stortz, Secretary. 

Officers for the Class of 1990 
include Kevin Dempsey, Presi- 
dent; Cami DeClemente, Vice 
President; Melanie Fleek, 
Treasurer; and Toni Salam, 

Officers for the Class of 1991 
are Jean Paul Duvall, President; 
Kelly Snyder, Vice President; 
Brian Wassell, Treasurer; and 
John Busedu, Secretary. 

Scott Carter, next year's senior 
class president and Student 
Trustee, commented that voter 
turnout was better than in 
previous years. 

Karen Jones was the Election 
Chairperson. She was assisted by 
Kevin Dempsey. 

Six Final Videos 

by Mike McGranaghan 

Finals time is upon us once 
again, and that means most of our 
time will be spent cramming 
knowledge into our brains. This, 
of course, can be quite painful on 
the brain, and a study break will 
definitely be needed. Therefore, 
I now present the second edition 
of my Finals Home Video Guide, 
so that if you decide to rent a 
movie this week, you won't get 
stuck with something more bor- 
ing than what you're studying. 

Speaking of boring, the film 
"Maid to Order" is new in video 
stores. It stars Ally Sheedy as a 
rich brat whose father wishes she 
had never been born. One day— 
poof!— her past is erased and she 
is forced to work as a maid (of all 
things) until she learns to redeem 
herself. The movie starts out fun- 
ny, but sinks faster than the 
Titanic. I was glad when it was 
finally over. Ally Sheedy is a 

Next Year— cont. from p. 2 

than to walk on the paths. If a new system of walkways isn't possi- 
ble, maybe some strategically placed barbed wire would do the trick. 

5. I hope that next year I'll be able to spend more time hanging 
out in the lounge above the main entrance to Garber Science Center. 
It seems that whenver I'm in Garber, no one is using that lounge. 
I'm sure that if the right crowd starts frequenting the Garber fourth 
floor lounge, it will quickly become the campus's favorite night spot. 

6. Another thing I haven't gotten around to doing this year is figur- 
ing out the difference between the East and West Dining Rooms. I 
know it's rather trivial, but it's very inconvenient when an event is 
scheduled to take place in the "East Dining Hall" and you realize 
that you're a sophomore in college and you still don't know the four 
geographical directions. Oh well, I guess I'll straighten that out next 

7 . Next year, I am definitely going to win one of those raffles that 
different campus organizations are always holding. I enter so many 
of them, but I never seem to win a thing. Don't get me wrong, I'm 
not trying to be greedy. I don't mind supporting the activities of the 
campus, but an occasional prize never hurt anyone. 

8. Finally, next year, I'm really going to try to write an editorial 
that isn't a list of things. Enough said there. 

Now that you've seen how it's done, I encourage you to make your 
own list of things you didn't have time to do this year. Give them 
a high priority among your goals for next academic year. Before you 
do any of that, however, be sure you have a fun and relaxing sum- 
mer break. See you in the fall! 

good actress in desperate need of 
a good film. Don't bother with 
this one. (** out of four) 

Another video to stay away 
from is "The Squeeze" starring 
Michael Keaton as a guy trying 
to solve a murder AND fix the 
lottery. John Davidson is also 
featured as a dopey television 
personality (don't you love 
typecasting?). The stuff with the 
lottery is amusing, but if you're 
a Michael Keaton fan, you're bet- 
ter off seeing "BeetleJuice" or 
renting "Gung Ho." (*'/2) 

Also new on home video is last 
summer's James Bond picture, 
"The Living Daylights." 
Timothy Dalton is the new Bond, 
and for my money, he's the best. 
The action is top-notch, as 
always, particularly the opening 
scene. My only complaint is that 
the film is too long (over two 
hours), so occasionally things 
drag a bit. Still, it's the best Bond 
film in years. (***'/2) 

If horror films are more your 
style. I highly recommend "The 
Lost Boys." A group of stylish, 
teenage vampires (including 
Keifer Sutherland) terrorize a 
small California town. The only 
people who can stop them are 

some 15 year-old comic book 
readers armed with Holy Water 
squirt guns. There's a lot of 
humor in the movie, and the gore 
is kept to a minimum. "The Lost 
Boys" is perfect for fans of hip 
horror. (★★★ 1 / 2 ) 

Also amusing is "The Hid- 
den," about a creature from outer 
space who takes over the bodies 
of decent humans, turning them 
into evil criminals. It sounds like 
an average sleaze film, but the 
good acting and great special 
effects made it a hit with movie- 
goers and critics alike. I kind of 
enjoyed it, too. It's good, but not 
great. (***) 

The best bet on video is "In- 
nerspace." Dennis Quaid plays 
an astronaut who is miniaturized 
and accidentally injected into the 
body of supermarket clerk Martin 
Short. They are chased by in- 
dustrial thieves who want the 
computer chip needed to re- 
enlarge Quaid. The special effects 
are amazing, and the laughs are 
very big. Martin Short is ab- 
solutely brilliant. "Innerspace" 
was one of 1987's best films. 
Don't miss it! (★★★*) 

That's all for this year. Good 
luck on finals! 

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p. 5 THE QUAD Thursday, April 28, 1988 

QUAD Staff Changes 

The Quad has selected its 
editorial staff for next year. 
Sophomore English major Steve 
Trapnell, currently the News 
Editor, will assume the position 
of Managing Editor. Rob An- 
drew, a sophomore political 
science major, has served The 
Quad as a staff writer and colum- 
nist. He will become the News 

Editor. Dwayne Nichols, a 
sophomore religion major, will 
continue to serve as the Layout 
Editor. Freshman English major 
Ian Bonner has been chosen as the 
new Feature Editor. Junior ac- 
tuarial science major Chris Lonie 
will serve as Photography Editor, 
and Sylvia Hay will be the new 


Greek Week Highlights 

by Christina Weber 

The third annual Greek Week 
games were held this past week, 
April 17-23. Of the many greek 
organizations on campus only 
four teams actively participated in 
the events. Teams winning 
monetary prizes were: Knights 
1st place, $75; Clio 2nd place, 
$50; Delphians 3rd place, $25. 

A highlight of the week's 
events was mud volleyball. In the 
sorority games Delphians swept 







the series 2-0 against Gamma Sig 
and 2-1 against Clio. In the frater- 
nity games Knights played against 
themselves and won. A new game 
for sororities was introduced this 
year: belching. Kelly Stuckey of 
Clio won first place by a land- 
slide. In the pool relays, Knights 
toppled Clio at the doggie paddle 
by only a few seconds. 

Those greek organizations par- 
ticipating seemed to truly be en- 
joying themselves. Desanie 
Vlaisavljevic, Delphian, has this 
to say about this year's games: 
"Even though there were few 
organizations we all still had a 
great time. I think that Greek 
Week is a terrific way for the 
greeks to come together as a 

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Baseball Ups Record 

by Lance Shaffer 

The LVC baseball team upped 
its overall record to 16-18 with a 
13-10 victory over Penn State- 
Capital Campus. The game 
wasn't as close as it sounds, as the 
Dutchmen jumped out to a 10-1 
lead after just one inning. Daryl 
Hess had a big day at the plate, 
going 3-for-4 with a homerun, 
double and five runs batted in. 
Christian Foust and Chris Smith 
shared five other hits. Mike 
Spangler went the distance for the 

The previous day the Dut- 

chmen split a doubleheader with 
Western Maryland 6-7, 5-1. In 
game one, the Dutchmen 
squandered a two-run lead in the 
bottom of the seventh inning and 
lost 7-6. The Dutchmen scored 
five of their runs in the third inn- 
ing when Britt Mowery fueled the 
attack with a grand slam. Troy 
Celesky hit a solo homerun in the 
fourth and Lance Shaffer went 

In game two, the Dutchmen 
scored two runs in the third when 
Lance Shaffer and Christian 

Foust hit back-to-back triples and 
Chris Smith followed with a 
single. In the fourth, Bob Baker 
and Foust blasted solo homeruns 
to give the Dutchmen all they 
needed as Daryl Hess pitched a 
four-hit complete game. 

Against Juniata, the Dutchmen 
lost 13-10 and 25-7. Chris Smith 
and Lance Shaffer shared nine 
hits on the day and Don Lappin 
hit a grandslam, but the Dut- 
chmen couldn't stop Juniata's 
bats as they scored 38 runs and 
had 38 hits in the doubleheader. 

Drawing On The Power 

by Brian Engle 

At a time in the semester when 
most of us feel nearly crushed 
beneath the weight of the work 
we must get done, I thought it 
would be appropriate to write a 
few words of encouragement. 

I was reading recently in 2 Cor- 
inthians, where, in chapter 4, I 
found these words: "We are 
troubled on every side, yet not 
distressed; we are perplexed, but 
not in despair; persecuted, but not 
forsaken; cast down, but not 
destroyed." In these verses, we 
find that even amid the troubles 

there was still a shining ray of 
hope. Remember that Paul, the 
one who penned these words, 
went through all kinds of 
troubles. He was persecuted, im- 
prisoned, stoned, and even ship- 
wrecked. Yet through it all, he 
was neither distressed, nor in 
despair, neither was he forsaken 
nor destroyed. So if you feel the 
weight of academic persecution, 
if you feel imprisoned because 
you don't have the time to even 
go outside, if your syllabi are 
throwing academic stones at you, 

or if you feel you're about to 
drown in a sea of exams and 
papers and final projects, take 
heart. Paul had a blessed hope. 
"That you may know what is the 
hope of his calling, and what the 
riches of the glory of his in- 
heritance in the saints, and what 
is the exceeding greatness of 
power toward us who believe, ac- 
cording to the working of his 
mighty power" (Ephesians 
1:18-19). Paul drew on the power 
of God. You can too! 


Toy OTA kJlTH NO * 




6060 Allentown Boulevard, Harrlsburg 
(Exit 26E off 1-81) 


p. 6 THE QUAD Thursday, April 28, 1988 

Volleyball Finishes Season 

by Bryna Vandergrift 

Lebanon Valley Men's 
Volleyball Club team finished off 
a great season with a 7-8 record. 
One of the highlights of the year 
came when the club beat top 
ranked Elizabethtown College in 
five games. LVC also won their 
last game of the season at home 
against Dickinson College, 3-0. 

The team also made it to the 
Semi-finals of the MAC playoffs, 


Makes Par 

by Bryna Vandergrift 

The LVC Golf team's record 
now stands at 6-6 after wins to 
Gettysburg and Wilkes Colleges. 
Recently LVC has dropped 
games to Susquehanna, 
Muhlenberg, Moravian, and 
Scranton, but captain Andy Pot- 
ter remains optimistic. Potter said 
that there is still a match remain- 
ing against Widener and 
Deleware Valley which gives 
them a chance of ending with an 
8-6 record. Even so, LVC's 
record will still beat last years 
record of 4-10. 

where they lost to Bloomsburg 

"We had a pretty good 
season," stated team member 
Chuck Rusconi. "We were able 
to win the big games when we 
had to and we had a lot of en- 
couragement from fans and 
students." Rusconi and the rest of 
the team hope they will shortly be 
able to announce that they are an 
official team, after two years as 
a club team. 


Elizabethtown 11 LVC 6 
LVC 9 Albright 3 
F&M 1 1 LVC 7 
LVC 20 F&M 2 
Juniata 13 LVC 10 
Juniata 25 LVC 7 
West. Maryland 7 LVC 6 
LVC 5 West. Maryland 1 
LVC 13 PSU-Cap. Camp. 10 


by Bryna Vandergrift 

With only two doubleheaders 
left in the season, LVC Women's 
softball team stands with a 5-9 
overall record and a 1-5 record in 
the conference. 

The past two weeks have not 
been easy on the women. The 
women lost to state ranked 
Elizabethtown College in a 
doubleheader, 15-0, and 11-1. In 
the Franklin and Marshall games, 
LVC lost the first game 11-1, and 
lost the second game in extra in- 
nings when Franklin and Mar- 
shall scored eight runs in the top 
of the ninth. 

The women's only win came in 
a split with Juniata College. 
Lebanon Valley lost the first 
game but won the second 8-5. 

Barb Lowe pitches to Franklin & Marshall. 

QUAD photo by Chris Lonie. 

Head coach Kathy Tierney is 
pleased with this year's play and 
development of the younger team 
members, especially freshmen 
Nannette Bassininsky and Jen 

Tierney ended with commen- 
ting on the team's only two 

seniors, Glenda Shetter and 
Marianne Lamereaux. "It's been 
such a hard year for .both of them. 
Their job has been difficult 
because we're so young, but they 
have provided leadership and 
consistency that has helped us to 
keep getting better." 


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